3. Maya's Journal

Maya's Journal


  • Entry 26

    Have been talk to man named Gasun. Is mercenary captain of group with no name, and is also inquisitor to Barrim. I take to Jiyyd and try find out why not allow inside, but Elord not there. Then he want to know of Wan-tee from Rando, but talk to Uthgor instead. Uthgor say Wan-tee treat well, and seem have honor, but ask to mate with human. I try think about mate with snake person, and end up make face.

    I meet teacher Demi yesterday in Gypsy camp! Was so sad she not have time stay and talk, so hope very much she be around later. She was one who begin teach me read and numbers, and owe her much. Is one of best friend have. I miss very much. I hope she stay for while.

    Kalina was in camp too, and can tell is lost. Uthger gone, and think she miss him very much. When grow up, grandfather Bjearn teach to always speak true, and never hide behind words. Always do true thing, and never betray heart. Grandfather Bjearn very wise, and I try always live be his words. I wish everyone had grandfather like Bjearn. World be better place, full of honor and no lie. Best can do is be true to Bjearn words, and hope others see. Think is late for Kalina, but maybe see Bjearn words inside Maya heart, and want to do too.

    I have hope.


  • sheds a tear


  • Entry 25

    I want to write of Sam

    Sam used to be best friend. When first came to Norwick after escape from slave wagon, Sam help me much. He get me first good axe. He help with gold when need things, and give much advice. I always see stand on hill in Nars and fight off bandits. I always see run around from place to place try save people and fight for good. I call him “Hero Sam”. I still smile when think of.

    When I die fighting giants, Uthgar, son of Tempus take me into Hall of Heroes. But then Tempus show up, take me, I know I am his now, and both appear in Peltarch. Tempus make great earthquake and lightning, then disappear.

    I find out was Sam doing. Sam was very angry I die, and curse Tempus. Tempus listen, bring me back, then punish Sam.

    I was very angry at be taken from Hall of Heroes, from arms of grandfather. I was very angry at Sam, and almost come do duel. It take long time of thinking about this before realize should be flattered. Will be plenty of time for Hall of Heroes later. Friends only here short time…mostly. Sam and I reach understanding.

    Was until Tempus give me vision…give me vision become Black Dragon Knight.

    Sam and Koreth not get along. I work for Koreth, and Sam see as betray friendship. Friendship still never same. I know never will be. I am not young for Sam to mentor. Sam is older, and is Knight of Helm, god of make laws. Both Sam and Maya fight evil. Sam just do different than Maya.

    I see Sam now. Is true older, but not just in lines and scar. Sam is older heart too. Duty of god of law weigh on Sam heart. Sam lose many friend. Sam even lose wife on day of marry. Yet still Sam do duty.

    Sam gain many great treasure. But Sam fight much for god of law, and lose all of what gain. Even lose piece of heart. Lose self. Is older. Is more tired. Cannot fight as good as used to. But still Sam do duty.

    When Adam die, I think of enter battle for last time. See Adam again. When on wagon, was easy let go. But Sam never let go. Now know was why Tempus give me vision of Sam. Sam never quit. Tempus not want me quit either.

    Sam not as strong as was. Maybe even could beat in duel. But Sam still be “Hero Sam” to Maya.


  • Maya sits in the bathhouse in Peltarch, her long lanky form spread out over several towels away from the pool. Her hair is uncharacteristically absent of braids and ornaments, and instead hangs in loose wet sheaves along her back and shoulders. A basket half full of fruit, cheese and dried meat sits beside a large double-bladed axe next to her elbow, the remainder of her possessions piled in a heap in the corner. With quiet deliberation she dips a quill into an open ink bottle, and begins to write…

    Entry 24

    I know not where to begin, except maybe on wagon. I try think of how to describe things but will have hard time. Has been long time, so think this be long entry. Good thing new journal is large and of many pages. Old one soaked in Maya blood and not good for much except look at old entry.

    I remember write in wagon. Then remember dreams. Not dreams, but maybe vision of Tempus. I see many things not understand, so will write down and figure out later.

    I stand on empty battlefield. Uthger walk by turn to me and say, “Hi ya sexy”, like always do. Could tell was lost though. Very much lost. Could see in eyes that every bit of fire finally gone, but still walk even though not know where walk to. Axe was cover in blood.

    Then was pit. Gildor was in center, and man make auction for audience of many demon. When look over, Gildor just shrug shoulder and smile. Was funny. Gildor make big shadow on ground and shadow not look like Gildor.

    See hero Sam. Was dress like farmer with old clothes and work in endless field. But instead of horse was Sam. Sam have yoke on and plow field with book the size of wagon. Book have big eye on it. When walk by, I offer help pull book, take turn, but Sam not hear and keep plowing.

    Then was Talgrath. Talgrath in big arena and fight many things that shriek and gibber. Talgrath have ball and chain like prisoner though, and make hard to move. I turn to go help, but he laugh and say can handle, and continue to kill gibbering things.

    All this while I walk through strange land, Zyphlin follow. Know he follow, but every time turn around he not there. Finally get annoyed and manage grab, and he laugh and hug like always do. He say have more secrets, and ask if I want know two or three. Then melt from hands into shadows.

    Then see Adam

    There was big bridge of stone with many torch. Adam was on other side, He wave and smile. I see grandfather Bjearn too. He have arm around Adam and shout something about teach play cards. With big smile go see Adam and Bjearn, but when try cross bridge, far half crumble and fall into chasm.

    Tempus appear and is angry. Very, very angry with me. I feel small, like child under father gaze, way he look at me. He just point back way I come and I turn and go, crying because is so sorry make Tempus so angry…and not know why.

    Then all fade away. I wake up in room with candles and three knights with Griffon tabbard who look at me strange.

    I spend much time in room, because feel like bear sit on chest. I pray much to Tempus, and ask forgive for what I do to make angry. I pray for three day before bird messenger come from Tempus again, and make me see what Tempus have to say.

    I see myself and many friends on endless field of grass fighting great battle. See off to side Uthger standing in grass. When look at, he wink at me and walk away. Tempus is far behind, watching from great height with arms folded. Has big smile smile on face, and then clenches fist. When do, fury takes me very much, and enemy cut down like wheat. Tempus laughs, and is pleased.

    Visit in Damara go much better after that.

    Everyone say bandit I kill was great bandit leader, and many people happy to know I defeat. Was many gift of flowers, letters of say Hi, and people want to meet. Was very much great fight, but not worthy of so much pay attention to me. Even had five offer of be marry. Was very silly.

    Three knight show me around great city of Heliogabalus. Was name Elias, Kegan and Jerred. Became good friend while there. Will maybe write letter to.

    See King for little while, but had emissary from Thay and Tethyr, and not have long talk to me

    On day ready to go home, three knight friends give gift. Elias give new journal and Jered write poem. Kegan give greatest gift though. He fix axe.

    It was amazing what Kegan do. He take axe handle, cut down, and make balance. Was great crafter, maybe even better than Adam. I hug for long time, and pick up swing around. Was sad to see go, but know come back again too.

    Now am back in Peltarch. First thing do after come back was check calendar, and see can open chest from King. When open, was expecting axe or sword, maybe even piece of armor. Instead, find large jug of oil with note from court alchemist. Was too hard read for me, so Johan help.

    Part of instruction say put axe in wood trough, put oil in and wait overnight, so I do. Johan very excited about this, and say bottle is very, very old, and is great treasure. We do all instructions, and wait.

    In morning, oil is gone, and axe blade and handle same color as oil. Johan and me try test with helm and melon. Axe cut helm with big poof of flame. When look at helm, was very sharp cut. When look at axe, Johan whistle. No mark on axe. Not even scratch. We have fun all day try different things. Pull out old chest plate. Try dock chain. Try farm plow. Nothing will scratch axe. Johan give back axe and say is axe of king. I tell Johan is wrong. Tell Johan is axe of Maya.


  • Kythorn 5th

    As I make this entry, I am reminded of something I wonderful I saw yesterday.

    I watched from a vantage point in the gardens as Maya and about a dozen of the castle children were playing in the hedge maze. She had tucked a ribbon into the trousers if each child, and several ribbons in hers. She was the “Evil Maze Minotaur”, and all of the children were “Valiant Knights” come to defeat her. To defeat her, they had to pull all the ribbons from her trousers. However, if she pulled a ribbon from a child, they were “slain” and had to go to the center of the maze, leaving their ribbon behind. One of the children however, was the “Valiant Priest”. He was not allowed to try to pull ribbons from Maya, but instead was allowed tuck a ribbon back onto a child and “Bring back from the dead”. There was even “treasure” in the form of pastries and sugared apples, which Maya guarded fiercely.

    I watched as she played with them for a better part of the afternoon. Hiding, roaring, and pouncing on shrieking and laughing children, she made a spectacle of herself. It was as entertaining as any play at the theatre, and it gave me pause for thought about what was truly important in life.

    As simple as she is, I wonder if she may be wiser than the rest of us.

    That said, I was truly sorry to see her depart this morning, taking the caravan east along the Long Road back to her city. She left with several small gifts. Kegan, the artisan that he is, had repaired her axe. It was impossible apparently to replace the wood without destroying the magic, so he had shortened the haft and rebalanced it for one handed use. The delight in her eyes when she received it touched a jealous part of me, for I had naught to give her but a replacement journal, bound in leather and sealed with a Gryphon.

    I hold in my hand a lock of yellow hair. With great ceremony she gave the three of us a small piece of one of her braids. It smells of leather, sweat, and flowers.

    I will cherish it.


  • Mirtul 30th

    It seems I have been neglecting my diary. Perhaps my thoughts have been elsewhere.

    Maya was whisked away by Oster and the Acolytes for nearly two days. When she returned on the 25th, she look tired and confused. I didn’t have the heart to bother her, but she invited me in for an hour to chat, and I couldn’t refuse.

    This “Knight” has been the subject of much gossip around the castle. Not that I can blame folks, but I certainly wouldn’t want to be put in that position. Countless young squires have begged, nae pleaded to see her, and I have no doubt that were I less scrupulous I could have made a fortune in bribes. She had been given permission to roam the castle at will, but chose to stay in her room and pray, and occasionally walk around the grounds outside of her room. I asked her why she would do this, but she had this look of shame, and said nothing

    Several days later she emerged from her room, a bright smile on her face, and asked me to escort her around the city. I was glad for the sudden transformation in her demeanor, but although I was more than happy to oblige, I knew that making it outside the castle grounds unnoticed was futile. I resigned myself to the attention, and together we headed to the gates.

    What should have been a mere 10 minute walk took us the better part of 4 hours.

    It seemed that every soldier, every squire and every castle servant had heard of Maya. She had been built into something larger than life before anyone had even met her. Worse perhaps, her stature and charisma only added to the effect. She stood literally head and shoulders above the crowd, a warm smile gracing her face. To her credit however, she seemed nonplussed by all the attention, and spoke openly and forthright with all who asked her questions, even if they were personal.

    Our time together walking around the city was unexciting and inconsequential in comparison. It was nonetheless enjoyable, and I look forward to it again.

    –

    Kythorn 2nd

    “No, Maya is no married”. How I regret those words she answered to some full-of-himself squire in the crowd a few days ago. I’m a sergeant in his majesty’s service, a knight in the temple of Torm. I am not a chaperone.


  • Mirtul 23rd

    Today I had the opportunity to meet this “Knight”. Even after several hours of discussion I’m not sure what to think of her. She seems to barely grasp the simple trade tongue, and looks upon many things with child-like wonder as if seeing them for the first time. I’m not sure if this is the result of her brush with death, or simply the way she conducts herself. Regardless, she defies any preconception of what I was taught a knight to be.

    She is disarmingly tall. I’m an average sized fellow, fit and trim, and the top of my head came up to her chin. Her hair was loose upon her back, but interspersed with several thick braids tied with leather cords, a few trinkets and black feathers. She speaks with a thick accent I cannot place, and her eyes are almond shaped, leading me to think Kara Tur or parts far west, but they are blue, so I ruled those origins out immediately.

    My meeting began moments after one of the acolytes brought in her evening meal. She opened the door and invited me to share it with her, saying there was no way she could eat it all. She seemed particularly interested in the gryphon design on my chest. When I mentioned it was my crest of the order of Torm she simply said something to the effect, “Torm is of duty and honor, no?”, and smiled.

    We spoke much of the fight with Ralish, and she seemed quite animated in it’s telling. It was difficult to follow her speech at times, but with a little patience on both of our parts we managed. She showed me her armor in the corner, and the rents and gashes made me wonder how she even survived. She seemed particularly upset with her axe however. It was a long handled double-bladed axe, and the handle had been splintered and broken. She said she won it in a duel with someone named “Grax” before she continued her story.

    She also spoke of her Knightly Order, something called "Black Dragons”. Apparently they serve as guards to the senators of Peltarch. I don’t think much of Republics. They are prone to corruption, but her duties in many ways are similar to mine.

    I find myself looking forward to speaking with her tomorrow. Despite her poor speech and obvious lack of education, she’s rather charming. I will pray to Torm for her speedy recovery.


  • Mirtul 22nd

    As I write this, I am not sure how to convey this past evening’s events, but I shall endeavor to do my best.

    I arrived at my post last evening, only to discover that earlier in the day, his majesty himself entered the room, stayed for an hour, then left without a word. Kegan, the knight who has the shift prior informed me that Oster had also come and just shook his head upon leaving. Word was that the knight was not to survive the evening. I offered a solemn prayer to Torm, and prayed again for this man’s soul.

    About three hours into my shift, a terrible storm arrived quickly, the likes I have not seen since childhood. The interior of the hallway was lit as if day, and I was nearly convinced the castle was under siege by the forces of nature. It was then I heard loud weeping from inside the room, and a woman cry out in some odd tongue. Fearing an intruder, I quickly unlocked the door, unsheathed my sword, shouted down the hall for assistance, and burst in.

    The room had obviously been lit with several candles, but most had blown out. The floor of the room near the window was littered with dead ravens. A woman sat up in the bed weeping loudly, muttering the same unintelligible phrase over and over again.

    I laugh at myself to think that my first thought was the disbelief that Ralish Moonblade was killed in combat by a woman.

    I stood there for an indeterminate length of time, as the lightning outside disappeared almost as fast as it arrived. Kegan and Jerred arrived quickly enough, and stood beside me in disbelief as well. Finally, the woman looked up at us from the bed, and switched to the trade tongue.

    “I’m sorry”, she wept. “I’m sorry”

    We all just looked at each other, not knowing what to say. Finally, I stepped forward and introduced myself, along with my fellow knights, and asked if we could be off assistance. I wasn’t really sure what to make of this. My preconceptions had been shattered. I had convinced myself that this “knight” would be older, distinguished, and…male. She looked around tearfully for a moment, a look of bewilderment on her face. She looked down almost shamefully, then looked up at us and pointed to her chest.

    “Maya”, she said. “Name is Maya”

    It was then that Oster rushed in and shooed the three of us out, leaving me with many questions but no answers.


  • Mirtul 21st

    I have taken three evening shifts at the knight’s chambers. By order of the King, the only people allowed are three acolytes and Oster, a priest of Torm. There have been several knights in my unit and a few at the temple who ask of news, but I have little and to be truthful feel that gossip is beneath one of my station. Still, I cannot help but watch Oster’s concerned face, which grows graver by the day.

    After my shift, I pray to Torm again and ask that he bless this Knight, and keep his soul safe.


  • The following are excerpts from the diary of Elias Tur, 1st Sergeant of the King’s Guard, and Defender in Holy Order of the Gryphon, Temple of Torm, Damara.

    Mirtul 18th

    It’s funny how one can miss the sun. It’s shining for the first time in almost two months, and regardless of the cold the streets are filled with the antics and shouts of children. Despite the long campaign against the raiders my spirits are up, for I have received news that their leader, Ralish Moonblade was killed a few days east of our great city along the Long Road by caravan guards. Though I hope beyond measure that this news bears truth, I find this difficult to believe. I am grimly aware of his fighting prowess. I lost two good friends to his blades. I am to report to my captain forthwith.

    –

    The news is true! At the assembly of the men, Captain Shaer pulled his head from a burlap sack. His head and swords are to be presented to his majesty. It was also reported that his death was not at the hands of the caravan guards, but a knight from our easterly neighbors in lands of Narfell. It pains me to say I find relief in this, for it did not seem befitting that a man who personally killed two of Torm’s finest would taken down by mere caravan guards. My hopes of meeting this man were diminished, when Captain Shaer reported that he lay dying in the castle chambers. He had been ministered by a priest, yet still lay in the twilight between life and death. I was honored to be chosen one of three to guard the room. I will pray for his speedy recovery.


  • This page is fingerprinted in blood. The writing meanders and is sloppy. Words run together and in many places, the ink is smudged.

    Entry 23

    I awake now. I will try to tell of journey and of fight with bandits

    Travel through Giantspire was good and most of journey was safe. We stop many times and have fun by fire. Is music troupe who travel from Bardic college to capital of Damara, and entertain most every night. We have big dance one night and tell stories. Was best time I have in long time.

    Not run into trouble until near capital, was three day…..

    ….

    ….I must have pass out again, will try continue

    Was three day from city when bandit came. Was many, maybe 30. Maybe more. All on horse. All use bow. Was great battle, but many people die who should not. They not even ask surrender. Just attack.

    They come on horse and ride by caravan, shooting bow. I never see person shoot from horse like this, and was amazing to watch. Even as people around me die, could not help be impress. But I have way to fight back. I have Adam bow.

    Adam keep bow in case. Was not good balance, but take much strength to pull back and hit very hard with arrow. I learn to use after Adam go to Tymora, and practice with much.

    Most guard have crossbow. Crossbow easy to use but take time load. Johan show me how to plant tower shield in ground and use as cover. After shoot six men on horse and knock to ground, I make horseman angry. Two ride by with curve sword. I leave shield in ground and pull great axe. First person ride by get cut in half. Second person duck and retreat, so pick up bow again and shoot. Maya now kill eight.

    Horsemen stop. Man in bright silk come forward on horse. He point to me and about 20 pace away, he get off and draw two curve sword. Not say word, just nod head in salute and fight.

    After first few moment, could tell was not be like fight with ogre. This person better than ogre. This person better than many. This person better than Maya.

    With belt of Tempus sing in my ears, I try swing, but axe feel slow next to his swords. He dance and swing so fast that my axe is heavy and cannot follow. After minute, he has two gash from axe, and I cut from so many places that almost cannot stand. He is very good find places where armor is not.

    I remember thinking was good way to die, like this, facing great swordsman in great battle. I remember thinking Adam be happy to see me, and how proud Tempus would be. I knew could not win. So I let Tempus in me one last time, let fury take hold of me, and try last trick Kalin teach me. Is sometimes important to let be hit to win fight

    I am big person. Can look Talgrath in eye. So I scream Tempus name and rush. I know be hit, but not care. When he swing and dance aside, curved sword bite deep, but when he try move away, I am holding great axe sideways. Handle of axe hit in stomach, and we both land in heap on ground. Was struggle when I draw knife from boot, but overpower quickly.

    I see death in his eyes when kill him with knife

    I remember stand. I remember horsemen leave. I remember many guard come and look at me. Then wake up in wagon.

    I lay here now for not know how long. I cannot feel legs and am cold. Holding quill is hard when so cold.

    Maybe Adam not wait so long after all.

    This is the last entry in this journal


  • Entry 22

    I have long talk with Uthger today. I know is not evil, and know is not become undead because bleed. I not understand things that go on in big fight with Grag, but know that much of it is Tempus will. Maybe Tempus want war with Legion, maybe Tempus want war with Norwick. I do not know which is, but must trust in Tempus.

    Is all I will say, even in journal.

    Get letter from Koreth today. Koreth was very please with gift from King of Damara. Ask me to go to Damara again and be “emissary”. Johan say that mean Maya talk for Koreth.

    I am not scared of battle, but being emissary scare me! I know am not good with words. Maybe should teach King of Damara Uthgardt tongue. Johan smile and say is very proud of me. Is big step and good career move, whatever that mean. He laughs and say one day, maybe Maya will be Senator. I laugh back and say first time senator Ashald insult Maya, Ashald lose many teeth when fist hit face. We both have good laugh with that. I would be senator short time I think.

    So now must pack again and go on caravan. I hope ogre not there. I have no wagon to bargain for duel.


  • Entry 21

    I frustrated. Pirate is clever, and can hear nothing that can make arrest. I keep try and hope.

    I meet Kalina in Gypsy camp. Was not sure how be to her. She have not honor by betray Uthger sleep with Anakore. But she say have proof that Deacon is pirate, and give note that I keep safe. I will find out from Deacon if true. I know must be careful. If hide behind words with Uthger, why not Maya? Maybe is another lover fight with Deacon, and she make up words to have me kill.

    Now, I also very sad because hear something cannot be true. I hear Uthger turn to evil. I did not believe when first hear from Ka’ell, but were many voices. Many see Uthger summon great evil spirits. I hope is wizard trick, but think not. Was many year ago when Evil Revenant Spirit ask Maya to work for, and promise much power. Maya say no. Maybe Uthger say yes.

    I wonder what Tempus think about this. Maybe want to see who strongest, Uthger or Maya. I already lose many time to Uthger in practice. He is bigger and have more experience. If true, Tempus knows will have to fight. Tempus always keep show Maya in vision must fight evil. I think if fight Uthger though, will be last fight.

    Is OK. I not fear die for Tempus with honor. I can then go to hall of heroes, and maybe visit Adam. I not seek death. I will wait for death find me. Then Maya will stand tall and proud.

    Is Tempus will.


  • Entry 20

    Tonight I am angry. Was going to write “mad” but Johan say is proper write angry. Only animal get mad he say. I think about this for awhile, and think mad is right too.

    I was south of Norwick and meet Mirk, Tando Gears and two women I not remember names to. We talk much. Tando has amulet I want. I offer buy but he not want to sell. Was funny watch Mirk tease Tando, then little Tando jump on Mirk head and beat with fists. Was most fun I have in long time, until someone mention pirate.

    Word pirate makes my blood sing in ears ready for battle.

    It seem that some people think man named Deacon is pirate. I will find out from Deacon and if true, will be dead pirate. I know this person. See on Sam Hill a couple times, and in town couple times too. I know face and will find. I ask group where can find Deacon, and they say is often drunk by docks in Peltarch. So I go.

    When get into town, ask group in commons where Deacon is. Talgrath ask why, and when I say going to kill, Talgrath give long talk to.

    Talgrath say cannot kill without proof. Of course not! I was going to ask him if he was pirate, and when say yes was going to challenge to duel and then kill. Then Talgrath say words that I still not believe hear.

    Talgrath say Peltarch docks full of pirate and slavers, but is no proof. No proof, no arrest. No proof, no kill.

    I get so angry, that Tempus belt sing in my ears. Can almost hear Tempus tell me go to docks, kill every pirate in big glorious battle. But Talgrath make listen. Tell me that would not be worthy of knight, because would be murder to kill everyone without know who is and who is not. Would maybe kill innocent people.

    Talgrath is older so I listen. He is right. I will need proof. But then he say words that make me think much. He say, “The sooner accept that world is not so easy to tame to your will, the better off you be”.

    I think of these words much. I think of these words in long hot bath. I think of these words before go to sleep. Then get up in middle of the night when words bother me.

    Words maybe true, but think people who take words to heart are reason why pirate still in Peltarch. I have simple plan to find proof. When find proof, I hope pirate and slaver resist arrest so can stain docks with their blood. Tempus would like that. So would I.

    Let other people accept not change things. Not Maya.


  • Entry 19

    I meet Uthger and Gildor yesterday by lake south of Norwick. Was long and nice talk about life, family, and love.

    Gildor try talk Uthger and me into be mates. Was nice for Gildor try to find new mate for me, but know in my heart would not work. Fire is gone from Uthger heart, and I need man with fire. Uthger say has been around and through too much shit. Adam be around for much longer, through more I think, and still had fire. Is all depend on kind of person is.

    Uthger will always be friend. I always find great honor to fight beside Uthger in battle. Just not be mate.

    What I not understand is why Gildor not be mates with Uthger. Both love each other. I can see in Uthger face, and in Gildor’s eyes. Gildor says would be complicated. I think Gildor hide behind words so often that cannot see own heart.

    It makes me sad for her.


  • Entry 18

    Was very slow day today. Was person sleeping under bench in commons. Guard did not notice, so I try to find out of vagrant, as is law against. He give me lot of argue, but have more than 10 gold. I tell was silly place to sleep.

    I continue to mark days on calendar can open chest for gift from King of Damara. I wonder often why make wait, but think perhaps way to test honor. Maybe if open too soon, things inside disappear.

    Met person name was Hoy-Chin. He report was Kobold right outside west gate, so I went investigate with him. By time arrive there, guard take care of and was no longer problem. He seem to hate kobold much though, so traveled in west hills with and killed many. He even show me cave I not know exist, and we go inside and kill many there too. Maya think is obsessed (is good word Johan give me. It means crazy about one thing)


  • Entry 17

    I had strange dream last night. Was in dark hallway with Gildor. Man give me swords to blood, and goblins keep coming out of woodwork.

    I woke up and went to commons to watch over, and was funny thing meet Gildor there too. Gildor was with son named Alex.

    It warm my heart to see young boy, and I play with for time. It makes me think what I would be like to be mother, and wished again that I could have given Adam a son. I give him three things. I give him ring of light so that he will not be afraid of shadows. I give him coin, so he will not be without, and give him feather Tempus give me so that Tempus will watch and he grow up to be strong warrior.

    If cannot have own child, can make other children happy.


  • Entry 14

    I lose journal for long time. Look everywhere, but not see. Then see Brin read (is in platoon), which makes me angry. Journal is for me only, and maybe other friend if I give to. So I walk up to Brin and hit in face with every pound of strength I have. Blood go everywhere, and Brin lose a few teeth. I grab journal and leave, but after he get up, I hear sword clear sheath. So I pick up axe next to bunk.

    I could see look in Brin’s eyes. Brin would be good match for me in fight with armor and shield. But here in barracks and both with no armor, he sees that I am not afraid to die. Fight not happen except with platoon leader Johan. He call both into office later. Johan is only person I know who can yell at someone and not raise voice.

    Entry 15

    Is 15 entries already! I wonder what will look like when get to 100. I will probably need another journal.

    I went into kobold caves with Gildor and Zyphin and Roland. Gildor run around like tribal warrior, jump kobold from behind and cut before can count to 3. I have not seen Gildor like this, and was good side of her. Then Zyplin take aside and tell her to calm down. I do not understand why Zyphlin want to spoil Gildor fun. If Zyphlin try to tell Maya to calm down, I would tell Zyphlin to stuff it.

    Entry 16

    Wizard Sky is back! I am so happy to see! I tell her wait in commons because was on duty help citizen, but she not wait and head south to find Zyphlin. After help citizen, I go south to catch up.

    I meet up with Zyphlin first, and we go look for Wizard Sky. It turn out that she use no-see magic, and was probably there whole time. Is almost as bad as read journal without permission I think, but think perhaps Wizard Sky just do to be safe and not nosey. Was great fun watching Zyphlin get hug by someone who cannot see.

    All of us go to hunt great warg, but was warg who hunt us. They setup great ambush for us, and Zyphlin almost die. Zyphlin and Wizard Sky have to retreat, so I finish kill. Was great and worthy fight, and my blood start to sing.

    When regain senses, Wizard Sky and Zyphlin help kill more warg, wolf that breath snow, and even more warg. We sit in Ormpur and talk for awhile, then go back. Warg smell blood, so come to see what go on with litter mates, and have to fight even more. When we reach Jiyyd again, my blood is singing in ears hard, and Tempus belt is making me feel like could lift wagon over head.

    Fight is over. Trees look greener. Air smells better. Is time to celebrate life.

    Adam would understand when I was like this, and just smile and lead to house or nearest inn. Often not even make upstairs. Now is no one. I look to Zyphlin and many thoughts go through head, but Zyphlin have Wizard Sky. So I run to Norwick and hope Uthger is by fire. He is only person I think besides Adam who understand. But is not there. By time I go back to Pelarch in commons, feeling is mostly gone.

    Then find out, Uthger have mate anyway. Kalina be Uthger mate. Have long talk with, laugh with, until Kalina say not want be mother. I cannot understand how would not want to give Uthger child and waste gift of life. I would give much to have given Adam a child

    I spend long time in bath house that night, just sit in hot water and think. Was the first time I cry since Adam’s death.


  • Entry 12

    I write this in morning, so try to remember. I had fun tease Zyphlin.

    Zyphlin is good friend of mine. Probably one of best friend outside of Knights. Zyphlin is fun and have heart of fire. Everything adventure with him.

    I meet in commons. First thing he do is come over and hug. We say hellos, and then he say getting ready for turn in. I try to think up something to do, because have not seen in long time. Then he decide want to go east plains to kill cat and get food.

    First, I not like cat. Is stringy and test terrible. But we go, and have fun in combat, though cat not challenge for me. Then while adjust armor, Zyphlin do silly thing and wander off. I spend a long time looking for, but lion find first. Good thing Zyphlin have magic.

    Finally, cook lots of meat, and he hugs again. Zyphlin always hugging me today, and wonder what go on in head of his. I write in journal entry many days ago that think Zyphlin look cute, and would like to lure to grassy field and pin to ground. Make pleasures with.

    Here I am, in grassy field with Zyphlin hugging me.

    I laugh to self for many moment, then tell Zyphlin is not wise hug me when all excited after combat. I lean arm on shoulder, get face real close, and tell him I am much bigger, think is very cute, and wonder if he want me pin to ground.

    Was first time think see Zyphlin not talk for few minutes. Eyes get big as dinner plate, then Zyphlin have many words that ramble together

    I have to laugh. I would not really do. Zyphlin is try be mate of Wizard Sky, who is friend of mine. But I did think about. Would be fun to pin to grass.

    I think I will ask Wizard Sky if OK, just for fun.

    Entry 13

    Oh, I forget. Zyphlin try teach me make magic light. It was very silly.


  • Entry 11

    Had very strange letter. Was from Erik Olafson. He upset that Anakore not write, and ask Maya to speak to.

    I been write Erik long time now. Demi start with help when letter come from mother to Erik, and letter find me. Was long time ago, when I try become Black Dragon Knight for Troth. Is long story, but I find out that father Jahr not real father, but was man named Jahn. Grandfather knew this from birth, but not tell father Jahr. However, tell Jahn that great dishonor, and forbid trade with tribe. This make brother Erik very angry, and not speak to Jahn again. It also explain my yellow hair.

    Erik was Robyn uncle, and is my uncle by blood. Is my family, though not.

    I explain this to Robyn on hill many years ago, when younger. Robyn not listen to my words of dishonor father. I try explain is truth, but see woman not trust me, and not like me. I think in heart she know truth, but not want to think of father this way. Now I lose blood relation who not even know, and this saddens me.

    Erik is even sadder though, that Anakore not write. Erik want to know Robyn while Robyn alive before die.

    I wrote two letter once to blood cousin call Selandra, was Erik daughter. Was tall like Maya, and was warrior of Tyr. I never meet, but think would have been of same spirit. I hear she die too facing great evil.

    I think perhaps, that die in combat become family tradition.

    Anakore also say some things about Koreth that Maya not like to hear, that act with dishonor. Maya only see Koreth as great leader, but will speak to Johan about. Anakore admit that Anakore is man without honor, so I take words with smaller value. Perhaps is better then that sister of blood Robyn die than become mate of man who have no honor.