3. Choices

Choices


  • I am not sure what I want to write about today. While I was talking to Yngdir the other day, I mentioned that I still had not been promoted to scout. Well, there was a woman there named Hen, she said maybe it was time I looked elsewhere. Now there is no way I am leaving the militia, after all, I do not really care that much about rank. Anyways, she said she wanted to talk to me, so we went for a walk. It turned out to be some kind of test. Wich I failed splendidly. So, no chance of a job offer there.

    A few days later, the gates were attacked. Syclya and I were fighting side by side, when a large demon ran right through town!! She and most of the others chased it north, while me, Val, and a few others stayed to protect the gates. Several hours later the others returned, without Syclya! I was frantic. No one would tell me where she was. So off I went to find her. I finally found her with Yngdir and Rasuil. She looked weak and badly shaken. She told me later that she had been killed!!

    She was saved by her God, Torm. He brought her back to me safe and sound. I will definately leave some offerings at his temple in thanks. Only Ras and Yngdir stayed with her, all the others left her. Maybe they did not know, but I know I owe Ras and Yngdir a big favor for this one. Even though I know they are honorable, and would have done the same for anyone.

    Finally, after Sy went home, we had another attack on the gates. More bugbears. There was a woman named Andrea, she was already badly wounded, and looked terrified. I gave her a potion and tried to stick close enough to protect her. Well, guess what I got for my trouble? An arrow in the throat. I am not going to Syclya's tonight. She would know what happened, and she has enough to worry about with her own recent visit to that Place. I just wished Selune would take as good care of me as Torm does of her.

    Well, good thing was, Andrea managed to survive. So, I guess it was worth it if it kept someone else from that Place.


  • Well, I have been spending ,more and more time with Syclya. She confided in me that she wanted us to be a family, with children of our own. She looked a little nervous telling me that. I think she was afraid I would run or something. She sure did get happy when I told her how much I dreamed of the same thing. We know we have to be patient. Neither of us has very much money, not even enough for a ring, let alone money for the things a child would need. I will find a way though.

    I have been practicing with some new weapons lately. Sickles, yep the ones that farmers use to cut wheat. They seem to do a lot of damage to zombies. And I am really getting good with them.

    I also went on a trip with Val and Ras. We went to some caves where the Koa-toa live. I helped Val carry out a huge amount of ore. Even with a spell I could barely walk with it all. Afterwards, when we split the loot, I was amazed at how much I made. If I can go and help a few more crafters, I might be able to afford our rings sooner then I ever dreamed possible.

    Well, time to wrap this up,, I promised Syclya that I would attend one of her classes at the apothecry. Maybe I can learn something about tending wounds, I sure get enough of them.


  • Went on a trip to a crypt. Sounds a litle poetic, however it was anything but. I would not have gone, I hate the undead, and I have very little that can damage them. Unfortunately, when Sy said yes she would go, well,, there is no way I would stay behind.

    It did not start out badly, a few skeletons and minor zombies. It quickly became much worse. First Sy was struck by a zombies blade, it must have been poisoned or something. She immediately began to get sick, and next it was my turn. Sy was being hardpressed, so I jumped in, trusting to my quickness to distract the zombie, thus giving Sy a chance to strike it from the side.

    Even though I could not cause much damage, the tactic seemed to work. The undead would turn to me, leaving themselves exposed to the far more damaging blows from my Love's blade. Then one of them got lucky with a dirty sword, and I became deathly ill. What a pair we made then. Both of us sick as heck, and nowhere near the end of the tomb. There were others along, in my delirium I am not sure of their names. But they did fight well.

    When we got back to the gates there was a woman with a bastardsword for sale. As I was examining it I noticed a look in Sy's eyes. I knew she wanted it. She always gives so much to the poor, and even spent some of her last gold on a gift for me. This was finally my chance to get her something she really wanted. It was worth every last piece I paid to see her eyes light up when she held it.

    Well, we finally arrived back in her room, and after she was able to heal us both, we were so exhausted we fell right to sleep. Let's hope for a quieter day tomorrow.


  • ThirtyEight: These mornings waking up here in this little room, with Sy still sleeping in our bed, are the most precious of my life. Can you believe that I am really looking forward to getting a house? It is amazing how people change.

    I finally told Sy about Starla. How we met. And how she died. It was the first time since she died,that I was able to shed a tear in her memory. I was worried that Syclya would not understand, but she did. She was very sweet, and even shed a tear herself. We talked a long time, and she told me things about her own life and family that she had never shared before. Her parents sounded like wonderfull people. Her mother was very understaning and kind. I wonder how different life would have been if I had parents like hers.

    And finally, I will no longer write in here if I get seriously injured or have to be brought back from that place. I saw Syclya reading some pages I left lying around. I think it causes her to worry more than she should. I will not be responsible for causing her pain. Of any kind.


  • ThirtySeven: I almost decided to not number these sheets anymore, untill a stray gust of wind through Syclya's window, scattered them all over the place. It would have taken forever to organize them without the numbering.

    And yes, I am in Sy's room again. We have managed to spend a few more nights together. Each has been better then the one before. And every evening, when she falls asleep, I walk to the window and give thanks to the Silver Lady. I thank her for helping me to find my one true Love.

    Yesterday morning I took the advice of that Spirit. The one in the fugue. I went on a patrol by myself, to see if I could be the kind of scout I should be.

    I went to the goblin cave in the howling woods, I really stirred em up. I had thrown a flask of fishguts in the entrance, and when they came boiling out like an angry swarm of hornets, I led them on a merry chase! I let them think they had me , and then I vanished on them. My sneaking has really improved over time, many did not see me untill my blades severed their heads from their rotten little bodies. There were, over a dozen, plus their trained wolves. When it was over, I was slightly wounded, but they were all dead.

    I believe that maybe Selune sent that spirit. She was probably getting tired of hearing my pleas for help every time I was killed. I look at this as a last chance from her. I have learned my lesson.


  • Thirtysix: I write this as I sit in a comfortable chair only two feet from our bed. Our bed. I like how that sounds. Sy is still sleeping, after all we had a heck of a long day yesterday. And we really did not get much sleep last night! It is amazing to watch the woman you love sleeping so peacefully, especially when just yesterday I almost lost her forever, twice.

    The first was when I ended up in the fugue after trying to save Hahn during an attack by goblins. I met a spirit there who asked me why I was not reflecting on my mistakes in life? I am afraid I was a little arrogant with him. But his advice was worth listening to. I always thought I had to pile in if someone was in danger, but as he pointed out, what good was I doing anyone if I died before I saved him. I am honestly trying to improve on that, especially now that I have even more to lose.

    The second time was during a later attack by hordes of wierd undead. They seemed to be after a group of noisy little Hins. While battling them Syclya was drawn into some kind of gateway! I panicked, I had no idea where it led, I only knew she could be in danger and the gate could close any second. So, I leaped into the gate with my blades drawn!

    Imagine my shock and relief that the gate led to the Nars crossroads. My love was safe. Then began the long run back to the southgate to help the Hins. A few more battles and then some mage turned everybody into badgers!! Thats right, badgers. All of us, for a period of time. I managed to become myself quickly but the others took longer. I was beginng to wonder what people would say about the crazy elf and his badger girlfriend, but then Sy was restored as well.

    And now we get to the good part, Sy inviting me back to her home. This is my first time here, and when I asked if she wanted me to stay, she said yes. She told me that she wants us to be a family. It made me so darn happy I almost started tearing up. I thank Selune every night in my prayers for blessing me with her.

    She is starting to awaken, I think I will see how tired she really is.


  • Thirtyfive: Well, another day spent at the hall, a few more knives made, and a little more skill earned. It really helps me focus.

    The plan is starting to come together, I have bought some supplies I will need, and there are volunteers to help me. All I need is to hear from Colonel Albryanna. If we have the help of the militia, then this can not fail.

    I am also going to contact Jerrick and the druids circle. They and the wolves would prove invaluable in closing off or patrolling most of the Rawlins. Thus narrowing the killers choice of approaches.

    And, I have Syclya by my side. I know she is worried for me, and would probably prefer we use different bait, but she supports me completely. She knows this killer must be caught and brought to justice. Hmm, listen to me, since when have I ever worried about the law instead of just doing what is right? Guess she is rubbing off on me afterall.

    Last thing. Thorn has a brother. I have not officially met him, but I saw him today. Syclya acted a little strange around him, and I thought they might now each other. Later she told me that they were once in love. But it did not end right. I think she expected me to act jealous or "rash", but how could I? In this whole messed up world there is only one thing I am sure of. Syclya's love for me. I would believe the sky was green before I would ever doubt her. After all, I myself have had loves in the past. Just none as true as her.


  • Thirytfour: I spent the entire day in the Crafters Hall. It was amazing how I was able to lose myself in the smell of the forge and the heat from the near molten metal. I only was able to craft a few knives, but considering how hard I was beating on the metal at first, it is a wonder I made any at all. The constant hammering in the hall helped to drown out the voices in my own head. It truly brought me a sense of peace that I sorely needed.

    And now, I think I have a plan. The murderer is not going to stop. So I figure, why not give her a victim of our choosing? We know she will be back, lets give her an easy target. Me. In disguise of course, and with friends rendered invisibile by potion and spell around us. I think it might work. We will see.


  • Thirtythree: I have got to get a hold of myself. I stalked the rawlins all day, killing every goblin I saw. Untill I realized, it was not them I was seeing when they died. It was her! Jaelle. It was her face over and over that I saw as I drove my blades home! Why? Why kill an innocent farm boy, or merchant? What possible reason could she have had? She never struck me as a coward. Never showed any signs of fear that I could see. Was it all just for pleasure?

    I wish Syclya was here. She has a way of calming me, keeping me from doing something, as Thorn would say, rash. I miss her strength, her sense of justice, and her love. And now I fear that if I can not come to grips with this on my own, I am gonna get myself either killed or jailed.

    If I am honest with myself, I know it is guilt driving my anger as much as sorrow for the boy's mother. Instead of doing my job I was playing and drinking at fightnight. That is about when I figure she must have killed him. Jaelle is almost always at fightnight. But not this time. this time she had other plans.

    I did promise Thorn I would not do anything rash. And honestly, giving him my word is the only thing holding me back.


  • Thirty Two: A boy was killed in Norwick. Not by goblins or wolves or demons, but by someone he trusted. It was murder, plain and simple. His mother came to us, saying he was missing. I looked for him, and finally tracked him to a cemetary on the cliffs above the river across from Jiydd. He was not alone, and the signs seemed to indicate he went willingly. That is where he was murdered. His body tossed into the river from the cliffs.

    When his body was found by a fisherman, he had been in the water for a couple of days, Benji found some flesh under his fingertips and gave it to Armuil the mage. Aramuil performed a divining and we discovered that the flesh was,,, Jaelle's !!

    I trusted her,, I gave her the benefit of the doubt when Jay killed Troff. I even spoke on her behalf! And now all I can wonder is, if I had not, would the boy still be alive today? Damnit, it is my duty to protect the people of this town! If only I had found him sooner, maybe I could have stopped her. Maybe his mother would not be crying herself to sleep at night. And maybe I would not feel this sense of shame for my failure.


  • Thirty One: I was invited by Z to go on a crafting trip. While waiting I saw Syclya, and when I asked her to come along, she said yes. Made the whole day so much better. I swear she is more beautiful each time I see her. I find myself torn though, I wish her to be safe yet I want her with me always. And we all know, being around me is seldom safe.

    Our trip was north to the gnoll woods. I had never been there, but with the group we had, I figured we would be ok. The gnolls turned out to be very good fighters, even their younglings. We were exploring a particularly eerie section of the woods when Syclya slipped on the edge of a hole and plunged to the bottom!! I never even thought, I just jumped after her. Well, maybe I slipped trying to grab her, but it is my story..

    I am glad I did though. When I got to the bottom she was under attack by two of the filthy stinking beasts! I pulled my blades and pounced on them! I even managed to kill one in the process. Kinda silly of me though, after all, my love is one heck of a fighter. Soon the rest of the party slid down to us and we,,,,,(( the rest of this entry seems to have had some type of wine or ale spilled on it,, it was quite lengthy though))


  • Thirty: Wow, it is hard to believe that I have been here in Norwick for over two years. And never even saw a sign of that jerk I killed back home. Probably has forgotten alll about me by now. But I am still never going back. This is now my home.

    I saw Sy for a little while this week, seems things might be turning around for us. We might even be able to spend some time together for a change. I can only hope.

    I ran into Tindra while I was on patrol. After we arrived back in town we shared a meal at the town fire. Somehow I began to tell her about my past, and about Starla. She is a good listener and we seem to share some of the same dislike for intolerance in others. It is nice to talk to another Selunite. We are far to rare. That's probably is why we tend to stick together. It is us against the world!!

    Last note, Eli took me on patrol and told me I was in charge, said it was some kind of test. I hope I passed.


  • Twentynine: Okay, this is getting rediculous!! I am really beginning to hate that place!! Oh! What place, you might ask? That horrible, cloudy, stormy place the priests call the Fugue! Twice in two weeks I get to visit it again. Once because of a sneaky little blood sucking vampire mage. Yea, you read that right. And then a stupid biting vine gets me after I managed to survive a battle with giant wyverns, harpies, and a couple of cockatrice!!

    The real problem is, I do not think I would have done anything different. The others say I should run, but how can I when I see someone I know in trouble? Am I getting some kind of message? I do not believe Selune would want me to be other than who I am. Perhaps I did something that I am unaware of, for wich I am being puished. Or, and this is the most likely answer, I am just down right unlucky.

    One thing for sure, I had better get practicing. I need to be a lot better at fighting since I obviously can not rely on luck


  • Twentyeight: How many times have I died now? Well add one more to the list. We were attacked in Norwick by some type of spirits. Aramuil called them chaos spirits. When they were killed they made something happen to the weave,, it caused all the spellcasters,including the clerics, to have massive headaches.

    I fell once but was healed by Jerrick,,he told me to run,,but there was a real big spirit swarming a guy named Noah. I just had to stay and help of course! Well it turned on me and next thing I know I am in the fugue. I might as well build a house there,,I go there so much!

    This time though, I heard a beautiful voice, it asked if I wanted to return. Well of course I did! I said yes and suddenly I am standing in the temple. A real pretty woman named Kara had brought me back by the blessings of Mystra. It did not even cost any gold, now that is what I call a nice lady. It was Feather who had carried my gear and my body to her. (Never thought Feather looked that strong).

    The battle against the spirits continued well into the next day, I do not think anyone else died. We eventually won. I was so glad that Syclya had left town before it all began, although she would probably have done better than I did. I still would have worried though.

    One last thing, Jerrick. I watched all the people pull together and rally against the spirits. And always in the thick of it was Jerrick. He might be reallly egotistical, but I must admit, if I could do all he can, I would be pretty full of myself to. However I can not deny his dedication to Norwick and it's people. I suppose he can't be all bad.


  • Twentyseven: Vampires. The name alone is enough to give me a chill to the depths of my very soul. A dwarf named Nulinus was attacked by one not far from Norwick. Several of us investigated, but found only the burnt pile of ashes. All that remained after it was exposed to the cleansing rays of the sun. Kabul said it looked like it was going towards a cave to the southwest. We decided to return to Norwick for reinforcements.

    We returned to the cave, just before dark. What a,(as Benji would say,) g>CLUSTERFARK!! There was no clear plan and some of the newer citizens just went rushing around like it was a normal raid. One even stopped to skin a worg before all the others were dead. I ended up on my back with a Worgs teeth snapping only inches from my face! It took all I had to keep it from sinking them into my neck! Needless to say, afterwards, we left rather quickly, and returned to Norwick. I have never felt so defeated before.

    On a more positive note, I did get to go hunting with Feather and Rasuil. It was my first hunt with only members of the wolves. I learned alot, makes me kinda wish I was one of them. They do seem to share a closeness that is lacking in some of the other organizations.

    But, that would make Jerrick my boss, or pack leader. I still have not made up my mind about him. Sometimes he can come across as an egotistical tyrant. And other times he seems like a hero from a legend. Which is it? Or is it both? And is that something I can live with?


  • Twentysix: Wow, does my head hurt. I was at the Graapevine lastnight with a number of people, and got real drunk. I did get to hear some real good stories, and met some new faces. By the end of the night some of those new faces were nearly naked! And when one of them left, I think her name was Caling, she was followed out by Ol'Stubs. When he came back in,, lets just say he looked a little rumpled, but in a good way! Boy, does she ever have a weird taste in men.

    I had Kabul show me a cave that has some ore in it he says. I will check it out soon. I need to find ore if I am going to learn how to make blades.

    Last thing. I went to visit Aelthes in Peltarch. The council there decided to keep him confined to the Temple of Selune. When I heard of it I naturally went to offer him my assistance. My devotion to Selune is nowhere near as great as his, but I felt a show of support might help to make his confinement more bearable. Untill we spoke, I never new he was a lycan. He does have controll of it, so it must be a blessing from The Lady. I hope they release him soon. He deserves to be with his family and friends.


  • Twenty Five: I now know what the bards mean by "his heart sang". That is how I feel today. I saw Syclya, and she told me she loved me. What more could I ask for. We still are to busy to spend much time together, but I know it will work out.

    On a sad note though, a little hin was killed today while trying to rescue Nulinus the dwarf. He gave his life for someone he barely new. His name was Bennie. They tried a ressurection, but it failed to bring him back. I believe he was happier in the afterlife. May his god keep him safe.


  • Twenty Four: The days are beginning to blur together. I practice constantly with my blades, and also my new longbow. I am getting alot better at sneakin around, and was even able to sneak up on a group of goblins that were attacking the town. I also have started using a new blade, a rapier. I really like the feel of it.

    But the nights are pretty bad. I find myself thinking of Sy almost constantly. I do not get to see her very often, and when I do it is often in passing, as we both seem to be constantly busy. But, maybe that is better. If we were together to much, we might get sick of each other, and end up seperating like so many of the couples here seem to do.

    There are some men here that have gone through a whole bunch of different women. And I am sure they all thought that it would last forever and they were the "one". That is not for me. Had Starla not died, I would never have even looked at another. I do not give myself out as a token to whoever is the newest face of the month. Only to move on to the next when boredom overtakes me.

    I have made my choice.


  • Twenty Three: I have not been in this good of a mood in a long time. Not only did I see Syclya today, but she apparently likes me as much as I like her. When I walked up to the fire at the town center, she was standing there speaking to someone. I could never tell you who it was, I had eyes only for her. She smiled when she saw me and said" Celad, Wait right here" and off she ran. Well, of course I did as I was told.

    She returned only a few minutes later with a package, and handed it to me. She said it was a present for me! When I opened it I was stunned, it was a new cloak and matching belt. And both had a slight enchantment. I know they must of cost her a lot of money. I thanked her and tried them both on. Perfect fit.

    Afterwards we went on a patrol to the hobgoblins area. This time it was me leading the hobbies into our traps. It worked so well that none of us received more than minor injuries. Again, she is my good luck charm.

    I am going to go to Pelt soon, to find a suitable gift for her. Something she is sure to love. I Wish we could have spent more time together, but we both have our duties. I will take what time I can, and pray to Selune for more.


  • Twenty two: Bad news. There was a baby killing jerk named Jay that was killed in Oscura. No that's not the bad news. The bad news is he is back. And he showed up in Norwick with a friend and killed a Legion member named Troff. He also attacked Jerrick. When I showed up, Jerrick was heading to Peltarch to find him(Jay). I went along so I would have all the facts for my report to Albry.

    We found Jay in Pelt along with Jaelle and a woman named Jack. Jack was the one who helped Jay. Jerrick was so busy threatening everyone that he would not listen to what they had to say. I do not like Jay at all, but I still wanted both sides of the story. So when Jerrick was done issuing his ultimatums (by the way, who made him king?) about them not being allowed in Norwick he left. I stayed behind. Jay was gone but I did manage to talk to Jaelle and Jack.

    There story was that Troff and someone named Gina had participated in the attack on Jay in Oscura. He was out for revenge, plain and simple. Jerrick just got in the way. In fact I do not believe it was about Troff at all that got Jerrick so upset. He even said " I don't care about them, you attacked me in Norwick". Sounds to me like Jerrick is just pissed that Jay beat him.

    When I got back to Norwick Jerrick and his wolves were trying to stir up the town about the killing. And there was Troff! Someone had been able to raise him. But it did not matter if the "bad guy" was trying to balance the scales in his eyes. Nope, king Jerrick wanted revenge!

    I told a Pelt guard named Yana the other side of the story, but it did not matter. Jerrick is gonna use the good hearts of the citizens of Norwick to get his revenge. How many are gonna get killed for him. Because no matter what he says, this is not about Troff. This is not about the mighty druid "balance". It is not even about the logical choice to end the life of an evil, baby killing, sychopath.

    It is all about Jerricks pride.