Journals of a Youths Void -- Abigail Anne Uramesy



  • A collection of a small journal Abiie started keeping as of late. To bookmark her troubles and victorys in this time of her life

    It's been a long time since i've gotten a new jounral. I am very glad I have found one for cheap, well one my style anyhow. I left my old one with all of my notes in my old room at the inn, with my father.

    For the past week I have been living with Senator Syne. He is a very interesting elf, and I am not annoyed with him like I am most of his kind. He has a certain wit about him that I cannot pinpoint. Though he is usually busy he obviously doesnt want any harm to come to me, with his "Want something to drink?" "want something to eat?". I am really lucky.

    Though, for a while I thought he was dead. I wad heading off with him to some city called Arnut I think. I asked if I should put on my new costume to stay hidden… he declined so I figured it was okay.

    Mr. Zyphlin was the first to see me. Him and Atel plus a few others. He grabbed my arm tightly and I seriously thought I was fucked. But no. Syne demanded he let me go which he eventually did...

    My father... he came up next. I didn't know what to say to him, im afraid I will be beat for running off again, for hiding and not speaking to him, not telling him where i went too. He is a very caring man... I know he would never hit me but, I want my gift -oh so-.

    He wishes for it to be removed from my being. And thanks to many others I feel Mister Evendur, Mister Anakore, Miss Eowiel, Mr. Zyphlin and my father know... oh Syne knows as well. But he is trustworthy. He is like me.

    Well, Syne turned me invisible and I sprinted back to his home. Though once I relized thats probably where everyone would go I ran out into the nars, I was still invisible and I climbed a small hill, leaning against a tower....

    then it happened... My father and Syne started to fight, I think Syne almost... almost killed him. Mister Zyphlin entered and I hid around a corner, Mister Mirkali... a smart ass bard noticed me.

    I tried to get away several times but he informed me he had some haste spell and silence spells. I was in shit for if my father returned...

    He turned me invisible and silenced us. Tieing our wrists together with a rope and I led him back to the senator appartments. I tried to make him go away but he INSISTED on following me.

    I went up to Synes room and it was locked... I never got a key. I dropped my bedroll and layed down upon it, waiting for him to return with that fucking bard next to me the entire time. He went on and on and on like most bards tend to do.

    I got a bad headache, in part from my head weaving itself closer to Lady Shar and half from that damn bards constant chatter. Eventually he left me alone... dropping off some tea, dried beef and 30 coins if I wanted a room at the inn...

    Earlier today Syne woke me up. I am told he returned not too long after I fell asleep. He let me in and gave me a key to his place, threatening me slightly...

    he is an odd elf, indeed. Caring for me and threatning. He reminds me of a powerful mage I met once
    Abiie Uramesyy-



  • Dear Diary,

    I woke up today feeling much better. Syne was away for the day for some meeting that would take up most of his morning so I figured I should celebrate my recovery of healthy by going outside to read.

    When I got outside there were a group of people, Miss Eowiel. I started to read and some little girl kept going on and on about adventure, her and Mister Samson were going out west to visit the kobolds, I tagged along. Samson put a hand upon my shoulder and stared at me a while, I was about ready to set a burning hands spell down his pants… but he must of been day dreaming, he just shook his head and kept walking.

    When we got out the gates the girl chickened out and ran back inside. I really wanted to see what was beyond the stream so I continues with Mister Samson to some small cave out deeper in the hills.

    When in the cave I saw a few farking HUGE kobolds. They were damn near the size of two of the baby runts. Mister Samson took them out without any effort, though they got a hit or two on them. And a single hit on me, left a nice scrape on my hand. (which i want to burn off, I cant believe one TOUCHED me).

    Then I saw it, what my father was always talking about. The infamous cave hag. No more then a second after I saw her I fell down and fainted. Her breath was so horrible, it felt like my muscles were being sucked straight from my body.

    When I woke up, Samson was shaking me a bit, I stood up and we decided to exit the cave.

    This is the part that I don't understand. Samson said he looked into my heart and saw it was corrupt? Bullshit. How can a heart be corrupt?? I blame my mother, she is the one who ripped in half, maybe thats how you currupt a heart. You break it. If that is so than my heart is one of the most corrupt around.

    Samson wants me to go back to the Tyr temple for classes, i'm not doing that anymore, beyond the laughing and the pointing they give me for what I wear and my ability to cast magics... they are all morons. I'm done with that part of my life.

    I can't even write right now. It's too stupid what people believe. Is Syne the only person alive who trusts me? Perhaps I might even be wrong with that... Eowiel told me...

    People are after me. They want to destroy me because they think I am something of a threat... I don't know. Eowiel said I should go live with Calendall... but I wanted to live with Syne. Life was so fun there, so... comfortable. But she says Syne will kick me out if his political position comes under question to do him holding me. Which I guess I am a criminal? But I never broke a law... this is bullshite. I'm going to bed, i'll start packing in the morn.

    -Abiie



  • Dear Diary,

    I'm sick today. Just a small stomach cramp I think, but I have been in bed reading all day. The sun is settting now, I figure its the end of the day. I should right something in here.

    When I woke up I felt fine, I walked over to the table with the breakfast food upon it, sat down and started eating some bread, I really didn't feel that hungry. But you need food in the morning to get you through the day.

    After I ate a single muffin, I felt dizzy. I headed to the couch near the table and sat down, rubbing my head. I felt like shite. I feel like shite. -anyhow, I think I layed there for a good hour, Syne came home and asked me what was wrong.

    Elves for some odd reason know when something is wrong or not. Sort of like how a dog can sense danger. I told him I didn't feel well and he told me to lay down. He put his papers on the table and left.

    He returned a few hours later with a large basket, inside he brought out a very large black quilt, he wrapped me up within it and placed my head down upon a new pillow. He bought a bunch of herbs and junk like that, he started pouring them together and mixed it with some wine and juice.

    He told me to drink it, he tilted my head back and brought the gobblet to my lips, I drank the entire thing. It was good and it made my throat feel better. I think him toying with my hair was comforting in a way as well.

    After I drank that mixture of herbs I felt dizzy. He rested my head back down upon the pillow and I fell asleep.

    He just woke me up about an hour ago to give me a bowl of warm chicken soup. He told me to go to bed after I drank it, that I would feel better in the morning. He is such a wonderful person, no wonder he is a senator.



  • These past few days i've been to busy to write. I have just been falling asleep, then waking up and going back out. Syne had some sort of meeting he had to attend so he informed me he wouldn't be in for the week. He left me enough coins to buy meals and visit the bathouse a few times. But let's see where to start…

    A group of men, Mister Olsen, Gabriel, and Paci took me out to the kobolt foothills... well, if you want to get strict with words, I found them out there. Sort of caught them off guard too. They were all pretty nice, except Gabriel, who just looked like a dick, acted like one too. We stayed out there a good few days, we actually camped out. It was weird not sleeping in a bed but I supose that would be good for me.

    When I returned I headed to the bathhouse, I met this noble woman who was telling me about she and her cat have been living alone for a good number of years. She invited me over but I quickly declined, no freaky cat woman is going to have me over.

    After I dried off and headed back out, I ran into some other kid... Vath his name was. He looked about my age if not a little older. He was doing that "i'm going to act tough to impress that girl" act. Nate came up and I told Vath he was my boyfriend, just to see what would happen. They got into a small fight of words and Nate left, I told Vath I didn't have a boyfriend and then he resumed trying to be tough. I finally got some talk out of him, not kid talk but real talk. It was out by my spot near the lake. Quite the place it is, tends to bring out the best in people.

    I gave Vath the key to the room my father rented me, i'm never in it so I figure it'll look like someone is using it. I told him about my father, told him if he sees my pops in the inn to NOT enter my inn room. Last thing I need is my father seeing some teenager walking into my room late at night, even if i'm not there that would be hard to explain.

    Ah, Anah brought my soup.

    -Love Abiie



  • Dear Diary,

    Things are getting interesting, t'day Mirkali came up to me. He felt bad about what he did so asked what he could do to make it up to me. I told him if he gets me a fine velvet dress I will forgive him. For some reason I spent the rest of my day with him, I dind't really want to but he offered me a drink, we headed to the mule and… he told me about his past, a lot of hurting people. I couldn't stand it, I had to puke when he told me some of the details, I ran off to Synes room and grabbed a book, I couldn't eat dinner that day - and he brought home garlic beef. I told him I wasn't hungry and just wished to sleep, he let me alone. I went to bed, quite the day.



  • Dear Diary,

    Woke up, had breakfast, went for a walk. got tired. sat in the commons, and this is where my day starts…

    Nate came up to me and he starts talking about silly things, much the same as he usually does. It's not like I know him though, he is not much older than me, he hasnt mocked me yet like most of the kids my age. I bairly know him though, i've seen him a good three times maybe? Who knows.

    This man come up to me, dressed in fine purple and black robes, he gave me a pass to the backrooms at the Ferret and told me I had much to learn from him. At first I was worried and was just going to throw the pass out, but curiosity got the best over me and I ended up going with him.

    We went up to the second floor of the Ferret, and I relized why I liked that bar so much. Up there is a alter to Shar in this mans room. He never told me his name but I think he was a Sharian cleric, he told me to look for the darkness inside people I usually am near, I guess that would mean Syne. He gave me a VIP pass to the backrooms so I no longer have to pay everytime I want to visit. He said I could use his room all I wanted, very nice of him.

    After I exited Nate followed me. He couldnt get upstairs though. He was curious about what was beyond the locked door as well. I told him nothing special, he shrugged it off, and we walked away.

    Later in the commons I saw Merydian, she bought me a beautiful cloak, dark red and black with gold trim. It must of cost her a bundle. It has a lot of pockets which are used for wizards to organize things. It was real sweet of her.

    We went to dinner at the Pissing Goat, just some soup which was like liquid shite. Only a silver coin each too. I started a fight between some sailors and other guys, I don't think she liked that. We headed to the Ferret and we had drinks, he bought me a velvet... very odd. I dont think she knows how that makes me, but she doesnt have too. I traded it for a wine in my pack.

    She had to go, she left. I had to go, it was early in the morning and wished to sleep. I went back to Syne's home and passed out.

    -Abiie



  • Dear Diary,

    Today started off pretty much how they usually do. Waking up, digging my way out of several fur blankets, as soft and warm as if I was laying on the actual animals. I headed over to the small table in the other room and began to eat a few pieces of bread, usually there when I wake up. I headed to the window and looked out, appeared to be another cool, boring day.

    I walked over to the bookshelf and again picked out a new book, I figure if I finish one a day I can get through most of them by the time i'm 17. Today's book was another thick tomb, it talked about some devil archgod but didn't mention a name. Just mentioned how one would go about praying, why one should pray and a bit of dogma, wasnt the best read I have ever had but it was still a way to blow through time.

    I started to read, the next thing I know the sun is setting and I havnt even eaten dinner. I only had a few pages left though, so I made a plan to finish the book and get dinner.

    Syne suprised me. He offered to take me out, to see some play at the theatre and get something to eat at the Mermaid, I was feeling hungry and social, so with a smile I agreed to it. Sounded fun.

    I went to my room and looked through a drawer I have been filling with clothes every now and then, I really didn't have anything to wear. Nothing… fitting of a play. I had a bunch of robes, because robes are warm and comfortable. They keep you fine on a chilly day, but I relized I have no dresses.

    I put on my emerald earings and my silver pin, I put on the soft soft soft gloves Miss Lilly gave me and tried to alter a set of robes to look more... feminin. Figure I should find a nice velvet dress maybe, I don't know - those are awfully expensive.

    The show at the theatre was okay, I don't really like plays as much as I used too, something about bards just getting on my nerves. The dinner was great though, it was some fine elvin dish that I can't even pronounce let alone spell. It had a very nice walnut sauce and there were some vegitables with honey glaze, it was fantastic, I could bairly stand up at the end, plus the bottle of wine didn't help.

    We came back to the room and I passed out on the couch, nay even bothered to go to my room and get in bed. I was tired.

    Oh well, it's morning now and I am off to go get some paperwork to work on from the civic office. That was one of the best nights I have had in a long time, may take a walk later too.

    --Love Abigail.



  • Dear Diary,

    Miss Lilly. Miss Lilly. Miss Lilly. Miss Lilly, she. Miss Lilly. She gave me a pair of gloves. They are soft. They are white, I am going to have to dye them, they do not match with my velvet robes. But they are soft. Miss Lilly. They are very soft to the touch, and they smell nice. I removed them from my hand and sniffed my fingers, they smelled like roses. The moment I removed them Syne asked "Did you bring wild flowers home?" I held up my hand and told him about Miss Lilly. I showed him the gloves, I brushed my hand against his cheek to show him what they did to my skin, its so soft. It's odd feeling like this, it felt natural to touch his cheek. Why do people call him a monster? He does nothing but spoil me.

    It's silly that my life has been so uneventful that I need to write about gloves, the entire entry, i'm going to dye them, be right back.

    They are sitting out by the window pane, they are dark black now, I hope I didn't ruin them, but I don't think that the dye would do that to them. It was fairly expensive, I found it in a drawer. I figure I should buy a nice dress for if Syne ever decides to take me to one of those senator partys they have. A beautiful black dress with a purple trim. That would be nice, It would probably make me look older too.

    My jewery collection has been growing since I have the coin to buy more things now. No longeris my hair held back with that damn copper pin, I bought a silver one today, no one seems to notice. But I do.



  • Dear Diary,

    I havnt left Syne's room all day. I've been sitting, eating, drinking, reading, anddoing a lot of thinking. Thinking about small things. Whenever something doesnt go my way I just feel like I can't take it. That everything is against me, everyone doesnt like me. Any sort of emotion I show can be seen as a weakness for everyone else to play off of. If I smile they know i'm happy, if I cry they know i'm sad. I'm sick of this. I needed a break.

    I packed myself some lunch, bread with little chunks of ham in it and swiss cheese loaf. I headed out to the lake and just sat, looking at the ships come and go. I noticed to the left of me was a beautiful flower patch. Someone must of spent lots of time growing and cariing for these flowers.

    I'm not sure if it was out of jelousy or out of boredem but I burned that flower bed. I burned it to the ground and destroyed it. It felt good. It gave me a moment of relief. I don't care at the moment what Mirkali thinks. Syne thinks like me. That is what is important right now.

    The most imporant thing is that I know whats right. I can make things right.



  • I hate being locked away. I hate feeling like things are holding me in. Yet, for some reason I can't leave Syne's room. I fear being outside yet hate being cramped up. I left once today, I left to get fresh air. I don't even remember the last time I took a long warm bath. I smell bad.

    Merydian caught me as I was sitting down, maybe she does care about me. She checked me over, looking at my body as if I would harm myself. She wanted to talk, she hugged me. She was warm, I felt tears coming out. I can't cry. Strong women don't cry. I had to, I used magic. I shrouded the area in darkness and took off, I ran in the direction of Synes room.

    I was frazzled, I got lost, I ended up in a big circle and they found me. Merydian and Kalina. Kalina talked Merydian out of talking to me for a good while, so I took that opportunity to walk away, they can't know I live with Syne, so I headed to the Mermaid. I called Merydian "Miss Merydian" I should of called her mommy, I want to call her mommy.

    I went to the room my father got me in the mermaid. It was cold, unused… lonley. I waited in there an hour before pulling my hood up and running back here to Syne's.

    All this grief and stressed caused by that whore who gave birth to me.



  • Dear Diary…

    Why are some people so... intollerant? Let's take Mirkali for example. He continues to lock me away and keep me places when I want to leave. He is greedy that way yet he does it all because thats what he feels is best.

    Syne never keeps me locked away.

    My father... my step-father I should say, he tells me who is good and who is bad. How can you judge someone if they are good or bad? There is no such thing as evil and good. Actions don't speak louder than words they only show what you do when in the heat of the moment.

    Syne never judges anyone.

    My mother leaves me, she claims to still miss me but she left me in a temple of Selunites, she was once a wonderful person. She used to care. She doesn't anymore, she just regrets I found my way home. She left me when she felt it was a good time.

    Syne never left me.

    Merydian is kind. Merydian is smart. Merydian is fun to be around, but at the same time I don't know what to think of her, she is so sweet yet I don't know if she really cares or if it's all just a show. She is confusing.

    Syne is easy to understand.

    Eowiel is smart, funny but she is a performer, I know she cares about me but her emotions feel greedy. She is sick so I don't really know what to say about her. She hates my mother just as everyone else does. Just as I do.

    Syne is smart, funny, and a senator.

    The list can continue on forever. Mirkali wants me to hate him forever if I kill my mother. He says I will either turn into a large pool of sadness or I will become a ruthless killing war-machine. No one understands what I want. No one gets it.

    Syne understands what I want.

    I'm writting this from my bed at Syne's quarters. I do not wish to leave here. Some things have happened which just make me feel horrible. I just plan to read till the end of the month, hopfully things will clear up.

    I miss feeling truely loved and accepted.



  • Dear Diary,

    My energy just feels more developed. I feel ready to take on my mother finally. I think I may want to do it soon, i'm not sure.

    I guess it all depends what is going to happen when I see her, its been… five years since i've last seen her. Since i've lasted cared to see that Selunite whore.

    Syne brought home some warm bread the other day, small pieces of sourdough that go well with wine. They were good.

    I guess maybe I should stay on todays topics, instead of just ranodm thoughts. I just seem to be having random thoughts. I sent a note to Sir Calendall abouit obtaining a shard to hold my mothers soul, so if she ever comes back it will be because I let her.

    I talked to Miss Lina about Syne. I tried to figure out those secrets he wont tell me. She told me he would tell me when he sees me fit. I guess if I want to know the truth I have to stay with him, which frankly, I don't mind doing.



  • Dear Diary

    She still continues to stare at me. Recently a bunch of people are giving me bad looks. People are looking me up and down before scoffing and looking away. In the commons I actually noticed a small group sitting across from me, some guy pointed at me and his buddy glared.

    Why does everyone have a silver sythe up their ass? Is there no place a beautiful young woman can go to avoid such stares. Maybe i'm stuck up with myself, or maybe I should just ask them to stop staring.

    One day i'm going to snap and just burn their faces off. My magic is so powerful, and I never get to use it much. It's such a warm feeling in my palm, such a warm feeling…

    Recently I have been doing work that my father gave me. He got me a job with some senators documents, mailing and delivering them out. Most of the time it's pretty easy because if I don't know where to deliver one Syne knows. And most of the time i'm right next to Syne, i've been doing most of my work in his quarters so far, my father just thinks i'm in the room he rented out for me.

    Merin a few years ago cast a spell upon me to make me forget about Garret, my real father. - I recall everything now, his spell wore off. Who knows what tomorrow will bring.



  • Twas sitting in the commons, mind-opps.

    Dear Diary,

    Twas sitting in the commons, minding my own buisiness when Mirkali came around. He stared at me a while before telling himself that I could still use magics. That I was hiding it, we went back to his place at the college and I sat upon his dresser, he went through the same old shit everyone says, how it will end up consuming me, turning me. It won't. I have more will power than all those before me, I will become powerful with it, I will become strong.

    I went back to my inn room, took a nap and came back outside. Some girl keeps staring at me, I'm getting real annoyed with men and women who stare. I am not for sale, stop looking. My father and Mery came outside, I convinced them for a brief second that I was pregnant that made my day. They both freaked out! It was a funny moment in the day. I said I wanted to go inside and I headed to my inn room. Instead I headed over to Syne's, I finished reading another one of his books and am moving on to another layer of the hells. It's really hard. But then again, nothing worth doing is every easy the saying goes right?

    My mother dies by the end of this year.

    -Love Abiie.



  • Dear Diary,

    Ron. I am going to remember that name, Ron. Ron is the name of this little prick who is a year younger than me here at the city, his father is some noble with a silver dagger up his ass and his mother is the same. He is the most annoying piece of shite ever. He keeps talking about how pathetic I am just because he thinks I cannot use my magics anymore. But then again, everyone is thinking that.

    I recently decided that in order to make everyone stop putting the candlelight upon me I am going to tell people I have no connection to the weave any longer, all except Syne. Syne knows me. Syne trusts my choices and understands.

    Even Mirkali thinks that I am just some common child now.

    My power feels strong, it feels developed. I have been reading Syne's books from cover to cover, think I only have a couple dozen left to read, i'm learning so much. I have decided what I wish my familiar to be, and once I get to talk to Syne i'm going to see how he feels about it. I'm going to harness a devil. They are powerful, strong, and hard to destroy. Perfect for me.

    I have already tried to open a small view into the top most layer of the hells, but it is very unstable and I cannot communicate with any creature and hold the portal open at the same time. I could probably pull out an imp or a demon pixie. I doubt i'd be able to pull anything else out.

    Anyhow, i'll ask Syne, see if he knows what I can do.

    -Love Abiie.



  • Diary,

    My father thinks I am in the room he rented out for me, i've been just walking out of it recently. I think it might be bad to defy the word of a Tyrian warrior, but what would he do at best? Yell at me? Whatever.

    I woke up near highmoon, I couldnt sleep. I headed out of the inn to just walk around in the crisp air, I found myself walking to Sir Synes room, not on purpose more out of habbit. I knocked on his door, he opened it in one of his fancy robes and let me in. I brought him dinner, some chicken breast covered in orange glaze from the Ferret. He never commented if he liked it or not, i'm not even sure if he ate his, still, I thought it was good.

    I've been spending a lot of my time recently with him, he has a bunch of books that im reading through. A lot of them are about the Hells, he has actually put down paperwork to come help me with some of the harder reads. It's quite relaxing I must say.

    I enjoy it.



  • Dear Diary,

    I awoke and looked around. I didn't know where I was, I was confused, scared, nervous. I sat up in my bed and gripped my chest, my heart was pounding. I must of awoke from a nightmare, but where was I?

    I then remembered, i'm living with my father now. I actually woke up to Lucian, my brother, tugging on my sleeve to make breakfast. I usually get up around 4 in the morn, I don't know why I slept late.

    I made Lucian breakfast, pork links with eggs, then took a couple drags of pipeweed. He wanted to taste it, I wouldn't let him, I don't have a lot of it.

    He told my Father who wants to talk to me about it later, he better not take it away. This is fine elven vanilla pipeweed given to me by Syne.

    Speaking of Syne, I caught up with him later that day to talk to him about having to move out of his reisdence and back in with my father. I relized that if I did leave it just wouldn't be the same, I'm actually writting this entry from his desk. He is out picking up fresh fish and some fenberry pudding.

    I may tell my Father to rent out my own room and stay there once or so a week, the most of the time i'm going to hang out here. I still havnt put a dent into reading every book he has in his room.

    Theres something about Syne, something I can't quite put a finger on it, but something about him. He has a bunch of rumors about him, I want to figure out whats real and whats fiction.

    – Love Abiie.



  • Dear Diary,
    People are starting to notice me more. Instead of overlooking me as a girl I am actually noticing a few people following my path with their eyes as I walk by, people are noticing me as a woman. I woke up early, around three I think and headed out of Syne's room. He was busy with paperwork and was suprised that I keep getting up earlier and earlier. I headed out to the commons and bought an apple. I just sat there.

    It was too early to write in my journal, and too early to talk to someone, I got to enjoy a quiet morning, I tilted my head back and peered upward to the sky. It was a cloudy night, the sky was a mixture of black and gray, it really was a beautiful morning. I'm glad I was awake to see it.

    Mirkali woke up. He headed to the commons and sat by my, as usual. We talked about what we wanted to do, I wanted breakfast. Though there was this lass crying and he had to take care of her or some shite like that.

    My father came into the commons, I thought he has been too busy recently to even think about it, it's nice seeing him again. He and Mirkali had a back and forth scrabble of words before my Father took me out to get something to eat.

    I love when people call him, Tal.

    We got into the inn and he kept looking me over and taking everything I said the wrong way at first, I think he thought I was pregnant when I said I was hungry constantly. We got into a conversation about my mom. I asked what he would think if she were to die. He didn't care what happened to her. I hope he likes when I bring him a lock of her hair back.

    We started to talk about boys next, your average father/daughter way, he was freaking out everytime I even mentioned that I knew of some sexual stuff. Though I am still a virgin - he has no idea. I figure a few things are best left… unmentioned.

    I slipped up my tongue and spoke of how Syne has been caring for me this year. He went insane, as long as I can remember he has never liked Syne, he demanded that I pick my belongings up from Synes quarters and he would rent me out a room. I didn't want a room, I wanted to stay in his room if anything. I headed out and bought some ink, i'm going to need to talk to Syne about what my next move shalt be.

    -Love Abigail



  • Dear Diary,

    Things are quite confusing during this midwinter. I watched as some children celebrated some stupid fairy queen or something as a game they were playing in the temple. Morons.

    I have been in a bad mood for a long while, Mirkali said some things that I did not- well did not like. I did not like them so much I felt I should just run away. Further than away from my parents, I felt I should just run away from Narfell in general. Perhaps head over to that Waterdeep everyone always talks about.

    I packed my bagpack, I took about seventeen coin (all I have) and headed out the south gate. I was going to ask one of the caravan merchants which direction and they all laughed at me, they said I would have to go with a caravan to get there safely. I asked if I could come along, 300 gold pieces. Bullshit.

    I just took a walk in the nars. Without the marauders running about it is actually a pretty calm pass now. I got to the crossroads of Jiyyd / Peltarch and Norwick road. I relized something, I can't just run away. I still have a job to do, my mother still breathes and running away would be to… like her.

    I headed back to Peltarch, a bit depressed but thats not fatal. I had a nice dinner with Syne, later that nice he brought home sweetcakes and warm wine. It was a fine day, it made me feel a lot better. Syne is that kind of elf that you wouldn't expect to care for a human girl. He is a senator and elvish. Two things which would make him turn down any extra baggage in his room, but he doesnt turn it down. Syne is amazing, which is odd. He can do things like read your mind. I will have to ask him about that.

    Later I went to Mirkali's room to pick up my journal and a few things I left there. He freaked out about some minor thing, he healed a small bruise I had on my knee and gave me a massage, I don't know why I left him.

    The next day I saw him again, he went out with me to the hill overlooking the lake, my favorite spot. Which I now love even more.

    --Abigail Anne Uramesy.



  • Dear Diary,

    Everyone is stressed. Merydian and my father are "back together" but arnt living with each other, which I find fairly stupid. What is it with adults and love that they can't seem to grasp? Why do I always hear stories about younger people falling in love and doing so much for each other.

    Adults just look at everything in a giant picture, they try to disect things. What is there to disect about love? You either love someone or you dont. There is no inbetween. I can see that.

    My father I think is happier with Merydian back, but I don't see him much to know, if they get back together I might spend more time as a family again, like the good old days.

    Syne recently got loaded with a lot of paperwork, something about a senator becoming ill and his work being pressed upon Syne, it's bullshite really. I gave him a few days break from me and went to stay with Mirkali.

    The Mirkali that is also stressed, he has some choice or something he has to make soon but we're "not susposed to worry about it" he told me, so im not going too. I did spend the past two nights in his bardic quarters…

    a small heart is drawn in at the bottom of the page