3. Diary of a Life Reborn

Diary of a Life Reborn


  • Entry 15

    Our time here has been interesting. I have cherished the time spent with Daddy. Many of his friends were curious to how he now has two daughters. He simply explained there was a magical mishap that lead to two of me, and left it at that. Nobody asked further. Still, I can see some are wary of us. I hear whispers of concern of souls and how could both Lorie and I have one.

    It is a valid concern, but I will believe that Mielikki solved the issue via the ritual. I must have a soul, for Rith was able to call to it when raising me back from my death at the hand of the hobgoblin's scythe months ago. I will believe Lorie has her own soul as well, though I hope we never have to find out.

    When not with my father or my friends, I have spent most of my time among the elves. They live in houses up in the trees, while the barbarian humans have settled in tents they have built below. I must say that I have loved the views from the tree houses.

    Not many of the humans venture up into the tree houses. Despite coming together, it seems that both groups still prefer to keep to their own. The barbarians are wary, especially as elves have an affinity for arcane magics. And the elves probably find the barbarians to be wild and crude. They tolerate each other, and leave it at that.

    However, I notice the youngbloods seem more curious about their neighbors, and perhaps this is where doors will open.

    I saw a few were taking archery lessons with the elves. The instructor was drilling his group on speed and accuracy. Nocking the arrow, drawing it back, aiming, and releasing… all in one fluid motion repeatedly. The humans were keeping pace by the end of the lesson, which I think impressed the instructor.

    I also caught a youngblood trying to impress an elven lass. I am not sure how well he did, as what may impress women in our tribe will not necessarily impress an elf. I suspect she at least found his attempt flattering.

    The only dark cloud in this has been quiet talks of the bugbears that are nearby.


  • Entry 14

    We have finally made the trip to see my father. I have been very excited for this. Even though I am in a different body, I had no doubt that my father would accept me. I admit I was worried for Lorie, she looked very nervous. Rith, Thorn, and Fadia came along with us to make sure we would be safe.

    We did have to fight some hobgoblins and bugbears on our way. Thorn and Lorie were able to lead us to avoid most trouble, thankfully. The trip took just a couple days shy of two tenday. The reason for it being so long wasn’t distance, it was terrain. The Rawlinswood can be very thick with trees.

    I felt my heart leap as I saw a familiar sight in the distance. We came to a clearing. The clearing. I sat down on the rock and reminisced of that fateful day so long ago. The memory of it all pounded in me, the events playing out in my mind again. The others seemed confused so I began to tell what I was thinking. Being brought in front of the Elders, that asshole accusing me of devilry, seeing my sorcery come to life without my knowing how it happened, running for my life until I couldn’t run more, wondering what to do and where to go, and finally asking Selûne for help at that very stone. The words just came pouring out of me without thinking about it.

    I dug out a moonstone and whispered a prayer of thanks to Selûne and left it at the stone as I came to my senses again. And found Lorie doing the exact same thing as I, and we realized that we even had been telling the story together. We couldn’t help but chuckle.

    We found the village ruins of my tribe easily enough. Almost nothing was left, like I had seen before when I tried finding my mother after the war with Sharn’s army. Lorie and I gave a small prayer to the gods for our mother’s spirit. Rith noticed movement and pointed out we were being watched. They were elves, and one broke off, bounding down to greet us. Daddy…

    He almost hugged Rith, but quickly realized she wasn’t Tindra. Then he saw Lorie and hugged her, happy to see his daughter. I wanted to hug him so much, but held back. He’d needed an explanation first. Daddy noticed me, realized something odd was going on, and so Rith began to explain my existence and who Lorie really was.

    I sat quietly, as did Lorie. I was simply waiting patiently, again sure he would accept me. But Lorie, again I was worried. I could see by her face that she was paralyzed by guilt and fear. Rejection would be like a knife through her heart.

    After he listened, he looked me over and gave me a hug. The hug I’ve waited years for. That of a parent welcoming home a long lost child.

    He then approached Lorie and gave That Look. I recall only seeing such a look from Daddy a few times as I grew up. I wonder if all parents instinctively know how to give such looks to their children when there is misbehavior. She shrank from it, her guilt and fear was evident, but he demanded her to look at him. When she did so, he asked her if she was all just illusion and lies, a fake life.

    Something seemed to well up inside her. Timidly at first, then forcefully, she proclaimed she was real. Different but real. Daddy accepted that, and hugged her, and I think we all felt a collective sigh of relief.

    Somewhere up above, I think Jerr must be smiling at that. He’d have been happy to hear her say she was real.

    Now we are at the village, which I’ll detail more tomorrow. One thing amazes me and lifts my spirits. The tribe is alive, living with the elves. They were not so proud to deny the offer of help to avoid being wiped out by Sharn’s army.

    Despite my childhood, despite the exiling, I remain true to what my mother told me. The tribe, no matter what, is family.


  • Entry 13

    Tamara is back to being in a happy mood. She realized that she does have things to be happy about and it's better to move forward. Good for her.

    I had an interesting adventure the other day. I had met with Moonie and some others and as we were looking about for some adventure. There was Elsbeth (a bard), Purgor (half-orc), and Labur (dwarf) all from the Legion. Also a robed fellow named Dart and a dwarven druid called Argus (who had stone armor).

    We did find adventure. An elven merchant had gone missing and so we helped find him. We tracked his wagon which was obviously ambushed and followed the wagon tracks to the ruins of Ormpur. In a nearby cavern, we found a large group of formidible bandits. They were well prepared and many of us almost fell several times. I know I had two close calls with death. We were triumphant in the end and rescued the elf, Himo.

    One of the items I claimed from the loot was this wonderfully drawn elven map of the stars. I wanted it to learn more about elves, many of the constellations were of religious context (as are most constellations among all races). When I showed it to Thorn, he pointed out to me that the map was more of a scroll, and that each constellation could actually call forth a spell! That was quite a lovely surprise.

    Thorn is very stressed. It seems Dondiah's friend finally found him. I'm not sure what the result of their meeting exactly is, but Thorn is still edgy about the whole trip he took. I think I'll feign ignorance if I find myself speaking with this Rhylin lass, if only for Thorn's sake.

    Eluriel was surprised that I did not have a Wolf fang on me. I suppose she has every right to be surprised. I am unsure if I am a true Wolf anymore, however. I do still share their ideals, of course, and will readily lend aid if asked. My troubling thought is that I do not feel the same deep connection I with nature as before. I no longer have the Call of the Wild filling me; it was from having been a werecat. I shall talk with some others and get their opinion.

    Rith will be scrying sood for my father. Lorie has offered a bit of her blood to help. I await the result with much excitement. Speaking of Rith, I have noticed that she seems to be taking a different approach to life lately. She has been more joyful, if perhaps overly silly at times. I suspect that trip to Suzail really put her at ease on things. She, Thorn, and I had a silly time in the Wolf Den yesterday. It ended with Thorn tucking me in as if I were his daughter with the promise of blueberry pancakes in the morning.

    The pancakes were quite delicious.


  • Entry 12

    Tamara is sad. She has had a rough life before coming to Norwick, very similar to my own upbringing. Shunned and outcast for being different. She told me nobody in her old druid circle really cared for her. She wants friends, family, perhaps even a mate to love. And though she did not say it, I expect she misses her wolf companion who was mauled by a bear.

    I am going to try my best to make her feel like she has a home here. She will be loved.

    Rith and Fadia both have been doting on me a bit. Rith gave me a elven ring of curing and one of those tracking scrolls, while Fadia gave me an amulet taken from the kuo-tao that allow one to see through invisibility for a time. I certainly do not mind gifts; I admit I am a sucker for attention. I just hope they do not feel like they need to give a gift everytime we meet.

    Speaking of attention, I decided to get a new outfit while I was in Peltarch with Rith. My elven armor is nice, but it lacks the sexy tease of my old green and black leathers. And the other outfit I had is also nice, but I really wanted something to show off in. In the end, I had a lovely ensemble created that mirrors my old tight purple outfit (the one that would make Andu blush brightly whenever he laid eyes on me) and borrows a few details from the "battle bikinis" that Lorie and her sisters have become famous for at Fight Night. The colors chosen compliment my elven nature, green and gold. The result, I think, is quite stunning. My new "Prowling" outfit. Now only if I had somebody like Xixia to "prowl" around with.

    On another note, Moonie is wanting to gather a lot of moonstones for a ceremony to celebrate Selune and then donate the gems to the orphanage in Peltarch. I need to remember to hold onto any I find while hunting the greenskins.


  • Entry 11

    I feel exhausted, even after having rested. The past day was full of terrible fighting, though I am happy that it ended with happiness and new friendship.

    I had met up with Gnarl and Romulus by the southern gate, both of whom wished to hunt goblins. Several others joined with us. Of particular note, there was an elven healer of Rillifane named Noli and a half-elven druid of Mielikki named Tamara. Both I have not met before, and Tamara seemed to be very new to these lands. She showed herself to be brave, yet not too reckless, and has a cheerful attitude. Noli proved himself to be an excellent healer, especially with events after our hunt.

    The hunt was went well. Rith had given many of us blessings of Lathander to protect us, and I think that helped make it easier to fight the hobgoblins. After we returned to town, Romulus, Gnarl, and I considered going back out with a smaller group into the Howling Woods. I wished to speak with Rith first, however. In hindsight, it is fortunate that I did.

    I did not have much time to speak with Rith, about performing a scry to find my father. Shortly after I told her that I did wish to accept her offer to aid me, the gate was attacked by goblins. It was a small wave at first, but it quickly grew to a large army. Many goblin grenades few about, and I was glad Rith's spell of elemental shielding was still in effect on myself.

    I tried best as I could to help fight the goblins. I kept to archery and avoided melee fights. But goblins were soon joined by worgs. And trolls. And in a lull, the ground shook. We prepared for umberhulks or bulettes to burst up from the ground, but instead a massive golem stomped to the gate. A "war machine". I remember seeing those dreadful things once long ago, the Eastlanders had some under their control. Gnarl unfortunately charged the thing and was crushed flat immediately.

    More goblins and worgs came. And more. And more. And more golems. Many times I had run back to the double-gates as the fighting came too close. There was even a hell-cow! Quite a few of us fell, including myself. This is where Noli had been able to put his skills as a healer to full glory. Of all those that fell, it was only Gnarl that he was unable to save from the brink of death. I have said a prayer of thanks to Rillifane for sending him to Norwick.

    When the fighting finally stopped, I took the time to talk to Tamara more and even pointed her out to Fadia when she arrived. Tamara was quite appreciative to be shown the Druid glen and it looks like she will be a new apprentice, as well as a new friend.


  • Entry 10

    Thorn has escaped the clutches of the Fuzzy Den. I guessed that meant Dondiah's friend has left, but he didn't know if that was so. He got out because he needs to be away from Rith.

    Thorn explained this all to me at a little spot he calls, "Gossip Rock." A cute name for a place to hang out and gossip. Rith is in love with him. She knows he cannot return that same love, and it pains her so he's giving her some room.

    He then asked how I was doing. How were people treating me? I told him about how the elves seem to treat me well (which I am glad for). And other people have been good friends. I told him of Kat and Syl too. He did not give me an "I told you so". I suspect he felt he didn't need to, I gave it to myself already. He is worried as well that I let myself be taken advantage of. I promised him I would be more careful.

    I think the situation with Kat and Syl actually worked out amazingly enough. Just as Thorn was to take me into the woods to train my scouting skills, we ran into Kat. She pulled me aside for the moment to talk, and confessed that she and Syl have become enamored by me. While I do admit I am flattered, as I said in my last entry remains true. I have a mate, and I will not turn away from him. She understood that, thankfully.

    I do believe Thorn was quite happy with how well I do handle myself in the woods. I wonder if I should join the Norwick scouts under him.


  • Entry 9

    Yesterday was very busy. I missed Fight Night, and most of an auction from an elven merchant. Rith waved me over; she was with Corwin and honestly looked a little tipsy. I could smell rum in the air. I must admit I am glad to see that even a stubborn priestess (I say that with affection) will take time to relax. After a few minutes, she noticed some of the elves give an odd look my way. It made her feel like they did not approve of me talking with her.

    I am unsure how I feel about that. I do appreciate the thought that the elves see me as one of their own. However, if there is one thing I will not allow myself to do is carry prejudice in my heart. I grew up the victim of that prejudice, and know how it can bring pain. I would have stayed with Rith, but she requested that I go speak with others. I think she felt uncomfortable and wanted to have attention drawn away from her.

    Ael’Que is one elf I suspect shares my view on prejudice (besides Thorn and Fadia). I noticed he is in a relationship with a half-elf, Lyda, who was enjoying the festivities with him that night. I have met Lyda before; she seems to be a nice person then and now.

    Kat and Syl were also there. I honestly feared that they would start playing with my ears again. Thankfully, they did not. Kat invited me up to Peltarch so she could give me some things that would be useful to a sorceress. I said yes without thinking, realizing afterward that I just set myself up for more trouble. Before I left, however, Ael’Que pulled me aside for a talk.

    He is quite worried that I am being taken advantage of. He had seen me at Peltarch the other week with those two teasing my ears. I could feel myself blushing from cheeks to ear tips when he told me. Even before talking to him, I knew deep down I was letting myself get in over my head. I need to keep in control of myself, and not just because of Ael’Que’s worries.

    The fact is that I remain Lifebonded with Andu’mein. I my have a different body, but the Lifebond is with the soul. I cannot and wish not to betray it.

    So I tried to excuse myself from Kat’s invitation, which I think they did not think was sincere. We were interrupted by an elven woman who asked frantically if we saw Rith. She mentioned that Rith was with Corwin and suddenly woke up and… well… freaked out. I had my suspicions of why this happened from reading Lorie’s diary. I was able to find Rith, back at Lorie and Jerrick’s house. I was a little surprised she was there; I expected her to be at the den. I was right; she had a nightmare. I do hope Corwin understands that she did not mean any bad words she might have said. I did leave him a note that Rith is alright and apologizes.

    Ael’Que took me to see where the Shesae are planning to build a place of their own. I must say they have chosen an excellent location, near the druids. It was nice to relax on the hill overlooking a waterfall, I think I needed some peacefulness.


  • Entry 8

    Dear Selûne! What did I just get myself into?

    Norwick was quiet, so I decided to visit the city. The city still makes me feel uneasy, but I'm not as uncomfortable as I used to be. It really helps that there isn't grey stone everywhere. I met some people outside of the Dancing Mermaid. One person, a human by the name of Kat, has taken a liking to me. In hindsight, I should have kept my mouth shut about ever having been feline. Kat follows Sharess and now wants to think of me as her kitty. But I am already "Thorn's elf." That did not seem to matter to her.

    I also met her sister later, Syl. And a fellow who took us on a tour of the sewers where we killed rats, zombies, cultists of some dark god (perhaps the Mad God?), a wight, and some giant cube of slime. That last foe was particularly disgusting.

    The problem I have now with Kat and Syl, is that they have latched onto the idea that I am a cat. That itself does not bother me, I still feel like a cat sometimes. Kat, and later Syl, tried to scratch behind my ears like one would when petting a cat.

    By Selûne… I was told that my ears would be sensitive. As a half-elf, I knew my ears were more sensitive than a human. And as a feline, it felt very nice to have somebody scratch just behind my ears. But as an elf? I really did not think I would find my ears to be that... sensitive. I could hardly think straight!

    I expect Thorn will be saying an "I told you so," to me.

    What am I going to do about those Kat and Syl?


  • Entry 7

    I ran into bad luck today. It started off very well. I went hunting goblins with John, Romulus, Gnarl, and a few others. Among the group was a man called Ezekiel, or Zeke for short. It took me some time, but I finally remembered where I heard of him before. Lorelai had written about the man in her diary.

    While we were in the ruins of old Norwick, Zeke had a seizure and began talking like he was having a vision. It was not the future that he saw, but the past. He spoke of battles with the drow underneath the town, of Phoenix members not returning and needing to be rescued, of a underground city named Arnath, of Braeth…

    We kept on with our hunt after he returned to the present. Goblins did not stand much of a chance against us. We ventured into the hobgoblins, which I have helped fight before. Things did not appear to be anymore difficult than usual. Looking back, I can only say it was simply bad luck. At one point, a scythe-wielding hobgoblin charged at us archers and seemed to focus on me. I started to leap to the side as I saw his weapon swing forward, but I could already see I was too late. Fortunately, I do not recall the blade bite into the flesh of my neck. His strike was true, I was likely dead before I even hit the ground.

    Rith pulled me back from the Fugue. I am fortunate that she was in Norwick to meet with my companions. They were all relieved to see my return to life. They seemed even more relieved when I joked in response to a comment about finding a lesson in this death. "The lesson being, 'Duck.'"

    I mentioned Zeke's visions to Rith, who already know of some of them. I do have some regret with telling her of today's vision, as it did bring back awful memories to her. She was one of the "Phoenix" trapped below. From what I've seen, she rose from the ashes well. I'm sure Lorelai would say so.

    That Zeke. I have a good idea who he really is after talking to Rith. I should find his old friends and pass on what I learned.


  • Entry 6
    I have changed. I feel it. I mean changed more than just my body, but mentally as well. It is a subtle change in my thoughts. The words I chose to speak with are not quite the same as before. I sound more proper. Maybe it comes with having an elven mind? And when it comes to combat, I find myself trying as much as possible to stay back and rely on my bow. Is it simply because I am no longer a werecat with a thick hide and claws?

    And just as I realize these things and wonder how much I will change, I find there are just as many ways that I am still the same. As I approached the southern gate last night, there was a man talking to Yngdir and La'ali. He mentioned having lost his stuff at the old town ruins and hoped for some help in retrieving them. Yngdir offered to help in his own way (By his words, you'd think he does not much care either way. By his actions, you know he does). Without giving it another thought, I also offered my bow and magic to help retreive the fellow's belongings. We found his dropped packs easily and were back in town within the hour.

    After properly introducing myself to the man, a Mystran priest by the name of Faide, I also met two others. One a Tormite named Pherdur, the other a mage named Mystic. Mystic had the desire to hunt goblins and other nasty creatures that infest the woods. Again, I promptly offered my skills, as did Pherdur and Faide. We had a good hunt and I very much enjoyed helping. And killing goblins.

    I may have some different quirks, but deep down, I am still me. I wish to help others, even if I am not strong now. I wish to see the woods safe, even if I do not have the animalistic connection now. Above all, I cherish friendships and the acceptance others give me, even if others do not understand why I am who I am.


  • Entry 5

    I took a trip to Peltarch. Being in the city still makes me feel uneasy, but not quite as much as I felt before. It helps that it doesn't have that grey stone look everywhere like it used to. I was thinking of having a new outfit tailored for myself, but I decided not to. I think I would like Fadia's opinion. Instead, I purchased some boots. They are nice and light, and I can move my ankle easily with them. They make me feel more sure on my feet as I nimbly side-step foes.

    I also was able to speak with Ama'bael and Therean. I was hoping to talk about the Elven gods with both, but instead I ended up talking about me. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, I have confused people with calling myself "Tindra." I cannot, however, see calling myself anything but that name. Perhaps Andu's surname instead of my own, but I will forever be "Tindra."


  • Entry 4

    I talked with Rith and Fadia about various things. They both wanted to make sure I was doing well, naturally. The two are in happier spirits, certainly. Rith did not mind my desire to find a lighter weapon, of course. She only asks that the longsword is not disposed of, but returned to her so that it may find another worthy owner.

    Rith was escorting me back to Norwick from the den when she revealed something that honestly surprised me. She has often told me that if I ever needed something of her, I had just to ask. I assumed this was Rith trying to be extra friendly to her "twin sister's" … sister. I am not very far off the mark; it is more than just that.

    "You may not think it," she said, "but I owe you a lot." The words surprised and confused me at first, and so questioned. She explained that she feels indebted to me because without my existance, there would be no Lorelai. It left me speechless. The thought certainly did not cross my mind before.

    We then ran into Thorn, who was extremely bothered by something. He asked if he could stay at the den. Both Rith and I were certain that Lorelai would not mind his stay. He explained that he wished not to be near town because of that trip he took with Dondiah. He only briefly explained it to me before, and I must say I completely understand his unease of it. It sounds like the lie could unravel, as one who they visited has followed.

    I wish I knew of some way to help, but this matter is quite well out of my hands.


  • Entry 3

    I have spent some time with Ael'Que today. I had mentioned to him of my desire to learn more about my elven heritage and so he offered to talk a bit about elves. We didn't delve into specific details much, but it was still a good session. He did tell me of two others who would be able to supply much information about the Elven gods. I already know one, Ama'bael. The other is Therean, who I am unsure if I have met.

    In other matters, I think I would like to trade my longsword for a rapier. It's not that I don't mind the quality of this elven longsword. I have used a longsword before, in my original body. I remember when I had won it. Damarcus, A'lan, and I were traversing the Nars Pass when we were stopped by this warrior mercenary that the Eastlanders had hired. Damarcus and A'lan exchanged words with the warrior, who had numerous archers closeby ready to shoot us. In the end, a battle broke out. Damarcus called on Lathander's might to strengthen him, A'lan called on nature's fury, and I became my ferocious werecat form. We three defeated the warrior and his archers and each claimed a piece of his equipment. The warriors fine longsword was mine to keep.

    Even so, I cannot say I swung the longsword effectively. I am not a strong woman. The only time I could claim such is when I was feline, and I am that no longer. I think a lighter weapon might suit me better, perhaps a rapier or a shortsword. I just hope Rith doesn't mind this decision; she gave me the elven blade. Perhaps I should tell her first?


  • Entry 2

    Today could have been better, but it could have been worse too. A woman was arrested today in Norwick for crimes in Peltarch. We do not know specifically what acts she has done, just that she's a traitor of the city. Eluriel did elaborate on some reasons why the woman, Liisa, should not be trusted. Despite that, Rico managed to get himself involved.

    I also tried to talk to Eluriel and some others about who I am and how this has happened. Eluriel already knew some of this though. She is upset at what Lorelai has done. I can't blame her. Hell, I doubt if Lorie's even forgiven herself still.

    So why do I forgive? As I've written before in Lorie's diary, there's the "would I have done the same?" thought. And, Lorelai really has become a good person; I doubt Rith would call her sister if Lorie had a dark heart. There's a better reason still, for me to forgive Lorie.

    I trapped her first.