Travelling between worlds - Chea's Journal, part second.
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_Letter to Attentus.
Dear Journal,
i wrote a letter to Master Attentus, perhaps will have opportunity to present it to him - when we both reincarnate at similar age, when i'll be a little younger than him.
'Master Attentus - i've scried for Your past, Dearest - it is what my eyes saw, unbound by time's chains.
You are the one who was both cursed and blessed, with struggle and power, with torment and love.
You are also the one, who never was too far from my thoughts and from my heart.
Dearest Teacher, i admire your coherence, discipline and will in pursuit of love - my hopes are to be reborn as slightly younger than Your age shall be.
Then we can seek the light together.
– Chea Allin.'
– Yours, Chea Allin, a Witch-Student of Master Attentus & a Seeker of Enlightened Energies._
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_Skrying for Attentus' past, part 6.
Dear Journal,
Attentus and Wethrillina were always together, were busy together.
People often called her 'Lina', for short.
As a part of their romance they united two Arcane Guilds - Spellweaver Keep with Emerald Circle, in which Lina was a member.
He was Spellweaver Leader, and Lina served others as an advisor.
She was wise and philosophical witch related with unseelie, cold fey - she was Distant, Menacing, Seductive and Cold outside - but so hot as a White Star inside, for those she loved or cared for.
She mentioned that scary stone-and-metal fortress that spellweaver keep was should also have a garden, and Attentus loved the idea.
They had some private time for themselves as well.
Other times they enjoyed presence of others, did some politics, involved themselves in arcane and political circles.
This was a romance with great meaning and with great style & company.
They had few friends, closest was 'Klaz' - a spellsword named 'Klazaroth Stormrage', a black sails leader named Deacon Sterr, and a warrior Talgrath Caldassan with his pixie friend.
Wethrillina liked to help tormented people, to solve their 'puzzles' as Attentus called problems that bothered them.
Klaz was a 'complex puzzle' by Lina's words.
Attentus could do anything for her, and when she was lost behind arcane portal - he ran to rescue her disregarding completely all of posiible dangers.
She was rescued.
Other time he admitted to her that he craves power to protect her, and she was impressed.
She understood him without words, and was modest, cautious, eloquent, loving and gentle for him, despite being sinister, dangerous and fascinating witch.
Her manners were without fault, she was elegant and not too formal when compared with Attentus.
Her words and touch of her blue skin were like heaven's caress.
Attentus loved her more and more each day that passed.
Their romance lasted for about a year, then she left him.
Attentus could not accept this at first, but she was gone.
But thanks to this romance worst of his emotional scars were healed, and eventually came to terms with himself and moved on.
– Yours, Chea Allin, a Witch and a Seeker of Enlightened Energies._
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_Skrying for Attentus' past, part 5.
Dear Journal,
… i did skry for more of Attentus' past, and i learned as follows.
After his vision and return to society, Attentus was still in deep emotional pain.
Ruri's Heartstone blessed with love protected him from Vrock Demon, who started to avoid Attentus - but torment was still in his heart.
Later Attentus learned that Vrock hid in the Depths below Gypsy Camp's broken earth, where shadows served him.
It took years of compassion practice by Attentus, before the demon was fully defeated by Attentus, however.
Years passed, Attentus fled from life and engaged himself in Arcane Pursuits of Spellweaver Keep, advancing in ranks until he became Overseer, then the Leader, the Keeper.
When new mage appeared in the area, Attentus greeted her or him, showed and explained Spellweaver Keep, and sought romances from attractive witches.
But he couldn't find anyone whom he could love until he met Wethrillina Aeliath.
A witch banished from Norwick by a high-ranked Norwick Militia, a Barbarian named Uthger. They made her leave with swords bared, and torches in hands.
Attentus met her, and they cautiously exchanged their life stories, as time passed, as meetings came.
Both wicked and cautious, they both attempted seduction, tried to entrap other one under them.
Both fell in each other's traps, this romance could not be otherwise.
Attentus was still scared of revealing his emotions to Wethrillina, fearing that he will be left after showing that 'weakness' - but it was him who had to make first step, as he was a male.
Attentus arranged for revoking the banishment, as the Head of the Spellweaver he had that power in Norwick, anyway.
Then during a Norwick Faire, Attentus' elven friend, Evelyth Miliatani, sang a song that encouraged him to let woman have upper hand, to 'let her under his skin, then to begin to make it better'.
He offered his heart to Wethrillina Aeliath and she accepted his love - they started to be a couple, and even kissed each other passionately at fair's end.
Attentus torments were supressed by the new love, powerful, beautiful and true.
... i'll leave the nicer details for next time, Dear Journal.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Witch & a Seeker of Enlightened Energies.
-=- Wethrillina Aeliath. -=-
-=- except that being a Witch of the Unseelie Fey, she had a light-blue skin. -=-
-=- … a heaven's caress. -=-_
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_Tower of Love, a Den of Power.
Dear Journal,
… i had unsettling dreams,
... in my dreams i had a vision of a Tower, in which Beautiful Women of Power offered Love.
Tower of Love is a great Spiritual Challenge, for those who dare to enter.
... it's easy to annoy all women of the tower, by loving improperly.
... Tower is a symbol of Catastrophe, of Ruin in TAROT, Divination Deck of Cards.
... it's not easy to emerge victorious from that Test, but those who succeed will advance in Spirituality & Love, will achieve Great Success through many lives.
... Those who fail, will have their Karma Ruined for many lives, as well.
... i had insight that i'll visit the tower to serve there after many Reincarnations, as well - and won't fail the Test for Tower's Staff.
... had insights that many of our friends, including Attentus & Liliana will pass the Tower of Love's Challenges as well.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Witch & a Seeker of Enlightened Energies._
–
(EN) 'Tower of Love, a Den of Power' = (PL) 'Wieża Miłości, Siedliszcze Mocy'.
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_There's no Picknick.
Dear Journal,
There's no excess food or frivolity, only cold discipline.
When i sit at cold in Ashald Park, for mornings, nights and mornings i think of flowers, poetry, beauty … of fountain and nice gardener that is a little too wild.
... it's not like when i sat before Triad's Temple, no such stiffness or remorse.
There's calmness and ethereal amaze, spirituality different way.
Such are women artist spiritual chores, men rarely understand what we do.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Selunite Witch & a Seeker of Enlightened Energies._
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_Efflorescence.
- Ashald Park's morning. -
Dear Journal,
i spent a night in the Ashald's Park, thinking about a poem.
'efflorescence dew
fluttering upon motionstears of beauty fall.'
Efflorescence is such beautiful word, it refers to erotics, love, flowers, flowering, scents, night, light and scene.
Night & light come from associacion with Nitescence, a rare word for 'glow'.
i should use such beautiful words in my poetry as well.
'Oh, hearken Beloved, how the Night softly treads'.
– Yours, Chea Allin, a poetry-inspired flower-admirer._
–
Credits for the poem: Poetic T.
Source: https://hellopoetry.com/words/efflorescence/ .Credits for: 'Oh, hearken Beloved, how the Night softly treads' to Baudelaire.
http://criticism-for-art.blogspot.com/2018/03/baudelaire-meditation.html
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_Dragons.
Dear Journal,
What is Dragon?
Dragon is symbol of Fear, therefore any monster, even human monsters, are dragons in a way.
As one defeats dragon - either internal or external - one becomes a dragon as well, in a way.
… is it a defeat?
When one defeats a dragon to protect, because of love - one's loved ones offer reconcillation, it's a victory not a loss.
By defeating Dragons, great treasures can be obtained - either in coin or at least in Wisdom, Power and other Non-material Values.
The greater dragon defeated, the greater treasures obtained.
Befriending, taming a dragon is also a victory, probably the best of a kind.
Befriended Dragons are powerful Protectors, they are symbols of Magick & Protection.
Myself, i struggle with Esoteric Dragon - the Challenges related with Spiritual Pursuits.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Witch & a Seeker of Enlightened Energies._
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_Elements & Symbolism.
-=- Brazier-Fire & Rain-Water. -=-
Terrible thing happened since i wrote in You, Dear Journal.
Lady Elisa Horgath was murdered, while i was struck with severe fever.
Cerulean Investigation stalled with me being ill, then murder happened - in Ashald's Park.
… but i try to not think about this, to not drag myself into despair - in such state i won't be of help to anyone, anyway.
Dear Journal,
Tonight had enough of strength to sit at Mermaid's Patio and ponder about Elements.
Attentus' main element was Air, associated with his Athamé, magickal tool for directing Arcane Energies, with Information, Communication & Masculine Thinking.
My main element is Water, associated with Intuition & Feminine Feelings.
These two elements are most important for us - and these form Mist together, holy spiritual form.
Dear Journal, as i sat by Mermaid tonight, i've experienced Fire from nearby brazier & Rain-Water from the skies mostly.
Together these form Steam, a masculine-feminine feelings couple.
Earth & Air is Dust together, a masculine-feminine thoughts couple ... and when one compares spiritual journey to the road, dust can be seen as experiences & wisdom accumulated during travels.
Water & Earth is Mud, feminine feelings & thoughts, swamp-mud conditions is where Lotus Flowers grow. Difficult conditions of the swamps are comparable to difficult youth many girls have, and Lotus Flowers reach Perfection & Beauty while growing in these. Lotus Flowers are symbols of feminine Perfect Qualities, and more.
The Four Elements are bound together with Spirit, that makes them holy, that makes them whole together.
... tonight i've played with these thoughts, pondering for use in my Art of Magick & in my Poetry.
... hopefully my illness will pass away soon and i can be useful once again.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Witch & a Seeker of Enlightened Energies._
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_Skrying for Attentus' past, part 4.
Dear Journal,
… after a break i did continue to skry & pry, learning about Attentus' & Ruri's tragic romance.
On her trip East, Ruri was cursed by her enemy, she barely fled - or was allowed to flee, to suffer more.
It was a touch spell that landed on her left arm that at first did nothing, then resulted in paralysis & pain.
Attentus with Ruri tried Remove Curse spell, but the Curse was too potent.
Natural medicines didn't work either, and Ruri suffered more & more each day.
It was excruciating experience, the pain that Ruri felt, and Attentus suffered with her.
They had their love rekindled for a while that eased the pain at first, but after a time her personality was affected as well - she could not feel emotions, nor love.
Attentus in his desperation went to a secluded place in the Nars Pass, near a Brigands-built shack, and opened a portal to Hells despite his little skill in Magickal Ways.
Demons of Hells compensated for his little power, and completed the Portal-Opening, taking his invitation as their advantage toward this goal.
Portal to Gray Wastes opened, and Attentus had a glimpse at the Blood War, the War between Demons & Devils waged across the planes.
He saw Devils & Demons killing, blood spilled, screeching echoes as vultures & bird-like Demons fell from the Red Skies on lesser Baatezu.
One of the Bird-Demons, a Vrock detracted from it's course and passed through portal to face Attentus.
Bound by a Pentagram - Binding Rite, Vrock negotiated release terms with Attentus.
Attentus wished to learn about Ruri's curse & about a way to remove it.
The Vrock Demon told him that she was infected with Cursed Slaadi egg, and that she's transforming into extraplanar creature to be tormented in that form for Eternity.
Whether the words were true or not, Demon was released and Attentus ran back to Norwick, searching for Ruri.
Crying, out of breath he met her at the Spellweaver Keep's courtyard and did something that deeply hurt him for many decades of his future life.
He met her, she was transforming already - sinister energy field around her, bloody-sinew-menacing wings sprouting from her arms, her hands ending with claws, and burning-red-eyes looking at him with hatred.
He cried 'i am Sorry!!!' & shot Ruri with a Lightning Bolt spell, to kill her before transformation completes, to save her from fate worse than death.
Then he felt on courtyard's cobblestones, in pain & tears.
His friend Delawen, a mage-girl of Norwick, appeared and tried to comfort him - he yelled at her and fled from her presence. He wished no contact with anyone.
Living in seclusion of Rawlinswood, he was tormented by Vrock Demon who appeared again and again, Attentus' Lightning did nothing to harm him.
Attentus' magical power was just too weak.
He suffered desperation & emotional pain for weeks or more, then had a vision. Ruri appeared before him, dressed in a grey robe, surrounded by light.
She told him that she's still dead and now a 'Keeper of Afterlife', that she was spared from torments by Attentus' sacrifice.
She wanted to say goodbye, and to give him parting gift - a green-metal ring with floral ornamentation, made of her essence, that would protect him magically, and remind him that he always has a place in her heart. Ring was named 'Ruri's Heartstone'.
This was last time Attentus saw Ruri, his pain lessened, and he somewhat recovered after this ordeal.
His hair went Grey from shock & suffering he endured ... but he returned to Norwick & Society, continued his life.
Probably he continued to live only because Ruri wished him to live, even if living for someone is more difficult than dying.
... this concludes this scrying's part, Dear Journal - i do not know when i'll continue.
... i need to think & recollect, to ponder & meditate as well.
... i have Cerulean & Selunite chores too ... but eventually i'll find time.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Witch & a Seeker of Enlightened Energies.
-=- Attentus after his hair went Grey. -=-_
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_Skrying for Attentus' past, Part 3.
Dear Journal,
… after a night's sleep, i woke up, went south to skry a campfire i mentioned earlier.
Next to campfire i could not find these energies i suspected ... confused started to ponder, then found answer.
Old Norwick was elsewhere.
After Ostromog's Bugbears destroyed Old Norwick, settlers rebuilt it to north, leaving Old Ruins behind.
Went south, visited a famed Norwick's Well, that during Attentus' times radiated wild magick.
... it turned out that under it were tunnels where one of the three Control Orbs was hidden.
... controlled telepathically these Orbs were keys to controlling Old Narfell's constructs & artifacts that still linger hidden in remote places of Narfell.
... these Orbs were dangerous to use, and radiated with wild magick.
Then i went south to Lake area, and found three Menhir Stones, by which old campfire was set-up.
These Menhirs were nodes in the Ley-Line Network studied by old Spellweaver Mage, Isaac Hamilton.
... cast skrying spell, did a rite and after a while thoughts & visions flooded my Thrid Eye Chakra, so i learned of the past.
Attentus was a village boy who heard voices of long-dead people, other villagers were scared & non-trusting him.
Then a Mage named Versutus visited village, charmed Attentus' parents, then bought the boy for gold - argumenting that boy will learn how to wield his Arcane Gift, so it's no longer a curse, that he'll have better future under Versutus' tutelage.
Attentus followed his new Master to his Tower next to Waterdeep ... where Master made him forget most of his past with a spell.
Training lasted 15 years, and for first 10 he had no contact with other people except for his Master & occasional tower-guests.
First 5 years were most taxing & dull - it was mostly cleaning laboratory & other chores for Master, as he was taught discipline, philosophy, diplomacy, languages, and other mundane abilities as well as meditation, he was prepared to awaken & wield his powers that way.
Then his Magick Awakened, and for the next 5 years he was taught Arcane Theories, spells & rituals, mostly.
Last 5 years were interresting - he interacted with other kids at his age, both boys & girls. They played together, competed, learned together - spent almost all of their free time together.
They used their spells irresponsibly, as with one play - when they charmed each other, and left with feelings hurt.
Attentus had a few of shallow romances during that time, but he didn't feel the True Love until he met Ruri Hasegawa later.
After 15 years of training, he passed a Test designed by his Master, proving he's worthy of the Mage title.
Soon after he left Versutus' Tower in search of Old Narfell Artifacts, to forge his promising future elsewhere.
Ruri Hasegawa came from the Eastern Land of Kara-Tur, from an Island of Kozakura where people had yellowish skin, angled eyes and different culture than the Western World.
She was raised in an Arcane School, where they were taught Shadow Magic & other skills.
One night her School was attacked by a Rival with his soldiers, almost everyone was massacred, buldings & sacred texts burned to the ashes.
Ruri fled West, to Norwick where she tried to mimic local customs.
Wary of strangers, her independence, inner strength, pragmatism, modesty & caution were appreciated by locals, as were her beauty & grace.
Attentus & Ruri could understand each other more than most of other people could understand them.
Both Attentus & Ruri meditated, both were taught Arcane Lessons - Attentus focused mostly on Enchantments, Ruri - on Shadow Magic.
Their romance lasted for a short while.
... but Attentus - in his youth's folly - tried to control her, treated her improperly ... it was far below of what she was worthy of.
... his stupidity & ill manners resulted in arguing, Ruri made steps to break their relationship.
Eventually she even left Narfell area to visit her friend in East ... then after a long time returned - Cursed, Humiliated & in Pain.
When Ruri was away, Attentus missed her ... remembering her angry voice, accusations, feeling emotional pain.
... She taught him good manners that way, as he later told other women.
After Ruri's return, Attentus tried to apologize, to make up for his errors ... but she was not easily swayed by his immature words.
She could not hide her pain from him, however - so he learned eventually - and she needed that despite her independence & pride.
Dear Journal, this all seems hazy, perhaps i made some mistakes as i wrote.
... i need to rest more, then skry again, then i'll be able to write more & elaborate.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Witch of Light & a Student of Master Attentus the 1st._
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_Skrying for Attentus' past, Part 2.
- a Sail. -
Dear Journal,
… in a search for Attentus' karma & past, i've sailed south.
... followed energies & intuition past South Gate, past Old Ruins, to the Lake.
... as Nade, my panther familiar, protected me - i meditated, skried & pondered for quite a few of a night-hours.
...
When Attentus arrived in Norwick, he was short-haired, black-haired, 20-years young mage just after apprenticeship.
He left Waterdeep & his Master, Versutus, searching for Artifacts & Power of Old Narfell Empire.
His tools & goals included Arcane Politics, rising in structures of local Mage Guilds.
At first he was just another unknown person in area attacked by goblins & undead, where many of adventurers died every day ... yet still more arrived to replace them.
Foreign language, foreign customs ... mostly of barbaric nature, no one could appreciate a civilized, well-mannered Sorcerer.
His magick was met with mistrust by locals.
The area was very dangerous at the time, he had to make friends, to trust someone out of neccessity, for survival.
Then he met a woman from Kara-Tur named Ruri Hasegawa, and was enchanted with her looks & grace.
She had black hair to her neck similar to mine, wielded a simple wooden staff, was dressed in black leathers with metal studs, and there was mistrust, shadow, humility & sorrow about her as well.
Both felt like outcast, she was even more suspicious of strangers than he was, and Attentus felt need to be closer to her.
He hired Ruri as a bodyguard, this was his excuse for this reason.
Both fought goblins, defended Norwick & trained in neccessary-in-area combat skills.
Dear Journal, i've witnessed a few of tender scenes as they struggled for survival together.
Once they stood back to back, by the lake i was meditating & skrying tonight, fending off many waves of lesser goblins that surrounded them. Ruri had her staff, Attentus wielded a dagger - his spells were scarce & weak still. Then they limped back to town, both badly wounded.
There was no Maria's Tower by the lake at these times.
Second time, they guarded North Gate, on an elevated platform, with crossbows in hands, as dusk was setting in.
They were waiting for Vampires & other undead assault the town as night sets in.
There were many of adventurers on that platform & some on a lower position, by the gate.
... i felt many feelings of anticipation, of nervousness, feelings of sweat & fear, and caught a tender worry when Ruri glanced at Attentus that was separated from her, by some adventurers.
Thrid time, a glimpse had them both sitting close by the campfire at South Gate, along with other adventurers, chatting & cheering each other.
Ruri caught a mosquito that flew close Attentus' face, and there was more of life-stories-exchanging after that.
... i'll skry more on this campfire next time, Dear Journal ... as i am curious of these tales, as well as of early stories of Attentus & Ruri.
... for now i am weary & tired, and many feelings awakened in me, once again.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Witch of Light & a Student of Master Attentus the 1st.
- a Cast. -
- Meditate. -_
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_Counter-Skrying.
Dear Journal,
After a long time of no-use, my skrying abilities prove useful again & again.
This time it was counter-skrying.
But first things first, let's start from beginning.
… in the request shelf in Defenders HQ i found a note signed by Magistrate Shannon D'Arneau, a request to investigate the skrying attempt.
'It has come to my attention that Lady Elisa Horgath, believes she has been scryed upon in her quarters in City Hall. Her associate that noticed the attempt has not been available for my interview.
I would ask for a few things - firstly, that the Defenders in City Hall could clarify whether or not the quarters in which Lady Horgath is staying are private (as I assume they are) or public.
If preliminary investigations of quarters deemed as private point to a culprit that is indeed scrying...in this case, they are deemed to be trespassing under Statute 1.17 and should be thus pursued.
Contingent on private quarters, I would ask the Cerulean Star to launch an investigation into these scrying attempts and, should they prove to be legitimate, query the victim for next steps: further investigation and pursuit of the culprit or protection by magic to eliminate further attempts at risk of shorting an investigation.'
This note has been answered with:
'The quarters in which she stays in are indeed considered private property."
-Captain of the Kingsguard,
Baron Thom Tiller'After some arrangements i met Lady Elisa Horgath in Peltarch's Commons, questioned her, then made a mind contact as she imagined whole situation.
Skrying spell confirmed that she was in presence of a balded man, her business partner with tattoos on his head.
He felt something and cast detect magic spell.
i noticed in my vision a magical sensor, followed it and saw a shadowy silhouette of a human woman.
With more of time & effort, with luck & my ring i was able to sense her aura - she was neither good nor evil, neither lawful nor chaotic.
Then Lady Elisa lost her patience and spell ended.
i reported to her what i saw, she answered: 'I bet it's Maurina'.
After a short talk, i learned that Maurina is one of Lady Elisa Horgath's competitors, a sorceress that courts the King.
Maurina resides in City Hall, or even more often - in her own pocket plane, that's hard to reach without her.
As this is a delicate matter, i won't write an open report accessible to every defender in rank, instead i'll write a private letter to Magistrate D'Arneau, himself.
... i've painted my vision as well, Dear Journal.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, Cerulean Star 2nd & a Witch of Light._
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_Sharran Bandits.
Dear Journal,
My skrying abilities proved useful again, this time in a Cerulean Service.
There are bandits attacking merchant caravans in Nars Pass, wearing uniforms in colors of Shar, Selûne's & Mystra's Archenemy.
… but perhaps i'll just copy into you, Dear Journal, a file i posted in the Cerulean HQ's shelf of reports.
'Today i met a bard named 'Moody', we talked about Sharran Bandits attacking caravans using stealth tactics.
They have hiding rogues & invisible mages in their ranks.
Moody happened to have something of their remains with her, so we went to our Cerulean HQ to skry.
... i've performed a short clairaudience / clairvoyance Rite in front of our new skrying mirror.
Vision appeared, revealing a dark place, where they enjoyed meal, drinks, company & played darts.
i recognized that place as Shiny Coppers of Oscura.
They had guards protecting sleeping room.
Before i lost focus, before vision faded i noticed that they wore uniforms exactly same as those of Oscuran Temple of Shar.
if not my paperwork, i'd be able to investigate case more earlier, but perhaps i'll find time to follow these clues soon.
Sharran Unholy Symbol is in Moody's hands again, i returned it to her.
-- Chea Allin, Cerulean Star 2nd.'_
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_Skrying for Attentus' past, Part 1.
Dear Journal,
As i intended, i did.
i followed my intuition & flow of energies to a place i sensed as important to Attentus.
This was edge of a cliff, near Peltarch.
Cast my TAROT cards with a skrying spell and visions flew to my Thrid Eye Chakra.
i felt strong lingering emotional sorrow and noticed Attentus, a gray haired man that looked about 35 years old, yet felt internally older. He used longevity potion afterall, as i do as well.
He was presenting someone a place where he intended to build a house, using plans he made with his long-gone lover, Wethrillina Aeliath, a Conjurer Witch related with the Unseelie Court of the Fey.
In vision this part of land was hilly, and abadonned … it was past. Now it's surface flat, animals feast there, and there are nearby homes in neighborhood.
Home would have a nice look at shore below, but it was never built.
When Wethrillina Aeliath left Attentus, he lost motivation to settle.
He tried to love someone else after, but no one was fascinating enough.
i noticed one of a strong wish of his ... he was granted magickal power by Wethrillina Aeliath, to Protect her.
... one of his wishes is to Protect her & her next incarnations ... but i am not sure if he wishes to be with her anymore.
i'll help him to reach well-deserved power once he reincarnates, and let him protect her with his presence alone.
i'll Protect him from losing time on unwanted lovers ... i felt there's someone worthy of him, but probably won't be arriving in his lives soon.
This should help him reincarnate in Narfell, if done right.
... i need more complete wisdom of his life, goals, etc ... before i act, however.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Witch of Light & a Student of Master Attentus the 1st._
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_Search's Planning.
Dear Journal,
… after a meeting with Visage, Attentus' Raven Familiar, an amount of time did pass.
i was busy with Cerulean duties, mostly paperwork.
... in my free time i did help in Temple Lighthouse, at Shrines of Selûne & Mystra.
Tonight i had a free moment to sit in commons, to meditate & ponder.
... i think i'll start setting up conditions for Attentus' main incarnation coming with meditation & skrying.
... need to find important places, events, beings & items of Attentus, as well as his unfulfilled wishes - then skry these with my magick.
Once i have enough of wisdom, i'll act.
After death, there's time that pass before rebirth, time when mind-state of a being enters bardo, a state of 'in-between'.
Beings in bardo search for best place & time to reincarnate in, i do not know exact details.
... but often they carry on wishes from previous lives, and are attracted to places & times where it's most likely to fulfill these.
i'll try to advance Attentus' karma in positive way, so his main incarnation is reborn in Narfell again.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Witch of Light, a Selûnite & a Student of Master Attentus the 1st._
–
((in D&D FR canon, parts of bardo can be experienced as a visit in Fugue Plane.))
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_Avatars & Divine Forms.
Dear Journal,
There are worlds material & worlds spiritual.
Every Material Being has Spiritual Equivalents in Spiritual Worlds, there are Spiritual Phenomena as well.
At first, spiritual equivalents of material beings are called 'Avatars' or simpler - 'Spiritual Aspects'.
When developed in that direction, 'Avatars' can transform to 'Divine Aspects', false gods that are similar to Material Beings that developed in Spirit that Way.
There are Religions whose goal is to develop one's Avatar into a Powerful Divinity, then beings that cause them Ascend are their Priesthood.
Dear Journal,
… my insights tell me to Awaken Attentus' Avatar, to be Priestess for my Divine Spirit & for my Master's Attentus Divine Spirit, as well.
Even False Gods can be powerful, and they reward their Priesthood as they can, as they earn.
... in many Religions it's conidered blasphemy, act of treason against their Gods to serve & create other Gods.
... is every of Gods - False?
... i think Every God is False, even if they are Powerful, Wise & Compassionate.
... i'll do as i think of what people need.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Spiritual Witch-student of Master Attentus._
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_Spiritual Mistakes.
Dear Journal,
… i admit, as i progress in Spirituality i commit ever more errors.
People give me too much, wish to correct my errors so i adjust my way accordingly.
Then there's reaction and others come, adjusting as well.
... there's less of 'i' in 'i' as a result, i suffer again & again.
But ego reduction is a good sign, i think.
... perhaps i'll commit more of errors in future, probably i will.
it seems consequences will increase, i'll have moments of shine & moments of downfall as a result.
... where this leads?
... only time will tell.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Spiritual Witch & a Seeker of Enlightened Energies._
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_Attentus & Visage.
Dear Journal,
i met Visage, Attentus' Raven Familiar, she was flying near Temple of Selûne, Mystra & other gods i serve often in.
She's old, but still looks young & healthy … we talked for a while.
Attentus died of old age, when his longevity potion failed him - he aged quickly, turning to the very dust in just a few of days after.
Visage felt his life force flowing in, she absorbed it when Attentus died - it seems she will live very long.
She's karmic & magickal connections between Attentus' main incarnation & Narfell, a few of his lesser of these she detected in Narfell Already.
Perhaps his main incarnation will appear in Narfell sooner or later as well, as presence of lesser incarnations is a sign of main incarnation coming in future.
She detected traces of his energies, signs of his magickal & enlightening presence in Narfell, in various places, beings & phenomena.
i'll look for these signs when i can, perhaps he 'is within'.
He was quite ungodly mage, not fearing being placed in 'Wall of the Faithless' too much ... so his main incarnation went there for a while after his death.
He wasn't ungodly to extreme, he respected Mystra most of all other gods.
Now his Religious Wisdom is far greater, probably surpassing mine.
He's still challenging gods, as it's his mind, karma & nature to be independent & responsible that way.
He can skillfully & wisely deal with gods, often serving them to gain karmic advantage over them & their servants.
Visage told me to investigate word 'Immanence', 'Present within' as well, in not only spiritual context.
We agreed to prepare world for his proper return, we have lot to do.
We parted ways, but promised each other to meet again when we can, if we can.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Witch-student of Master Attentus._
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_To the Light (Chea's Dream).
Dear Journal,
i had a dream, strange & beautiful.
Selunite Priestess led me & Anheim with torch to a Dark Corridor, explaining that there's Light after a long way & many gates to pass through.
She would pass through adjacjent corridor with doors, reaching different destination, reaching the Chamber of Selune that she dreamed to visit.
She explained we'll keep a mind contact and cooperate, as progress of everyone depends on everyone.
She offered cooperation, Anheim agreed and i as well.
Her first door opened as soon as we agreed, it was apparently our first test. She entered and vanished in a dark corridor to right.
After a while of our meditation & wishes for her success, our first Gate Opened as well. Judging from a mind contact, her way was longer, even infinite - with many Chambers of Selune on the way, each another one harder to reach and closer to Selune. It was harsher test, as well and she was lonely in the dark.
Before we did pass through first gate, Anheim looked at me. i called Enlightened Energies for Protection, he did as well.
Then we were given permission to pass through first gate in Minds, and i spoke it aloud.
We passed, we were no longer in the entrance, but in a second chamber, with many doors. Plaque on the stand told:
'Loyalty Chamber, two person must pass through the same door, through the right door. Failure at either brings painful consequences, wrong destination corridor and dangerous delays.'
i meditated, got inspired and chose a gate, telling Anheim to trust me and go first.
He did without question, i followed, keeping my loyalty. Gate closed behind us.
Next chamber was 'chamber of powerlessness, we had to find traces of power there'.
Anheim was quick with answer: 'it's simple, three is number of Power'. 'Three', he spoke again, aloud.
Then a voice in our mind spoke: 'i passed through doors of pain & bliss, you can go on'.
Then a plaque on stand submerged into ground as with mechanical mechanism involved, and four stands with bowls arose, along with another plaque.
'Choose three elements'.
'i need mist to hide us while we are powerless, so it's water and air' i spoke.
'i need dagger' Anheim told.
'As with my Athame, the Dagger is associated with the element of Air - we already have this' - 'but we need earth for Pentacle's Protection, as well - until we find the way to exit. my intuition warns me that this chamber is deadly' - i added. 'so we'll lack the fire'.
We reached into bowls for elemental essences inside, then mist appeared blown by wind from holes in the chamber's walls … and water on ground froze. Plaque transformed magically to say: 'Chamber of Mists & Ice - without fire you'll freeze to death'.
We didn't know what to do, so i told us to sit, meditate, and wait for Enlightened Energies' inspiration & guidance. We looked at each other, Anheim shrugged at me, then did that. i followed, hiding behind his body from wind, sitting close. i wished him to hug me, but didn't dare to tell. He touched my knee with his, we sat as that for a longer while.
After a long time of losing heat & emotions in my dream, i woke up ... all cold on body, shaking.
Changed dress and went outside to see the sun, not knowing of what to think about the dream.
It seemed important.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Selunite Witch & a Seeker of Enlightened Energies._
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_Madness.
- Selûne's Symbol -
Dear Journal,
Selûne is goddess of light, the moon, stars, navigation, navigators, wanderers, questers, and goodly lycanthropes.
She cares for orphans & mad people as well.
In Peltarch we have a orphanage, we care for homeless, for orphans & for the mad there and at the shrine as well.
Personally i teach kids & older people how to read & write, it's one of my main services at the Temple, along with scribing, painting, copying & illustrating holy texts.
i try to be nice, but still there are people who wish me harm.
i often wonder how far i can go in self defense, when i can i prefer to not kill.
Other than offensive magick spells, i have tools that bring insanity - eye of madness & a horror robe that bring about various mental illness when used - from confusion to paranoia, overwhelming fear, among other.
Once someone is disabled that way, we can care for them at the temple - helping them to recover.
i prefer to not use such means when not neccessary, it's only responsible to be that way.
… but it's also responsible to protect weaker, using one's own wisdom.
... i think it's also responsible to protect those who are wiser & trusted authorities, even when they are more powerful, under their command.
Life is difficult, but one has to be compassionate & wise to the limit.
-- Yours, Chea Allin, a Selûnite Witch & a Seeker of Enlightened Energies.
- Eye of Madness. -
- Horror Robe. -_
