@fcfddb69e2:
have already been told once via a tell that they did not have time for my query and i figured that was a polite way of telling me they do not like tells, i do realize as well, if i do not see anyone a tell may be of poor taste since it may distract someone trying to stay alive in a perilous situation (hence why i will not initiate tells now, unles it is to a player helper or a dm)
I think that would have been a player who was busy in combat and rather than saying nothing just wanted to let you know they didn't have time to help so that you could ask someone else and get your answer.
For a player helper, if you don't see any of their yellow messages or recognise any of the pcs in game as belonging to one of them, try this:
@fcfddb69e2:
(b) Use the Rest Menu
1. Activate the rest command, which brings up the RestMenu.
2. Select option 7, "Help - I need some help."
3. If there are any Player Guides currently playing, they will receive a message that a player is asking for some help, and get in touch with you.
4. If there are no Player Guides, the message will broadcast to all DMs currently on the server. If you do not wish to discuss the issue with a DM you may request that they attempt to get a PG to log in to talk to you.
But I would certainly not worry about sending tells. It is not poor taste to send one and most people love to help. If answering properly would distract them from staying alive they are likely to just say they don't have time to answer.
For finding other PCs to play with, eg PC Joe Bloggs who your character knows and you can see is in game, I'd encourage you to send a tell to that player eg "Cilwa asks the guards and merchants around Norwick if they've seen Joe Bloggs and if they don't know him she tells them what he looks like." Then the player can normally give you an idea of where to find Joe.
There is an IC map in game purchasable from a merchant which is expressly designed so that pcs can find each other, but the uptake has been disappointingly low - you can only find someone else who has map item. Your PC is bound to see this item being used at some point IC at some point and can ask about where to get herself one at that time.
