3. Diary of a Fuzzy Sorceress

Diary of a Fuzzy Sorceress


  • Entry 94

    I'm home.

    I'm sore. I'm tired. I'm upset that I didn't see Jynai. Hell, I didn't even make it to Cormanthyr. I was almost killed.

    Still, I think if I was presented with the same situation again, I do what I did again. I don't regret saving another's life.

    Rith is quite relieved that I am home. She missed me a lot. Maybe a bit more than I expected. I missed her, Fadia, and especially Jerrick, also. But it sounds my absense was felt hard by all three. I do admit I like and feel flattered that people care for me so much. However, I do feel a little bothered and guilty that they need me so much.

    I told Rith all about my trip. She made it clear that I'm not to go on another trip without her again. Hearing me tell about the twister and how close to death I was. And then she told me that she had been spending a lot of time around Jiyyd fighting fiends. Remember that she gave me her holy symbol before I left?

    And she says I worry her?!

    We truly are sisters, eh? Making each other worry. And we look even more alike now. I've grown my hair out a some, and she cut her hair back. Our hair is about the same length now.

    There's an interesting revelation for me. For years, whenever I looked in the mirror, I felt that the reflection wasn't me, Lorelai. It's Tindra's reflection. I looked different. Brown skin, dark brown hair, brown eyes, a bit more of an exotic looking face. That's just how I remember how I should look.

    But now… it's different. I feel like I could accept my current blonde-haired reflection as myself.


  • Entry 93

    Quite a lot has happened since I wrote last. Most of it bad, unfortunately.

    That storm was caused by a cult of Talos. The city watch, local adventurers, and some of us caravan guards went to stop the cult. I managed to free an avariel they were going to sacrifice. The high priest didn't like that and called on his god's wrath.

    I've never seen a twister before. I hope NEVER to see one again.

    I got caught by the winds of that twister, thrown high into the air. My last thought was confirming death as my fate.

    I woke to a nightmare. I couldn't move, I felt pain all over, and the nightmare was still fresh in my mind. I wasn't rational at all, like a wounded and scared animal. My form even changed to a feline, which was probably one thing that I shouldn't have done.

    After I calmed, Tojan explained. I fell on a tent where Michael found me. He was able to keep me alive, but my left arm and both legs were broken in several places from my fall. We were on a wagon caravan to another city, to find somebody who had the skill to set my bones the right way before healing them. My shapeshifting… kinda messed that up.

    We found a priest of Ilmatar, but he didn't think he could treat a feline properly. Luckily, he knew a druid of Mielikki who was skilled in caring for animals. The druid was a nice fellow. He had to break my legs again where they started healing from my shapeshifting. My bones weren't knitting right because they had been bound in splints while I was a half-elf. If he kept them as they were, I'd be unable to walk probably.

    It was painful, very painful. The druid and priest both did what they could to ease it for me, but breaking bones is not something that only tickles. The only reason I can write is because my right arm wasn't broken at all.

    As soon as I'm feeling up to traveling again, I'll be heading back to Narfell. The storm wrecked a lot of boats anyways, so I probably can't cross the Moonsea at this time.

    Jynai, I hope you are well.

    Rith, I'll be home soon.


  • Her family and friends lay dead at her feet, their faces frozen with the pained look of betrayal. "Yes, my pet," a dark sinister voice whispered from afar, yet sounded as clear as if it's owner were spoke the words in her ear. "You are meant to create such lovely havoc for me. You are MINE!"

    Tindra jolted awake with a loud scream. In her terror she thrashed and cried her denials at the nightmare, NEVER would she be taken again. She sobbed for Jerrick, for Rith, for Fadia. Her legs and arm radiated intense pain, making her scream more in her hysterical state. Two people ran to her to calm her as she cried from the nightmare and cried out from pain. Animal instincts took over, her form shifted into a panther. She roared and snarled, trying to stand yet, unable to from the pain.

    A lone voice called out to her. One familiar and soothing. Tindra began to calm at the voice, and let exhaustion return her to sleep.

    
"That's it, my Kitty, go back to sleep. We'll get you fixed up soon." Tojan reached out to and gave the sleeping panther a comforting hug. The pixie gave a big sigh of relief.

The blonde-haired man looked on worriedly. "What was that all about? Is she going to be alright?"

"It was a nightmare, Savior," the pixie responded to the acolyte of Lathander. "They are being caused by a mean fae. She's been sleeping so much and hasn't had the tea Fang gave her to keep them away. I'll get her to drink some later. Her legs worry me though. They are still broken, and I doubt shapeshifting helped much. They probably knitted together wrong!"

He noded and chanted a prayer of blessing over her and asked his Lord to grant her mind peace. He then began to rebind the splints on her legs, adapting them to her new form. "How did she change her shape? I thought she was a sorceress, not a druid."

The dwarf, whom Tojan has dubbed, Cleaver, shook his head. "She be no druid, lad, tho' rumors say she's wit 'em a lot. Yer lookin' atta werecat."

The young priest gulped and turned a little pale. "A w-werecat?" He looked the sleeping feline over. "W-well, I suppose she can't be bad if Rith treats her like a sister, right?"

The dwarf and pixie nodded.

"I'll go tell the others to get the caravan moving again. Perhaps you should stay with your kitty, miss Tojan? She seemed to calm at your voice." With that, said, the man exited the wagon. Moments later, it began to move again.

Cleaver sat down and pulled out a flask from within his armor and pulled out the cork. He took a swig of the strong spirits inside and laughed. "Ach! Tis always amusing t'see how the younguns react to stuff none o' their tranin' has prepared them for."

"Yeah. I'm sure that be an interesting journal to read! 'Dear Diary, I saved a woman's life days ago. Today I found out she's a monster. What to do?' " Tojan giggled.

The dwarf laughed in response. "Well, wit luck we'll be arrivin' at the capital soon, little'un. Too bad 'bout yer trip bein' left undone, but it be better to fix yer kitty up, right?"

"Yeah. No ship to cross Moonsea either."

    "Wake up my Dark Kitty."

    Tindra barely opened one eye and found Tojan staring right in front of her feline nose. She responded with a growl. Her head pounded with a headache. Her limbs hurt and wouldn't move, like they were tied to wood.

    "Come now, you need to take your tea before you have another nightmare. Oh! Don't change shape though, your legs… they're broken."

    Tindra lifted her head and looked down at her legs, three of them bound in splints. She gave a heavy sigh and looked around at her surroundings, noticing she was in a wagon again.

    "Here's the short, short story, Kitty. You landed near Savior, a tent broke your fall... somewhat. If Savior wasn't there, you'd have died! But your legs are still busted, and Savior is only a young priest. We're trying to get you to a city with a healer who can fix you right. And then, Dark Kitty... back home. We'll try again another time."

    Tindra nodded to her pixie sadly.


  • It was a dark and stormy night…

    Tindra shook her head.‭ ‬While she couldn't help to think that thought as she stepped out of the inn,‭ ‬she knew she didn't want that to be the start of her next diary entry afterward.‭ ‬Even if it really was a dark and stormy night.

    The winds seemed to howl angrily as rain poured down in a torrential deluge.‭ ‬The‭ ‬dark sky suddenly lit up brilliantly with the flash of a lightning strike followed almost immediately with a loud booming crash of thunder.‭ ‬Tindra grimaced at the sound,‭ ‬painful to her sensitive ears.‭ ‬She quickly cast some protective spells on herself and began to run up the street where she saw a crowd gathered.

    She wasn't the only one who suspected the storm was not a natural‭ ‬occurrence.‭ ‬There were some of the city watch,‭ ‬some of the guards from her caravan including Strom,‭ ‬and a few other‭ ‬adventurers.‭ ‬Tindra listened‭ ‬to the rumors shouted over the wind.‭ ‬The city watch were convinced the storm was being caused by a cult of Talossan priests who were barred entry to the city,‭ ‬and they asked for help in stopping the Talossans.‭ ‬The group headed to the outskirts of the small city,‭ ‬as another‭ ‬lightning bolt‭ ‬blasted down around them.‭ ‬Tindra frowned with worry as she saw the clouds overhead seemed to rotate.‭ ‬Never before had she seen such a sight.‭ ‬Then she noticed the rotating seemed to have a center,‭ ‬over a cliff where she could just see some figures.‭ ‬She shouted to the others,‭ ‬and they all agreed to check it out.

    As they neared the cliff,‭ ‬the group were attacked‭ ‬by Talossans and air elementals. The wind made it difficult for Tindra's arrows to fly accurately, so kept herself invisible and helped people with a friendly spell or two during the combat. The melee felt like a chaotic mess. The loud storm brewing overhead made it near impossible to hear any orders unless they were bellowed out. Coordination almost was accidental more than it was intentional. Strom seemed to fair the best. His stocky frame held against the wind like a mountain as he proclaimed glory to Moradin with powerful swings of his waraxe. Everybody rallied to the dwarf and pressed on the fight, slowly making their way to the cliff top.

    A handful of priests stood in a circle around an altar. One priest, a man with gray hair and a beard led them in chanting. Tindra figured he was the high priest of the cult. Tied to a wooden pole next to the high priest was a beaten elven woman. Tindra growls as she realized the cult's intent. They were calling on Talos's wrath, and intended the elf as a sacrifice.

    Still invisible, she leaned over to Strom and yelled into his ear. "Lead the charge at them. Distract them all, especially the high priest," she said. "I'll rescue their victim."

    The dwarf nodded and called out to the priests as the group charged in. Their ceremony was disrupted and the cult took up their spears to fight back. Strom himself rushed the high priest and almost knocked him down with a bash from his shield. Tindra ignored the fighting and swiftly moved to the elf and pulled out a dagger to cut the bindings. The half-elf paused for a moment in surprise; what Tindra thought was a cloak of feathers actually wasn't a cloak but the elf's wings. She was an avariel!

    Tindra bid the elf not to move as she was freed but to wait for Tindra to cast. The woman thanked Tindra as the ropes fell away. A moment later, Tindra began to cast a spell, turning the avariel invisible like herself. The winged elf immediately ran for safety.

    The high priest noticed his intended sacrifice had disappeared and roared with anger. He called out to his god, calling on him to punish the heathens who interrupted the ceremony and stole their sacrifice. The winds howled in response, and Tindra couldn't help but feel uneasy. The clouds in the sky spun faster and faster, forming a funnel of swirling cloud and wind. She gazed in amazement, never having seen a tornado before. To Tindra, it looked as if a giant finger of Talos was reaching down to the land. She shouted a warning as her invisibility spell wore off. Strom and the others began to flee, as well as some of the priests. Tindra ran as well as the tornado swept across the ground, leaving destruction in it's wake. The high priest shouted something foul at the group fleeing before him, and then was swallowed by the very storm he summoned.

    The howling winds became louder and louder as Tindra ran. She stole a quick look behind her and felt terror wash over her. A moment later, the tornado overtook her.


  • Entry 92

    By Selûne, what a storm that's come up! The locals say it's the worst they've seen in the past couple of decades. No ships will be leaving until it's gone. Hell, the whole town is practically closed up; everybody's staying in doors. What timing, Sullivan informed me that we were scheduled to leave tomorrow morning.

    Michael is also staying at the same inn that I am at. He finally badgered me enough to talk about Rith. I didn't want to, but he wouldn't take no for an answer. I bet he would have followed me even. And it was hard to say no when he offered me a bottle of Silverymoon Ruby. Shame on me for mentioning the other day that it's my favorite wine.

    I told him everything. When I first met her, how much she's become a part of my family, how pained she was at the idea of leaving us, deciding to stay, trying to fix other problems like the demons in Jiyyd or the Dark Enchantress… just kept talking until the bottle of Ruby was empty and then some. Michael seems to understand her reasons for staying. I'm not sure if he agrees with them, but he understands. I hope Rith forgives me if this causes any grief. Michael promised me that he would seek Lathander's guidance about it. I stressed to him that Lathander seems to approve of her choice.

    Wow, that storm is getting worse out there. It makes me wish I was back in my nice solid cave. No worries of wind or lightning in th-

    Fark! That was clo-

    This is not a natural storm. I'm going out there.


  • Entry 91

    We've arrived at the town. It's bigger than Norwick, but not as big as Peltarch. Which in a way feels odd. There's some big buildings, but it's not as urban as I see in Peltarch. I don't feel as claustrophobic. Sullivan gave us our pay earned so far since a couple of the guards were planning not to continue across the Moonsea. While Sullivan went to handle his business, I set off to find a nice inn to stay at. The food is decent and their selection of drinks is good, though they don't have Silverymoon Ruby. It's the same inn that Shana and Maria are staying at, our rooms are next to each other.

    It's been a nice stay here so far, though I had gotten quite a surprise today. I was walking down the market district, just browsing through the wares. A person grabbed me from behind exclaiming, "Aha! I finally found you!" I spun around to find a young man in armor ranting at me. He's lucky, to be honest. My hand was just about to weave together a spell when I realized what he was babbling about. While he was a little too excited to make out everything he said, three words did stick out. "Found," "missing," and "Cormyr." And then he called me Rith.

    Uh oh.

    I got him to calm down, and took a more careful look at him. He looked not even twenty summers old. Short blond hair neatly trimmed, green eyes, fairly handsome. The armor he wore had a symbol of Lathander adorning it. I had him follow me to the inn and we sat down to talk over a drink. My suspicion was proven true, the young man had mistaken me for Rith. I wonder what she'd think of that.

    On second thought, maybe I shouldn't mention it to her?

    The young man, Michael, is an acolyte from her temple in Cormyr. They are worried about her not returning after being summoned back. Michael wasn't sent out to find her, but he knew of her disappearance. He was rather disappointed when he realized I wasn't her. I think the ears gave it away first. And of course my eyes are blue whereas Rith's are amber.

    I didn't tell Michael anything about Rith. I tried to keep things cool and calm. I think he suspects I know more. I'm just not sure if I should tell him. Sure, her people probably do have a right to know where she is. And it's probably going to happen eventually that they do send somebody to find her. But I don't want her to be forced home unless that is what she truly wishes.

    Yes, there's the whole, "I don't want to lose another sister," thing too.

    <g>Fark.</g>


  • Entry 91

    It took a few days, but Shana and Maria eventually did start talking to me again. I'm not exactly sure what Tojan said to convince them that I'm a "nice kitty," but it worked. I'm glad for it. The days felt longer with that uncomfortable silence.

    We have just another day's travel to go until we reach town. I forget what Sullivan said the name of the town is. We should be staying there for a day or two, as Sullivan sells some goods and acquires other goods. After that, it's onto a chartered boat and across the Moonsea.

    ((OOC: Holy crap, I've written over 100 posts!))


  • Entry 90

    Up until today, our trip has mostly been uneventful. There were some kobolds, which weren't much of a threat. A few brigands too, but they were a small group who wisely ran away. Today, however, we were besieged by orcs.

    It was no small attack. These were orcs who obviously were expecting a sizable caravan guarded well. I started off by using my magic to protect myself and make Shana and Maria invisible, then started to launch arrow after arrow at the oncoming orcs while Strom charged ahead with some others. The orcs were numerous though, and our counter assault only held back half the group. As the orcs were closing in on my wagon, I ordered Shana and Maria to stay hidden and quiet no matter what, then made myself invisible and shapeshifted and waited for the right moment to strike.

    I must say with satisfaction that the sudden appearance of a large werecat surprised the orcs. Others who had stayed with the wagons also charged out to engage the beasts, though many stayed away from me. A shriek caught my attention while in the melee; one orc got close to wagon and scared Shana. At that shriek, my rage boiled. I let it take over, strengthening me. I can't say I remember much more than just constantly ripping into orc after orc without pause for several minutes. I only stopped when I found no more were standing.

    A few of us guards fell in the battle, but the priest of Waukeen was able to revive them. Strom seems to be showing me a little more respect, but Shana hasn't said much to me for the rest of the day. I think she may have watched the battle and realized I'm a werecat. I hope the rest of this trip isn't filled with the awkward silence I felt tonight.


  • Entry 89

    The merchant, Sullivan, is a decent fellow. He's a bit on the short and round size for a human, but that suits his jovial personality well. I was a bit surprised that he wasn’t bothered when I flat out told him that I was a werecat (I figured it'd be better to be up front about it). It sounds like he's hired other odd people like saurials as caravan guards in the past.

    Each of us guards were paired up and assigned a wagon to stick with. We are free to wander or scout about, as long as one of us remains with our assigned wagon. My partner is a dwarven warrior, Strom Thunderstone. He's as gruff as you'd expect a dwarf to be and as loud as his clan name suggests. He specifically volunteered to be my partner so he can keep an eye on me. He doesn't trust my being what I am. His waraxe looks blessed with symbols of Moradin, so I think I'll prove he doesn't need to use it on me. We worked out a good plan though. Since he's got a steed to ride, I'll ride in the wagon so he can move about and keep an eye on things around us. When we stop, I'll scout about since I can more easily move about undetected and he'll stick with the wagon.

    Our cargo looks like it's typical stuff. Clothing, some spices, wines, furs. Also in our wagon are a couple of passengers, a mother and daughter. The little girl, Shana, is nine summers old, and is quite adorable. The first question she asked me is how I got to be so pretty. Both Shana and Maria, her mother, have been pleasant company on the journey. I think Maria is especially glad thankful that I'm not a male guard. Whenever Shana has gotten bored, either I would entertain her with some small cantrip or Tojan would start playing with her. The pixie really likes Shana, or "Rosey" as the pixie has dubbed her.

    Sullivan told me that we should be traveling through Damara to the Moonsea and then charter a ship across it into Cormanthyr. And while the caravan will move on to human settlements, I'll hopefully be breaking off and trying to find Jynai's people. I honestly didn't expect Cormanthyr was as close as it is. For some reason I expected I'd have to cross all the way to Waterdeep or something. Hopefully, this trip will be short.


  • Entry 88

    A little voice has been nagging me the past few days. I can't ignore it either. I trust my instincts and they are telling me I should see Jynai. Why? A couple of reasons, I think.

    First, I never did have a proper goodbye. It is something that bothers me, not having that goodbye. Ever since being exiled from my tribe without the chance to say farewell to my mother, it's always bothered me when I don't have the chance to give a final farewell to somebody who is leaving me. I would have had to hunt down Rith for that same reason, if she didn't come back.

    Second, I suppose it's harder to put to words. I just feel that she might need me. It's like how Rith can instantly tell when something is bothering me. It's something that comes from being a big sister to another.

    I told the others of my decision to take the trip to Cormanthyr. At least things should be less dangerous without Jynai's father leading things. It still won't be completely safe there. Jerrick doesn't want me taking fey paths like he did, not with my nightmare issues. So I'll be going by caravan.

    Jerrick, Fadia, and Rith of course worry for me, but they support my decision to go. Rith even gave me her necklace, a holy symbol of Lathander. I almost want to sneak it back into her room. She told me it's okay for me to keep it, to help guard me. I know that it's very important to her though. She's a priestess, this holy symbol is like a weapon of faith in her hands against demons and undead. But I know her reasons to give it to me. It's not just to help guard me against my own nightmares. She's giving me a physical reason to return. She expects me to come home and give it back to her. Honestly, there are times where I do wonder how I've come to deserve a sister like her. Of course, she'd go and say that I'm a beautiful person inside and out and deserve the best in the world.

    Everybody else seemed to just be ambivalent about me leaving. Maybe that's simply because I kind of sprang this on them last moment. And they also were busy working on investigating that Oscuran mage that is dumping waste in the Rawlinswood. Thorn was a bit surprised and joked that he should go to and wondered if his portal sword would allow him to cut a portal to there.

    Tomorrow morning I'll be up in Peltarch again. I talked to a merchant who has arranged for me to help guard a caravan in exchange for travel to Cormanthyr. I must admit I'm a little excited. I've rarely traveled outside of the Narfell region, and in each case it's never been by such mundane means. Tojan seems excited about it too. May Selûne's guard us in our journey.


  • Entry 87

    I don't think I can put to words just how bizarre my recent little trip was. Eluriel asked me to help her investigate something related to the goblins who have been disguising themselves as Divine Shield members. Her investigations so far pointed to some Thayan wizard. The wizard disappeared while visiting her lover. Said lover being a creature of the Underdark, a "Mind Flayer". I've never seen one. Barely have heard of them before. And all that people would tell me is that they are like men with squids for a head and can control people with their minds, or if that fails they crush foes' minds with the power of their own.

    We gathered and eventually five of us went to Oscura and then chartered a boat to find out what happened to that wizard. There was Eluriel, Aelthas, Fadia, Ronan, and Vash't. And myself, of course. The boat captain told us we had three paths he could sail for us, each with dangers. Option one had the Hive brood, Abby's brood. Option two was driders. Option three was… unknown. Sometimes ships make it through, sometimes not. Since I recognized the Hive, us druids having helped Abby before, we decided to try that path. Well... that worked out sort of. They attacked first, until a stronger one came who guided the rest to stay away. But she did ask we not return via the same path. Considering how nasty the fight was until that higher brood showed, we agreed.

    We got to our destination and boarded on a dingy to get to the cave entrance. As soon as we stepped off the boat, we found ourselves in... A desert. No cave behind us, just a desert with a hot sun and the hell with making sense. We walked around and got attacked by various creatures, the most numerous being werecats. It hurt when the werecats were killed. Maybe because I'm one myself? At one point I even felt a bit disoriented by the heat. It felt so real, yet made no sense. We all started to wonder if the Mind Flayer somehow had a hold of our minds and we were in a dream. Especially when the desert vanished we found ourselves in a cave.

    In the cavern, we crossed a bridge which led to a tower of a strange design. I don't think I have ever seen anything quite like it. Not the material, not the patterns. Inside, we found much of the same. We were attacked by these strange little creatures the others called Mind Eaters. They were like Magic Eaters but ate minds instead? I also happened to fight Magic Eaters for the first time. They were ill timed, I had just cast spells on myself. And they just pulled the spells right off me, getting larger as they did. I did examine one of the bodies after and found a crystal growth in it. Ronan later confirmed what I thought. I had a spell crystal, a perfectly formed one as well. I hope to have Rith put a Death Ward in it for me. We also encountered this strange plant creature that lashed out at us with rope-like vines that grabbed tight and pulled us close so it could try to eat us. None of us were seriously injured, thankfully.

    Things took a bit of a turn for the worse soon after. Ronan suddenly became very certain and convinced that we all weren't real, that it was just a dream. Now, I have to admit, I think the same thought crossed all of our minds, but he really took to it. And then turned into a Balor. He ended up attacking us and probably would have killed somebody if he didn't turn back into himself after a few minutes. Aelthas was sure that Ronan wasn't real. And then we saw a familiar Red-Haired Devil appear and disappear several times. We all felt confused and tired, and unsure of what was real or not, yet we kept going. Upstairs we found a locked door. Eluriel fiddled with the lock as the others got ready for a fight. I was around the corner waiting since there wasn't room for me to stand with my comrades. I am so very, very, very glad that I was not around that corner.

    Inside the room was the wizardess, alright. And her lover. The rumors were true. Her lover was one of those Mind Flayers. And we caught them in the act. I was the only one who didn't see it. At least we did get some information from the wizard. Seems it's another wizard in Oscura who is the problem. He's got some kind of teleportation device that he uses to dispose of waste from his experiments and that's what we are having problems with.

    The Mind Flayer was kind enough to teleport us out of his home and back to the ship. We returned to Oscura via the drider path, which wasn't too nasty of a fight. Back to Peltarch and to Norwick for me after that. Glad to be home. And very glad I am not mentally scarred from our trip.


  • Entry 86

    Uljas is back. And the first thing he does of course is pick me up. Hah! I suppose it's good that Jerrick wasn't there. That's fine though, I did tell Uljas that Jerrick and I are together. He's happy to hear that I'm happy.

    After spending some time with Uljas, I ran into Rith, Troff and two felines. Druid felines, Fadia and Adriell. We had fun talking, eating some food by the south gate, listening to Aramuil drone on and on and on… At one point, somebody came to Rith and I and asked to help take care of a ghost wolf who wandered into the hobgoblins territory. We took care of it and made sure others weren't getting too close. After we returned to town, we found some people were brought back to town, killed by goblins. And another person mentioned there was another lass in trouble out in the woods west of the lake.

    I know I make Rith very worried when I ran off. Simply put, I'm a guardian of these woods. Especially in a section of woods that is so near to my den. Sure enough, we found a dead body there. I knew it would be too late, but... I still had to try. Sune was a kind goddess though. Rico, that Sunite fellow had tried to protect those people by covering their escape. Unfortunately, none listened to him when he told them to run. Sune decided to show that she at least approved of his actions by bringing all three of the fallen back. It was nice to see there was a happy ending.


  • Entry 85

    Rith revealed something about herself yesterday that I really didn't know before. Well, she did mention before that she was once held captive by the drow for a year. They tortured her… Made her blind. What I didn't know before, is what other tortures she went through. So she decided to tell me and Fadia, because she wanted us to know why she finds it hard to be with others. I mean be intimate. Even be asleep with another.

    The things she's been through, and yet she's strong and full of life. She's so optomistic. So... "Sunny." Everything bad that happened in my life just seems to pale in comparison to what she's been through. And yet she has pulled through with a grace that I could never match.

    For some good news, Jerrick is finally back. It was such a relief to see him. I know I've been getting antsy without him. He's quite tired from the trip, which is no surprise. And his ear has a nick in it. I'm not sure how I feel about that. I mean, I'm glad that it's only a nick. But it makes me wonder what happened.

    He's back though, that's the important thing. I was running out of ink after all. I almost had to switch back to the pixie ink!


  • _~Interlude~
    ~Pixie Quest 3: The Sparkly Lion Tamer~

    Tojan watched as her pet finished finished putting on her black armor and tossed on her cloak. Even though the armor was not as form fitting as her old green and black leather suit, Tojan noted with pride that Dark Kitty still managed to look very pretty. She noticed that her pet's hair was a bit longer; was she trying to look more like Sunny?

    "I'll hopefully be back by nightfall, Tojan," the half-elf called back as she turned to Tojan. "Tawny's been looking a bit stir crazy. Maybe you could play with her some? I'm sure Sunny would appreciate it."

    "Sure, no problem! Anything for you and Sunny," Tojan replied.

    Dark Kitty picked up her belongings and left the Fuzzy Den with a wave back to the pixie. Tojan fluttered in the air for a moment after and then her smile faded. She liked Tawny, as she liked all animals of the feline kind. The cub was adorable and had a lovely golden fur coat. Tawny was also a young cub who was very playful and energetic. She loved to pounce. That by itself would be nothing, except that she was bigger than the pixie… and will only get bigger.

    "Oh, the things I do for my kitty."

    Tojan flew over to Sunny's room and slowly opened the door. She landed down and peeked around the corner. Over on the plain bed, the pixie could see a little lion tail haning over the edge. Gaining a little confidence at the possibility the lion cub was sleeping, Tojan tiptoed into the room and slinked over to the bed. The tail swayed from side to side for a moment, and then hung still. Tojan fluttered her wings and slowly lifted herself to the top of the bed.

    Tawny lifted her head up, and looked over to the pixie. "Mrrrawr?" she inquired curiously.

    "H-Hi, Tawny. I guess you're awake, huh?"

    "Rrrawr!" the lion cub happily exclaimed and lept at the pixie. Poor Tojan barely had enough time to squeak out a cry for help before the cub crashed into her. Both pixie and cub went down to the floor with a thump. Tojan opened her eyes to see a triumphant Tawny standing over her with one paw pinning the pixie to the floor.

    "Ow. I hope you're satisfied."

    Tawny replied with a happy purr.

    
"You're too slow, Tawny! You can't catch me!" Tojan buzzed around the room laughing back at the lion cub who was chasing her. She had to admit, she was starting to enjoy this game of cat and mouse... er, pixie. Unlike a mouse, Tojan had wings which helped keep her out of reach. She zipped around the bed with a giggle and looked back to her pursuer.

No Tawny.

"Tawny?" she asked worriedly. The pixie stopped and hovered just above the ground. She slowly turned around, trying to find where the lion cub went. And yet, she didn't see Tawny anywhere. She scratched her head and called out louder for the lion cub. Tojan started to worry now, as there was no answer. Sunny and Dark Kitty both would be upset if Tawny got hurt, the pixie knew. She was sure even Violet wouldn't be happy at her.

A happy little growl called out behind her, prompting the pixie to turn around toward the bed. "Tawny! You had me worr-" The rest of her sentence dropped unfinished as she saw a leaping lion sailing through the air at her. "Oh, fudge," was all that she could say before getting a faceful of lion paw.

    Tojan floated high in the air, nursing her bruises. Below her, the lion cub paced around and looked up at her expectedly. While Tojan had fun when Tawny was chasing her, it was most certainly not fun to be pounced. It was especially not fun to have been pounced for the sixth time. "That cub is getting smart, I'll say. Smart and smug. I gotta do something to put her back in her place. I am not a cat toy!"

    She thought, and thought, and thought. A devious idea soon came to mind, and the pixie grinned mischiviously. She looked down at Tawny, who gave cute little purring growl back up at the pixie. "Oh, don't worry, Tawny. We're still gonna play." Tojan giggled and then vanished from sight.

    "Mrrawr?" Tawny blinked in confusion. She looked around wondering where her prey went. How could the big bug move so fast? She sniffed around the room, trying to find Tojan, but there was so much pixie dust in the air all around she just cound't tell. The cub walked about the room quietly. A giggle in the air made her perk up and bound over to one corner, only to find nothing. She heard another giggle and ran over to another side of the room and again found nothing.

    "Behold!" cried out Tojan as she dropped down from above. "I declare that I, the Sparkly Lion Tamer, shall claim you as my mount!"

    The pixie landed on Tawny's back, as a person would ride a horse, and grabbed on tightly. Tawny, jumped and bounced trying with all her might to shake the pixie off her back, but Tojan gripped her fur tighter and kept on riding. The cub bounced around for a few more moments until giving up.

    "That's right, you'll be my trusty steed and we will sally forth to cause mischief and mayhem for all who stand in our way." Tojan said with a giggle. And then with a "Yip! Yip!", she dug nudged her feet into Tawny's ribs. With a growl, the lion cub took off, running around the room while trying occasionally to shake the pixie off. Tojan still held tight and laughed harder, deciding this was a lot of fun. She now knew why Sunny liked riding on Fang's back when coming home after being convinced to stay.

    Tawny ran faster and faster, which was to Tojan's enjoyment. She giggled and laughed more as the lion cub carried her all over the room. They went around the bed, past the goblin skulls, through the books, under Kitty's old scratching post, by the shrine to the Moonmaiden, and back to the bed to start over again. Tawny finally had enough and started to run real fast.

    "Whoa, Tawny, I think you are going too fast. Whoa. Whoa! I said WHOA!"

    Tawny stopped in an instant, crouching on her front paws while kicking up with her back legs. Tojan lost her grip at the sudden stop and momentum flung her from off Tawny's back and flying right into the shrine. The pixie slammed into the shrine with a loud thunk, and then her world went black.

    
As she slowly regained consciousness, the first thing the pixie noted was that she hurt a lot. Nothing felt broken, but she knew she was going to have some nasty bruises for the next few days. Then she realized the ground felt awfully soft and comfy. She opened her eyes and looked around. She was lying on the bed, with two golden furred paws on either side. She looked back and saw the cub staring right back at her with a worried look in her eyes.

"Mrrawr?"

"I'm okay, Tawny. Thanks."

Tawny purred in reply and nosed the pixie as she set her head down on her front paws, being careful not to hurt Tojan.

"Yeah, I think we're done playing too." Tojan replied and layed back against Tawny and closed her eyes. Moments later, pixie and cub were fast asleep._

  • Entry 84

    So not only does the Dark Enchantress want me, but so does that necromancer, Quintin. For a different reason, of course, but it's still troubling. Rith had a talk with Lillia, and Rith and Fadia both were confronted by Quintin and almost got him. He underestimated the two. Wish he didn't get away, but we'll have another chance I'm sure. The two weren't in a happy mood afterward, when I caught up to them. Even Ronan had trouble getting them to smile (and his antics are usually good for a laugh or two, he's a bard at heart).

    And then Fadia noticed that was had a nice group gathered, counting Ronan, Sy, and Vash't. Good for an adventure. That actually seemed to bring some happy excitement. Fadia wanted to find a nice feline to copy the form of, and Rith loves to explore. She's often curious to check out new places. If she someday sprouted cat ears and a tail, I wouldn't be surprised. So off we went to Peltarch. We explored the farmlands west of the city, which see some trouble by feral cats. Fadia happily copied one of their forms, and then we decided to go further north to face giants. Fadia wanted to try to copy a manticore shape too. She wasn't able to copy the manticores, they (and we, I suppose) were too aggressive to effectively calm down enough to sit still. The giants posed us little trouble. So then we entered the ogre cave.

    That required a bit more effort from us. The front of the cavern is a huge open walkway through water, with skilled axe throwers guarding across the frigid waters. They guard the entrance and toss axes at any foolish enough to cross. Like us. After that, there was a long corridor with many flame traps scattered through, with some more ogre guards. From that point on, it was just ogre after ogre after ogre. We fought them just fine, but Rith kept charging ahead. I suppose she felt as if we weren't in grave danger… and maybe she really was just venting out her earlier frustrations.

    The cave was cleared out, so we returned to the surface and rith asked to see the orc lands. After a quick rest, we headed west. We fought a few orcs, but mostly ran into wolves of various types. Plain ol' wolves, worgs, big alpha wolves, trained worgs with orc handlers, winter wolves of varying sizes... We only found a lot of orcs when we went into a cavern. The orcs actually gave us some worry. Their mages loved casting that black tentacle spell. It's a nasty spell if you get caught in it. The tentacles grab you and won't let you go, squeezing with enough strength to break bones. Funny that a few of the mages got caught in their own tentacle spells. But again, Rith kept charging ahead, and it probably got us into a dangerous situation. She pulled back when we complained though.

    My own blunder in all this? I got curious seeing one orc's boots, they had nails in them at an odd place, I wondered how the orc could have put up with nails through his feet. As soon as I grabbed the boots though, some latent magic was triggered and I found them on my feet! And then the nails bit through. That <g>farking</g> hurt. I could tell there was some other magic that could be triggered, but I by then my curiosity had gotten me in enough trouble and I decided not to try it. I just wanted the boots off, but their magics kept the nails stuck in my feet. Sy asked his god for a spell to remove curses and that was able to loosen the magic that held the nails in place and I was finally able to take off those damn boots. Well, my lesson was learned. Don't touch orc boots. That and there's the saying about curiosity killing the cat…

    Rith felt awful about her behavior when we left the cave. I noticed she feels disheartened when she thinks she has done something to jeopardize trust in her. Fadia and I both tried to reassure her that it was alright. Nobody is perfect. Fadia was eager, too, with the manticores. And look at me, letting myself pick up cursed boots. She appreciated our words, but I could still tell she wasn't happy with herself. I guess, though, we all have our insecurities. Rith feels bad when she doesn't meet what she thinks are expectations of her. Jerrick seems to have a hard time handling rejection (not just in love, but from others). Myself? I think my big insecurity has been fearing my past would somehow catch up and haunt me. Not necessarily the Dark Enchantress reclaiming me, but I more fear slipping into the mindset I had while I was her pet. That's why I try so hard to be nice to people.

    Fadia, Rith, and I returned to my den, where we had a nice long bath. Rith also showed a present Fadia gave her earlier. A painting from Lucidious's old office when he was Chancellor. I remember hearing some rumors about the man... And the painting certainly did not disappoint. A woodland scene, with Fadia and pink-haired Penny both posing tastefully in the nude. Honestly, it was more tasteful than I expected, I think.

    Too bad Jerrick hasn't come home yet. He'd have probably found it cute if he had seen me as a panther curled up in bed with Rith and Tawny.


  • Entry 83

    That damn mad mage showed up again. Well, an illusion of him at least. He never shows his real self. Izakiel I think his name is? Apparently, some little girl illusion showed up too and taunted the mage. After both left, a number of us started to change into random creatures. Fadia turned into some kind of slaadi right in front of me. The hilarious change was seeing the Sunite turn into a succubus. Everybody turned back to normal after some time and nobody seemed to be worse off for it.

    After that, Eluriel asked me to try to use a wand with a polymorph spell in it. She wanted to turn into a pixie. I ended up turning myself into a pixie instead! Funny, now that I had decided I didn't want to be any other form than a feline, I turn myself into a pixie. I made the best of it though. I have to say flying around is quite fun! I think maybe I should try it again. I think next time I'll be more mindful of how long the effect lasts. I sat on Thorn's head to talk to him and the magic faded a moment later. I'm not a heavy person, but I can't imagine that felt good at all. I hope I didn't hurt him. He seemed okay.

    Horlamin found a lost member of his tribe. Or rather, I should say another surviving member. Up till now, I think he believed he was the only one left. She seems just as fierce as he can be, and certainly wasn't afraid to stand up to him when they argued about something. I don't know what the argument was about, but I could tell it was a tribal matter. He ended up slapping her and then that Sunite stepped in and got beaten down by Horlamin. I think Thorn was able to get Horlamin and the woman to at least see eye to eye. Rary couldn't help but make a few snide remarks about humans though.

    That bothered Rith, who confronted him and the two had a heated exchange of words. Rary proved himself to be a jerk for it. Fadia was pissed off. She cares a lot for Rith, like I do, and didn't like what Rary said to her. I managed to make both feel a bit better later at least. It helps that I make an adorable feline, right? Rith commented that I seem to be a bit recluse without Jerrick around. I suppose I am. It's not because I miss him (which I do, I miss his presense a lot). And I defintely don't mistrust his motives (I know Jerrick and Jynai both better than that). I worry for him. He's didn't leave just to see Jynai. He left with a mission; stop her father. I doubt that will be an easy task.

    Fight Night was at the Legion Tower instead. I don't exactly know why, but it was still fun. After the festivities, Rith nudged Vash and Fadia together. Vash had made some compliments to Fadia about her nickname given by Tojan (which is Violet by the way), and she found it flattering so Rith and I encouraged the two to spend some time together. Now to find somebody for Rith. Maybe Vash't?

    Sir Shannon then showed up with a couple of Helmites interested in Rith's investigations of Jiyyd. Helmites… Okay, yes, they are good at defending the weak and such, but I still find them to be too stiff, too formal, too stubborn, too... unfun. Kanen, I respected though. He had a bit of a sense of humor and could take a joke.

    So Benji and I decided to help Rith clear a path to the Helmite temple, as that is what the Helmites were interested in. Okay, Rith is good at demon-hunting, but frankly I am very much unsuited for the task. I don't have the weapons. I don't have the divine strength granted by faith. But she is my sister and I will be there for her. I assume Benji felt our similarly. He considers us friends and is willing to help as much as he can. So, what did we face right away? A glabrezu. Not quite as bad as a balor, but still a very deadly foe to fight. It shouted a word at me that left me blind and dazed. I couldn't see, I couldn't move. I felt tentacles rise up and crush me. My last thought before I blacked out was to hope Rith and Benji weren't joining me in death. I felt a sudden rush of energy flow through me, healing my crushed bones and restoring my senses. Rith saved me from the brink of death. I'll be saying a prayer of thanks to Lathander for her.

    We retreated to heal ourselves and had Sir Shannon grant us some further blessings. Between those and the fact that the fiend used most of it's offensive spells, we were able to eventually bring it down. We found little resistance after and the Helmites inspected the wards of the temple and made prayers to Helm. Apparently, the wards not only keep demonic influence out of the temple, but it's guarding something inside the temple. It's important enough that Helm does not wish the wards breached now. We left, but not before facing another demon, a hezrou. It wasn'tas bad as the glabrezu, but again I was hit by that damned word of power. At least I wasn't beaten down this time. Oddly enough, I'd have to say that fight would have gone worse if not for Benji. His crossbow was punching through the beast's hide like it was a pin cushion.

    Benji was a bit shaken up over the whole thing after. He explained later that the Legion tower was attacked when they went to fight the murderer, Jay. Underdark gnomes and some unknown army. He died in the battle, and was upset at Aelthas and Albry because they were there but seemed to just watch and not do anything. Honestly, that surprises me. I'll have to hear their side of the story sometime. Anyhow, I think our flirting of death in Jiyyd made Benji realize something, but I'm still a bit confused as to what. I think he sorted it, but I'm not sure.

    Rith and I decided to head back to my den for a nice long soak in the hot tub and some sleep. We found Fadia with Vash by Sam's Hole. Rith and I couldn't help but grin. And guess who else I ran into while heading south? Eli! I heard her voice and turned to great her. She was surprised that myself and one other person recognized her, and I could see why. She looked thin, too thin. I hope she's been well. She seemed concerned about something said between her and Thorn. I'm sure it'll work out though. Those two are siblings in spirit like Rith and I.

    Our long bath turned out to be quite short. Rith and I were just too tired. I only wish I was too tired to have nightmares bother me.


  • Entry 82

    My den is covered in grass. From wall to wall, door to door. Why is it covered in grass? And why is there an absolutely adorable little lion cub in my room? I came to find out from Rith that she was praying to Lathander and he decided to give her a sign. So he filled the den with sunlight and made grass grow. And gave the cub too. We let Tojan name her. "Tawny."

    I finally got Badger to tell me what happened with Jynai and how he came to be involved. It surprising to hear that she's a leader of her people. A queen basically. That was why she returned, her father was killing off her people. Why did she go alone though? Why did she not ask Jerrick or even me to help? Why leave us behind?

    I don't think she left because Jerrick mistreated her or such nonsense. And I don't think she left because she didn't love him.

    She did ask for Badger though. Like Jerrick, I'm curious why. I didn't bother asking him why she specifically chose him, I doubt he knows. They formed a plan to kill one of her brothers, who was helping her father. It involved giving one's live as a sacrifice, which Badger was willing to give. Jynai didn't want that, but she must have relented and accompanied him to wherever the sacrifice was to be. Mielikki intervened and let him live, though. And out of that, Jynai and Badger reached out to each other for love.

    I am glad to know that she found somebody. No, I'm not saying that because I'm selfish and want Jerrick. Alright, maybe there's a little bit of that… But more importantly, she deserves love too.

    I also found out that Ronan has an adorable snow leopard for a familiar. And it loves attention, which Rith was all too easily swayed into giving.

    The big thing that happened though, was Thorn getting abducted. He disappeared in front of my eyes in a cloud of black, acrid smoke. Tojan was able to find a stray hair of his, so Rith and Ronan performed a scrying and found him to just outside the Temple of Helm in Jiyyd, the prisoner of demons. The scrying came with a price though, it left Rith blind for a bit. That must have been hard on her, she was blind once for ten years, due to the drow. I wish I was with her when it happened, to comfort her. At least Fadia was there. Me? I was downstairs with Soliel waiting for the results of the scrying.

    The five of us set out for Jiyyd to rescue Thorn. We were joined by a paladin of Tyr, Chasen. Our plan was to get in, get Thorn, and get the fark out. Two sorcerors, two druids, a paladin, and one half-blind priestess. Not the ideal group for an excursion into demon infested lands. Thankfully, Rith's faith can turn demons like undead. We fought a few horrors, and various other demon spawn. They didn't hurt us much, but on the other hand it was hard to actually hit them. Either they dodged out of the way, or the armor would deflect our blows. The incubus and succubus were dangerous though. And then Ronan found Thorn... guarded by a balor.

    Ronan, Chasen, and Rith moved to distract the giant demon while Soliel, Fadia, and I planned to get Thorn. That didn't work out as planned though, because Rith tossed her "wall of blades" spell at the balor and almost blocked Thorn from getting out. Once he was free, I turned to see how Ronan and Rith were doing. And saw the demon plunge it's sword right through Rith. Fadia and I charged forward as Ronan flung more spells at it, he looked in bad shape though. Fadia went to see if anything could be done to save Rith while I tossed some spells at the Balor too. My magic fizzled as it hit though. Ronan's was able to strike the final blow and the balor collapsed.

    I ran back to Rith, fearing in my heart that she was dead. Fadia's a good healer, but that sword thrust had to have been through Rith's heart. But when I looked at Rith, I saw she was alive. Her armor had a hole in it, evidence of the killing blow. Yet her body was whole. She spoke of seeing Lathander, that he was pleased with her and chose not to let her die that day.

    I'll be saying another prayer to Lathander in the morning. This time one of thanks.


  • Entry 81

    Things have been mostly relaxing the past couple of days. Jerrick is in a better mood again. It's a relief to me. I hate to see him beat himself up over his past relationships.

    I will break that cycle, Jerrick.

    He had something he wanted to tell Rith and I so we all started to head to my home for a nice relaxing soak in the hot spring. Nicahh and Aelahearn wanted to talk to him also so Rith and I went ahead by ourselves. Fadia soon joined us and we had a fun time waiting for Jerrick. Fadia asked about Feather so I started to tell the whole story about Jerrick, Feather, and I. I only got half way through it when Jerrick walked in. I didn't want to spoil Jerrick's mood by continuing, so I'll have to finish the story later.

    Jerrick's news both was both expected and surprising. He told us that he was going to head to Cormanthyr. That I expected completely. What surprised me was his reason. It wasn't, "To talk to Jynai." He was going to there to kill her father and stop him from doing more harm.

    Yeah, Badger definitely needs to tell me what's going on out there.

    Rith and Fadia seemed shocked. Rith didn't want him to go risk himself. And while I'd rather he stay here too, I know he needs to do this. He can't live with the idea of letting a person he cares for suffer if there is something he can do to stop it. And he cares for Jynai very much. More importantly, I think, he needs to do this to give himself closure. Jynai left us so suddenly. No explanations. No goodbyes. Jerrick needs to be able to say goodbye to her. Hell, I do too, but with things as they are it's best I don't go. Maybe after I'm fixed.

    At the very least, she's getting a letter from me. I better do that now before Jerrick wakes up to leave.


  • Entry 80

    Next time Jerrick and I are in the bathhouse, I think I'll refuse to let friends drag us out. I've got the feeling this day could have gone better if we just stayed. Maybe.

    I went up to Peltarch for one of the few reasons I go there. The Dancing Mermaid sells my favorite wine, Silverymoon Ruby. It's not cheap, 31 gold a bottle, but it's sooooooooo damn good. Both of us, Tindra and I, love it. Much to my surprise, Jerrick was there too. And Rith. Fadia. Rasuil. Dash later. Crazy, eh? A number of us Norwickians up in the city. Jerrick asked if I'd like to go to the bathhouse with him. He needed a break cuz he and the others had a run in with a vampiress called Lilia (I think) and that necromancer, Quintin (the one who killed all those Damaran soldiers). And he smelled like he was toasted; courtesy of the vamp.

    We were having a relaxing time, he was telling me about the whole trip. Ran into the vampiress, who has an amulet that lets her walk about in the day, and had a rough battle and she got away. Then Quintin appeared, sent by some woman named Rhyla. She convinced him to try to get the amulet back for her? Something quite odd with that. I wanted to stay there in the bath with Jerrick. But Rith wanted to go into the Norwick crypts to follow a lead on vampires which she got from that same Rhyla… and Fadia was going too. Business before pleasure, as the saying goes. Right?

    So we headed back to Norwick. When we got there we started to recruit people to go into the crypts with us. While we waited, I pulled Rith aside because she wanted to talk to me in private. It was about Ronan and Jerrick. She noticed that I seemed bothered when those two fought. She's absolutely correct, it does bother me. They were very good friends, and now seem so angry with each other. We all were the "Suicidal Five", right? I miss that. Rith apparently talked to Ronan about it and he says he'd be willing to try to work things out with Jerrick, but that he feels Jerrick won't listen. And sadly, he's probably right. So Rith and I planned to work on that.

    But the crypts needed attention first. Have I mentioned I hate crypts? Really hate them. This trip doesn't make me like them any better. I fell through some trap door almost immediately after we entered. But I got stuck in the trap. Like there was one door up above which dropped me in and closed, but the second door that should have opened to dump me at my destination was stuck so I sat in that chute for a bit. I wasn't sure what to do. I'm sure Jerrick was going crazy, worrying about me. I needed to do something, I didn't want to stay trapped. So I made myself invisible and jumped on the stuck door. After a few times, it let open and dumped me onto the floor. Instead of being surrounded by undead like I expected, I dropped down into the middle of my friends. They had fought their way to the second floor to try to rescue me. I could hear Jerrick shouting for me. And by me, I mean Lorelai. I probably should be worried at a secret being let out, but... I'm not.

    The rest of the crypt was much as I dislike crypts to be. Full of undead. We even (after a long series of attempts) got that glowing purple door to open. And all we found was more undead, but no vampires like Rith was hoping. Some of those undead were really nasty though. Spirits that were obviously skilled wizards in their mortal lives. A big half-orc, Pugor, almost died to one of their spells. Lucky for him Jerrick was right next to him to heal him back up.

    It was after we returned to town that the day really went to hell for Jerrick. Badger wanted to talk to him about Feather, but Rith and Fadia weren't letting Jerrick be. So I turned into a panther and provided the perfect distraction for Rith. Fadia got the hint, I think and let the two guys have some space. I kinda wish we didn't let Badger tell Jerrick what he needed to. But then, I don't think there would have been ANY good time for Badger to. So not only is Feather in Cormanthyr (which Badger told me some weeks ago, I forgot to mention that here with all the other crap that has been piled on me)... but she apparently asked for Badger to go help her and the two ended up together. Like a couple. Like Jerrick and I.

    Jerrick didn't take the news well. I can't fault him, I'm not sure I would have if I was him. I mean... she left suddenly without a word, and instead of seeking him for help she called for another, and now those two are an item. So many questions run through my head; I bet Jerrick had twice as many. The biggest question for him, is what did he do wrong? I don't think he did anything wrong. And I think she did love him.

    This all showed me how much it hurts him, all his past relationships not working out. He's tried so hard, and they didn't happen. And then Ronan and Aelthas just toss salt into those wounds by saying he's not good for a relationship with me. I know they probably don't mean to sound so insulting, but to Jerrick... it hurts like a stab wound to the heart.

    "Damaged goods." That's how it makes him feel. Like a rusted weapon tossed aside for something better. Why would anybody want it?

    He's not to me. He never was "damaged" to me. Sure, he's a bit rough around the edges, but if you look closely, really look, you'd find a masterpiece under all the scuffs and scratches.

    And I want so much for him to see that.


  • Entry 79

    The day started off quietly. Maybe too quiet? I was sitting talking to Fadia, enjoying the peacefulness. Kinda dozed off, probably to Jerrick's disappointment. El started to organize a group to go out for some wood for her to work on. I noticed Rith and Jerrick seemed to be avoiding each other and Rith whispers to me as he walked away, "I think you should go with him."

    And that's when my instincts gave me that "impending sense of doom" feeling. Not "you're gonna die" doom. It was "friendships are going sour" doom.

    It was like there was this cloud of discomfort around Rith, Jerrick, and Fadia. Especially the first two. And then Soliel comes up to me while at the gate to talk to me as I waited for our trip into the woods to start. She didn't have anything surprising to talk about. It was the same "I'm sorry for the way I've been acting, I'm not used to people" story. After talking with her I noticed people left without Fadia and me. So I bid Sol farewell and we ran to catch up with the others.

    I'm not sure how they heard the North Gate alarms from so deep in the woods. They must have echoed just right. We all ran back to find gnolls attacking the town. It was a nasty fight, the gnolls had brought seige weapons and dropped rocks from the sky as they fought us. We drove them off though, with only one casualty on our side.

    After things calmed down, Rith commented to me that she thinks she hurt Jerrick. The two were definitely trying to stay away from each other, like they didn't want to upset each other more.

    It bothered me a lot. I hate seeing my family breaking up, over what I assume was something stupid.

    Rith didn't seem like she wanted to share what was the problem so I went to Jerrick. Except that I couldn't get him alone, there was Benji. And then Fadia and Soliel. Finally, I decided to just toss caution to the wind and asked Jerrick what was up in quiet tones. He didn't seem to want to elaborate either. I got the impression that she hurt him and vice versa over something. I still don't know what.

    I told him that he should talk to her, that she's upset that she hurt him and yet he just was stubborn about it. Compared it to El even, that if she wants to avoid him then fine. I bit my tongue, I really wanted to yell at him. But then Fadia came over, looking exasperated because Sol's been giving her the same "but you aren't my friend cuz you avoid me" routine I've gone through. So I kept quiet.

    And then that's when I decided I was fed up with it. I will not see a beautiful friendship ruined over something so inane! I flat out told Jerrick "Don't lose a friendship over something so stupid." Something like that, I forget my exact words. And then I told him that I will say the same to Rith, that I'm not just picking on him. And then I went to find Rith to do just that. I didn't get the chance. As soon as I found Rith and asked if we could talk, Jerrick walked over and did the same. I guess he took my words to heart. Thank Selûne…

    I let the two walk off on their own, and sat with Fadia and Soliel and waited. And waited. And waited. Benji and Val joined us too. What a test of patience, my curiosity was clawing at me inside. After a while the two came back, smiling like friends again and handed us all flowers. "Enough drama" I think is what Jerrick said.

    And that's when we all got silly. Us ladies dazzling men by imitating Val' "flick the wet hair back" move. Rith showing off with holding spells. Rith and I tickling an imobile Jerrick. Val making everybody invisible. All of us running around after each other. Jerrick turning into a big tiger and pouncing us. Me being a panther (which got me lots of hugging from Rith, naturally).

    The only one who didn't seem to be having fun was Soliel. I don't know why she didn't join in. All she did was whine and mope.

    After a while, Jerrick and I started to feel like playing "other" games, so we ran off. Mmmm, and we did have a lot of fun. That feather Rith gave me saw a lot of use.

    I thanked Jerrick that night. He wasn't sure why I thanked him, but I do hope he realizes the reason later. Family means a lot to me. I don't want to lose any of them, especially if it's over a stupid argument.