Under the Moon - Memories of a Selunite
-
Find a Focus
_It's been some months now since it happened. At times I'm still a bit confused by it all. All I can think of, is if I fail.. I need to let others that suffer the same to know how to fight it. Maybe my words will help them, maybe they won't, but I'll try at least. The problem isn't with it happening, the problem is in making sure you don't get filled by it, lose yourself to it. It's a struggle of wills, you must depend on your mind and Selune.
It will make you angry, find a focus, push it back.
It will try to come out, to take you over, find a focus, push it back.
It will make you want things.. you normally don't, find a focus, push it back.
It will make you feel pain, find a focus, push it back.
It will show you things that will tear down the strength of your mind, find a focus, push it back.
It will make you want it and you ~will~ want it, find a focus, push it back.
That's the biggest thing, find a focus and keep your mind on it. Not many are as lucky as I am, my focus is Lycka. Bonded to my soul and the feelings she puts across to me, as well as the strength she has inside, is likely why I am still here. Find a focus and keep it strong in your mind.
If anyone who suffers the same reads this, know that it will be a long and hard path ahead of you. Trust in Selune, find your focus and know that there is a brighter light if you don't give in._
-
_Outside the tavern, silence was there. The screaming had stopped, peoples houses were dark now, the lanterns and fires inside likely being put out as the commotion started. The moon was full in the sky, it's light enough for Aelthas to see flickering shadows moving through the dark alleys around the tavern. To his left, Sy'wyn stood there quietly, his nose twitching as if sniffing at the air to catch the scent of anything lurking in the darkness. Lissa behind them, her hand slowly trailing over the hilt of a dagger at her waist. She wasn't afraid, which made Aelthas crack a small smile as he looked back to the streets.
The moment he took to glance at his friends was enough, Aelthas muttering to himself that he should have known better as the first set of yellow eyes appeared along the side of the tavern, rounding the corner to close with the three. Before he could even think to get his sword out, Sy'wyn was upon the beast, his blade flashing in the moonlight, like a star shooting across the night sky as it sunk into the creatures hide, a painful howl erupting through the silent streets.
"What are the chances?" Aelthas thought to himself just before four more shapes rounded the corner, the same yellow eyes closing quickly on Lissa and within moments, he was changing, a deep growl coming from Aelthas as he lunged at the wolf closest to her. The wolf seemed startled as this once human tore into it with claws and teeth, the sweet smell of it's blood filling Aelthas' nostrils, the thrill of the kill filling him as the wolf struggled to keep Aelthas' teeth from it's neck. Finally his teeth sinking in, the taste of blood in his mouth, the wolfs life leaving it under the crushing jaws. "Don't lose yourself.." Aelthas thought in the back of his mind, but the wolf took over instead and Aelthas let it.
One wolf lay dead at Aelthas' feet, he turned to face the others and to his surprise, he saw Sy'wyn changed as well, his teeth sinking in for a killing bite on another wolf. Lissa was nowhere to be seen, then all went black as his instincts took over, the remaining two wolves jumping Aelthas from behind and knocking him to the ground, jaws snapping close to his face as they tried to get the kill. One sunk it's teeth into his shoulder, pain flared up in him at the bite, then the wolf let out a gurgled yelp, blood trickling out of it's mouth as the flash of steel appeared through it's throat. The second wolf turned to face this new attacker, only to get the blade across it's eyes, causing it to stumble back and yelping as it tried to get away. It made it no more then a few feet before the other werewolf was on it, ripping it's throat out and showering Aelthas with blood.
As Aelthas launched back up to his feet, looking down at his blood soaked fur, Lissa was beside him, grinning from ear to ear. Sy'wyn slowly moving off to his right, as if pacing the fresh kills, his eyes burning bright yellow. He kept his distance from his two companions, even Aelthas began backing away from Lissa, but her words caught his attention instead, rooting him to the spot._. "You two sure are some interestin' folks, ain't ya? But seems we got some bigger problems." _As she slowly pointed with her blood covered dagger down the street. A dozen eyes, maybe more caught the moonlight, moving in slowly, circling the three. "You.. are not a wolf" Echoed Sy'wyn's words in his head, as if trying to force him to change back. "Tonight we are.. and tonight we hunt together, brother." Aelthas answered back to the voice in his head, knowing he was about to cross a line he hasn't since first being infected.
Just as the howls filled the darkness, the red eyes appeared as the hulking shape of a beast burst into the street, snarling at the other wolves as if giving them orders. Sy'wyn was the first to move, the slender and shorter werewolf moving with lightning speed to meet the red eyed werewolf, Aelthas turning to Lissa and growling out a single word quickly.._ "Inside". _The sly grin that appeared on her face told him she wasn't going to go, but he had to try.
The rest of the night was a blur to Aelthas, wolves led by werewolves. The flash of steel, the howls of pain, the red eyes retreating into the darkness, blood covered fur and clothes, his eyes glazed over with red as he enjoyed the slaughter. Aelthas woke, the sun just peaking over the buildings, blinding him for a time as his eyes adjusted. Rubbing a hand over his face, it felt wet and smelled good. The taste in his mouth was wonderful, the taste of blood. The smell of meat cooking made his stomach rumble.
As his sight slowly focused, he could see Sy'wyn sitting across from him in the street, a small fire crackling, what smelled like duck roasting over it. Sy'wyn's face was clean, his armor seeming polished, as if all evidence of the night was gone or it didn't happen. His eyes, such a light green, peered at Aelthas across the fire, they had such intensity even when he was just an elf. He said nothing, just stared at Aelthas._
"They are.." Aelthas could barely get the words out before Lissa walked up, lightly humming a tune. "Gone.. for now." Sy'wyn added in as Lissa dropped down beside the fire. Her clothes were clean as well, a happy look on her face as she winked over at Aelthas.
"You could have woken me.." Aelthas paused for a moment as people began to come out into the streets now that the sun was fully up. The looks on the villagers faces one of fright as they looked at the sight around. Dead wolves littered the ground, massive wolves. Three human men lie dead amongst them, naked and bodies torn by claws and teeth marks. "..before everyone woke up.. I'll look like some monster covered in this blood.." Aelthas got a rag from his pack, beginning to wipe blood from his mouth and face at least before anyone noticed him.
"You look.. how you act.." Sy'wyn said quietly, his stare seeming to try and pierce into Aelthas' soul still. Before he added in a more casual way. "The Alpha.. got away. We should find him. Now eat." _With that, Sy'wyn got up and headed off to some of the dead wolves, began looking at people as if telling them to help him and the bodies started getting cleared from the street. Aelthas couldn't help but smile as that elf's look could say more then he could ever form into words. Lissa sat there, quiet and staring at Aelthas. They both ate, not a word said, the villagers going by once in a while and gave frightened looks at Aelthas and the blood covering him, though they said nothing.
After the meal was done and the bodies were cleared away, life seemed to go back to normal, or somewhat normal. People gave wary glances at the three strangers, though the occasional smile led Aelthas to believe they were grateful and none had seen what happened out here. Lissa seemed cheerful enough, talking with the villagers. Full of youthful energy as she joked with them or haggled for some mundane supplies. A laughter coming from her as she spoke to some. It all made Aelthas feel better. Lissa sort of reminded him of Lycka, excited by trouble, trying to always laugh.
Aelthas' mind drifted off to the south once again, to his family. He could see them all just stirring for breakfast. Lycka attempting to make something edible for the kids and giving up and heading off to get pancakes from the Mermaid. His worry about what happened the night before leaving him for some time, but it was only gone for so long. "What did I do.." He'd ask himself at times. "Why is Sy'wyn staring at me like that?" He tried to push it all away, it was nice to have someone not be totally afraid of him. He smiled off at Lissa as she looked back at him while trying to get a better deal on some simply cloth from one of the merchants, her returning the smile._
"Go.. get some.. milk." He heard Sy'wyn's voice as he got a swat across the back of the head. Aelthas could only chuckle and do as he was told, knowing there will be hunt again soon enough for the three.
-
The town was filled with many scents that assaulted the sensitive nose of the werewolf, the aroma of stew being the most prominent to him, his stomach growling as he walked along, Lissa seemed to hear it, looking back at him and grinning. "This way, we can get a meal at the tavern." _was all she said as she quickened her pace. Aelthas glanced back at Sy'wyn, watching him pull the hood of his cloak down a bit further to cover his face as they hurried by the townsfolk, a few looks being directed at these three strangers.
The tavern was a small building, the sign creaking in the wind as they walked up. "The Laughing Dog" written on a small sign in red paint, faded from the sun, a picture of a brown dog hastily drawn on a piece of wood as it dangled over the door, the scribbled drawing of a child by the looks of it. Aelthas stopping to stare at it a moment, his mind wandering to his own children and a small smile coming to his face, his hunger ignored for the time being._ "You daydream… much" _Came Sy'wyn's voice from behind him and a light nudge of his staff got Aelthas moving once again into the tavern, sparing one last glance at the sign.
The three quickly made their way to an open table and settled down, finally seeming to relax, Aelthas took the time to take in the tavern. The smell of sweat was the strongest, townsfolk coming to enjoy a drink after a hard days work. The ever present smell of the stew cooking in the kitchens, yet something seemed out of place, a smell that was somewhat familiar. Aelthas tried to put his finger on what it was, but the grumbling in his stomach was filling his head.
The three waited quietly for a few minutes, until a woman well into fifty winters by the looks of it came out to their table from the kitchens. Her size was larger then two of Aelthas put together, a kind looking face as she smiled at them all, the stains of cooking on her white apron, her voice was rough, likely from years of serving in a tavern Aelthas thought._ "Well, what can I get all o' ya?" She said as she wiped her hands on the already dirty apron she wore. "Some drink and some of that delicious stew I smell." _Aelthas said with a tired smile to her, the other two asking for the same. The woman simply nodding and heading off back into the kitchen to grab their meal.
The hours seemed to drift by, sitting there and enjoying the hot meal and ale. although it wasn't a king's feast, it was better then the rations they have been eating. After a second helping of the stew, Aelthas tossed a few coins on the table and pushed himself up, his body aching with the effort._ "I need a bed." _He said with a yawn to his companions, slowly heading over to the bar and yelling into the back for the woman again. Just as the woman emerged, screaming came from outside, immediately drawing the attention of all in the tavern.
Aelthas watched the door a moment, the people in the tavern seemed to do nothing, the smell of fear suddenly filling the room. With a few quick strides, Aelthas covered the distance to the door, Sy'wyn and Lissa at his side, obviously thinking the same as him. Suddenly, the tavern owner yelled out after them._ "Wait! You can't go out there!" She was afraid, but of what Aelthas wondered as he turned to look at her.
"Why not?" A simple question to answer, even for someone as scared as the woman was. Her arms shaking slightly as she stared at the three strangers in her town. She tried to stutter out the words, grasping at a small silver pendant at her neck, which was hidden under her clothes before. "It b-be the beasts, y-ye go out there.. ye'll be the next meal" Aelthas glanced at Sy'wyn and Lissa, Sy'wyn answering as always with a slight nod, knowing what Aelthas was thinking. Lissa just stared back at him, as if waiting.
"We'll be fine, lock this door after we are out and stay inside." Aelthas said quietly to the tavern owner, sparing one last glance around at the other people in the tavern, most of them not meeting his gaze, instead staring down into their mugs. Turning sharply, the three of them headed out into the night covered town…
-
The next day brought miserable weather. The rain coming down constantly as the three traveled by foot through the woods in between the magic used to move them. The air was beginning to cool a bit, the Glacier must be getting closer. The steam coming from the mouths of the three obscured their vision, thick clouds in the sky overhead and the falling rain making it worse.
"We need to set up camp.. or find a town to restock our supplies." Aelthas said sourly to the other two, his body feeling every ache with the dampness and after walking for hours, a break would do him and the other two good. Lissa herself made no comment, she didn't speak much at all as she followed the elf and human on their trip. Never asked where they went or when they'd get there, occasionally she would smile as she watched Aelthas tossing joking insults at the hooded elf, Sy'wyn would come back with a comment relating Aelthas to his father or would simply pull his hood down, cloaking his face even more, giving off an eerie feeling as he walked silently through the woods.
"We need to find…." Aelthas began to repeat himself, Lissa suddenly speaking up. "There is a town not to far from here. Ten or so miles to the west." _She glanced between Aelthas and Sy'wyn, as if looking for permission to begin taking them there, Aelthas gave her a slight nod and Sy'wyn just turned suddenly west, Lissa leading the way.
The walk seemed to go slow, fighting the mud as they walked, their feet sinking into it as they struggled up a hill dotted with evergreens all around. The whole walk brought a constant muttering from Aelthas, until Sy'wyn turned to regard him._ "You wished.. to leave. Now you complain.. cause you have no stone streets under your feet?" Aelthas just stared back at him, then suddenly chuckled, knowing he was right. "I'm a difficult man." The short comment brought a quiet giggle from Lissa in the lead, Sy'wyn shaking his head once again, muttering himself this time. The words hard to hear, but the comment included something of.. "Wolves.. in the city.." _Aelthas could only chuckle again, looking up to the top of the hill, his eyes passing over Lissa who stared back at him a moment, giving him a small smile.
A few more hours of travel, the time spent in idle conversation of the trees, the cursing of the mud, even Sy'wyn seemed to get tired of the muddy walk, even pulling his hood back at one point to stare up at the sky in what might be considered a glare for him.
Then suddenly the smell of fires came to the two wolves, Lissa seemed to perk up a bit as she knew they were getting close, most likely by knowing the town. The pace quickened and as they moved over one last hill top, the sun going down, the sky gray over-top and orange in the distance, they could see the familiar sight of civilization. Smoke slowly rising from chimneys and into the sky to fade into the grayness above. The smell of dinner being made in the homes, potatoes and beef was what caught Aelthas' nose first, his mouth beginning to water at the scent._
"Does this town have a name?" _Aelthas asked Lissa, even though he didn't care much for a name, he was only interested in the enticing aroma drifting up to the hilltop from the homes below. Lissa tilted her head as if thinking, then gave a small shrug and that seemed to be accepted by the other two as they made their way down to the welcome sight, to a warm bed, to a hot meal and a tankard of ale perhaps.
Aelthas was relieved by the sight, but he could hear.. feel something inside. A growling, something making his hair stand on end, a warning perhaps? He just dismissed it, the smell of the food more important. "Tonight I'm just a human.. and need a nice warm bed." Was his only thought._
-
The woman pondered the question as her eyes slowly moved over the two men by the fire. Finally, after a few minutes of watching and eating, the name came out. "Lissa."
"And what.. are you doing out here.. alone, Lissa?" Sy'wyn asked quietly, tearing off a small piece of the meat by the fire and raising it up to his mouth, it disappearing into the shadow of the hood that covered his face. His tone was one of curiosity, he had reason to be curious as to why this woman was out here alone and obviously for some time. How had she survived? Aelthas thought to himself. The girls eyes narrowed into a slight glare, as if the questions made her more cautious of these two strange men and why they wanted to know so much.
"You don't need to answer if you don't want too. You can share the fire tonight and be on your way tomorrow after a good meal if you wish." Aelthas says quietly as he studies her closely, waiting for any reaction to the words. Her shoulders sagged a bit and she shifted on the log she sat on. The weariness becoming more apparent the more comfortable she got. Sy'wyn noticed the same and reached into his pack, tossing her a plain wool blanket, an invitation to stay the night at the fire, safe from the things which lurked in the dark woods. Cautiously she took it, putting it to her nose a moment and taking a long smell of it before wrapping it around her shoulders.
"I've.." She started to say, before stopping herself and giving the elf and human another glance as if wondering if she should speak. Sy'wyn simply staring at her from under his hood, Aelthas turning back to the fire and his meal, both waiting patiently for her to speak when she wished. The hours went on, the woman drifting off to sleep as she curled against the log, until she finally spoke, startling the two of them as they sat there staring at the sky.
"I've been out here a long time.." She began quietly. "For months.. I ran from my town. They didn't want me there anymore.. I'm cursed."
The woman's story after just a few sentences interested both the men at the fire. "Cursed, aren't we all?" they both thought. Aelthas even letting out a small chuckle because he knew Sy'wyn was thinking the same as him. The woman curled back up in the blanket, taking the chuckle as an insult.
"Ignore the chuckling boy.. he is much.. like his father. Touched.. at times." _Sy'wyn added in softly to urge the girl on to finish her story and she sat back up slowly, taking another helping of the meal by the fire, now gone cold. Under the bright light of Selune and well into the morning, long after Lathander was shining down, this woman told the two men a story they would hardly believe, while both of them wondered if she would believe that she sat there speaking to werewolves of her visions.
The start that day was late, the two of them wanting to get back underway to their destination, the woman sitting there and watching them, with pleading eyes._
"She wants to come along.." Aelthas said quietly to the elf at his side and both looked back at the woman, sitting there huddled by the dying embers of the fire. Sy'wyn only gave Aelthas a look in response before he made his way into the woods, Aelthas turning to the woman.
"You have five minutes, get ready quickly, we need to move." _The words could have been the greatest thing in the woman's life by the smile that suddenly appeared on her face, a sight that even brought a smile to Aelthas as he finished gathering his belongings and helped her pack up before they both set off into the woods.
In the next clearing they found Sy'wyn crouched by a tree and as they entered he peered up at Aelthas and shook his head slowly._ "You pick up to many… strays." _Aelthas grinned at his friend, knowing that somewhere inside he didn't mind the woman coming along.
"We have three wolves now" Is all Aelthas could think as Sy'wyn muttered quiet prayers, the magic closing around them all, a bright flash of light and the journey continues to the Glacier._
-
So, day two away from home. Sy'wyn isn't one for talking, which is fine by me right now, I'm not in the mood to discuss much either, too much on my mind. We're taking our time getting there, seeing the sights as it were. The sights being.. well, trees mainly.
I'm trying not to think too much of home, I'm going away to get away from that place, to clear my mind of the troubles there and find myself once again. Getting her out of my mind isn't easy…
_Aelthas' writing trails off, a sharp snapping of a stick to the north draws his attention. Even Sy'wyn tilts his head to the side slightly, sniffing at the air before the two stare at each other. Another snapping twig and the rustle of some bushes confirms there is something lurking in the woods other then the two wolves around their fire.
Closing quickly on the small fire, Aelthas stomps it out and tosses some dirt on it to cover the smoke a bit as Sy'wyn crouches and slips off into the woods silently. Another snap and Aelthas closes his eyes.._ "Uses your senses." _He whispers to himself. His ears and nose suddenly filling with the woods. A rabbit running through the underbrush, covered in the stink of fear as it tries to escape whatever is coming. Sy'wyn, off to the north, unseen but the smell of another werewolf is obvious to him.
Aelthas creeps off into the woods a bit, hiding behind a large tree with a good sight of the camp, the cracking of his body changing fills his ears, the pain now gone or simply forgotten after changing so many times. Now the wolf begins his hunt, whatever this is coming his way is about to find something they didn't expect. Then suddenly Sy'wyn is back in the camp, sitting down calmly and looking over towards the large werewolf hiding behind the trees, his yellow eyes staring back at the elf.
Another scent comes to him as he waits, perfume. Unmistakable even when mixed with the sweat and dirt of a traveler. Then suddenly he sees her, crouching off to the west now, watching the lone elf sitting near the old fire, trying to get it rekindled again. Without even looking up, Sy'wyn speaks to the woman hiding._
"Come.. the fire will be lit soon. We have.. boar… again"
_The tension in the air seems to fade away, the woman slowly walking out from behind the trees, making her way to the fire Sy'wyn has gotten burning once again. She's cautious, she's afraid, the senses can pick such things up, by scent or by movements, she keeps her distance, her hand slowly reaching to her waist, a dagger sliding out of it's sheath, the grating of metal on metal like a booming in the werewolf's ears, a low growl escaping him.
The woman doesn't hear the growl, or doesn't seem to care, but Sy'wyn hears, and with a slight shake of his head, Aelthas changes back, walking out of the woods reluctantly with his hand on the hilt of his sword. The woman jumping at the sight of the tall and well muscled man wandering up to the fire, his eyes never leaving her. As he sits, he tosses a few more branches on the fire, his eyes finally drifting over to Sy'wyn as a small grin comes to his face._
"She smells of perfume, belongs in a city more then in the woods." _Is all Aelthas says as Sy'wyn even seems to get a slightly amused look on his face, pulling his hood down more as if trying to hide it. The woman still not sure what to think until Sy'wyn points to a log beside the fire, motioning her to sit. Aelthas tearing apart the meat cooking before and holding some out to the stranger now sharing their camp.
The woman moves forward slowly to accept the food, that's when he gets a good look at her finally. Although she is covered in dirt like she's been running the woods for months, her light brown hair unkempt, her clothes torn and dirty, she seems pleasant enough. Large brown, sharp eyes, as if they see all as she studies the elf and human sitting around the fire. Her brown hair well past her shoulders, twigs stuck her and there in it. Aelthas stares into her eyes a long time as she eats the offered meal, her staring back and he can't help but think that she'd likely be quite pretty if she got cleaned up a bit._
"Got a name?" He suddenly asks, as if trying to force those thoughts from his head, his eyes never leaving the woman as all three sit around the fire quietly, the two wolves waiting to know the name of the woman who almost became a meal.
-
_He sat across from the elf, his vision clear even through the darkness of the night, the small fire crackling, sparks flying off into the air; each like a small star. floating up until the cool night air took it's life. The smell of boar assaulting his nostrils and making his mouth water as he waited to gorge himself on the meal. The elf himself showed no sign of noticing the aroma, his face was like stone, his eyes barely seen under his hood.
The peace of the night was comforting. Sy'wyn put them in the middle of the woods, far from any civilization. The sounds of animals the only other sound other then the fire. He could smell a fox close by, hear it stalking through the underbrush as it hunted the delicious mice it so loved to fill itself on. Life was more simple in the woods. Hunt or be hunted, survive or die. Yet somewhere in the back of his head, there is always his Wolf at home, the feeling of sadness coming from her, longing to have her mate back.
After hours of not a word, the elf seemed to come to life, his words quiet as they always were._
"Why.. are you leaving your family?" Sy'wyn asked as he peered up through the dim firelight to study the man who was running from his home. Aelthas sat there, his eyes slowly shifting up to the elf across from him, regarding him cautiously for a long moment before responding.
"A wolf sometimes needs to run free, not be caged." Is all he could say at the moment, Sy'wyn shaking his head slowly as he said only a few words, that he has repeated many times already to the confused Selunite.
"You are not a wolf. You are a man."
_The conversation died there, the night went on, the fire died out, but the two just sat there, listening and eating the meal they prepared, no more words passed between them, no more were needed. A storm moved in, lightning slowly closing in from the distance, the sounds of the drops echoing in Aelthas' ears as his eyes scanned the dark woods, every animal that moved was caught by his eyes or his nose. A fight in the distance, silenced as one animal met it's fate in the great circle of life. Aelthas sat there all night, no sleep coming, watching his father's friend across the fire. He was the only one that could understand, the only one Aelthas knew at least.
Aelthas' mind wandered to his pack at home, how he would be coming home late tonight to tuck the children in as they slept and sit there and watch them before curling up beside his Wolf in bed. He left them though, to fend for themselves, but it was needed. His eyes drifted to the moon in the night sky as it peeked through the clouds and rain, knowing it would be shining down on all his pack._
"Watch over them, mother." He whispered to himself before he went silent again, sitting there and waiting for the rising sun to bring the next day to them. Perhaps there will be answers tomorrow.
-
Frustration
Frustration and anger is all I feel of late, darkness inside. Time to head north soon, it will be good to get away from this land and relax with the tribe on the Glacier. I'm supposed to be the wise one, I'm supposed to be the one to listen and help others, a priest of Selune.. yet I go north to speak to Ereeni about my problems.
I leave the pack behind and I'll miss them, but staying would be worse on us all. "You deserve a break" I keep telling myself, to get away from everyone's problems.. I should apologize to Tindra for the way I acted, but I can't bring myself to care about how she feels or what her problem is this time, what I do.. I do for me. Selfish of me.. but needed.
Maybe I just need a break, maybe I need more.. but at least it will be nice to have along Sy'wyn on the trip, he can understand what it's like, unlike the rest. Even Lycka doesn't understand, she gets angry cause I don't think the same way as before, her loyalties don't match up with mine as they always did before.. she defends the thing that causes my anger and frustration.
She's still my soul.. she's still my Wolf. This trip will strengthen me, then I can come home and tend to my pack again, every man needs a break. Right?
-
Samantha
Just when I think things are calming down a bit, I am ready to leave for a time to go visit Ragnhilds grave.. she shows up. Samantha, my Erinyes lover for my time spent in the Hells so many years ago.
Ronan simply wants to blast her with spells, I think she is showing up for a reason. Sam doesn't just appear for no reason, or without an escape plan. So attacking her does nothing in my mind, listen to her, let her say what she needs too, then leave. She taunts, she makes sure to rub it in when Lycka is there..
Lycka, gets images, memories of what happened between Samantha and myself, she still doesn't forgive me for it all, I can't even ask her to forgive me, she needs to do that on her own, when she feels the time has come. Her anger is apparent to everyone, her body so tense, her eyes narrowed, not the usual look of my Wolf. It hurts me knowing she can't forgive me, I thought when I went to the Hells.. it would be torture, they would cut me to pieces, try to break me, I went there to keep Lycka safe.. but the torture Sam had planned was worse than slicing me up.
Maybe Lycka would have forgiven me sooner, if I didn't give in and enjoy it.. a man can only take so much before his will breaks, even a man as stubborn as I am.
This time, Sam did have a reason for showing up, although I just can't believe her in what she says.. she is still a devil afterall. Our son, Baelthas, has rebelled against his devilish side apparently in some form, taking something from them that has them displeased with him. Sam wants me to tell him to go home if I see him and return what he took.. I think she knows I'll never do that.
So now, I need to find him, hear him out and decide whether he is indeed turning away from them or not. Lycka says she can't be there when I do see him, she just can't do it, it brings back too many bad memories for her. Ronan will just try to kill him and I don't expect any better reactions from the rest of my friends.. but he deserves a chance to at least explain what is going on before I sink Wartooth into him.. whether he's my son or just another part of Sam's game.
I'm alone it seems and maybe it's better that way.
-
The Jewel
It's been awhile since I gained control, mixed reactions from some. I had to prove to the Senate that I'm in control before they'd release me, Fisher looked scared at the thought, Shannon thought it was best for me to change and show them. The looks on some of their faces.. was amusing. Fear from some, some were amazed that it was actually true. I changed then changed back and they gave me permission to leave the Temple.
It took some time before my fate in the Defenders was decided, dismissal. No filthy beast can hold a position such as Captain it seems. I won't bother getting into how I feel about that, not now at least. Anger still has a way of setting me off at times when thinking of such things.
So I'm a stay at home dad now.. my children like it at least. I have all the time in the world now that I don't have duties to perform in the Defenders. The city is in chaos with the riots, since Lavindos death.. we still don't know who caused that.. and I can't seem to bring myself to care as I once did.
I'm free I suppose, free to do as I wish.. no worries of duty holding me back. My only concern is my wife, my children and my friends. I no longer feel like I have a whole city of thousands to worry about.
Lycka is busy at work, I sit at home and play with the kids.. I take long walks late at night, changing to howl at the moon each night, as I promised Ragnhild I would. At times, I feel I am losing myself.. I spend to much time as a wolf.
I need to find Eresse, an old friend of fathers and talk with him again, he understands.. I need to get away for a bit, just me and the wild. The city is driving me crazy, all the sights, sounds and smells.. I need to run free I tell myself, but that's too dangerous to believe in. Lyckas sad and angry that I want to leave for a bit, can't really blame her.. but the Jewel is no longer a Jewel to me, it almost feels like a prison.
-
Selune
So the final stage has come.. I'm to go to my goddess. I feel unworthy of such an honor. Why do I get to be so close to my goddess? Why does she see fit to give me such a gift? I shouldn't question it, I should feel happy that I'm going, the end comes on the moon..
The plan was simple.. Lycka goes to the Pass and starts to sing, trying to get the attention of the Star Harpy. Ronan sends word when it lands.. I go invisible and leave the city and meet them in the Pass and we go to the moon.. simple, right? It actually was simple for once.. I'm surprised.
After the short trip.. (Make a note, Star Harpy moves very fast and tends to crash land, much like Firthram) ..we landed on what I saw in my vision, a desert like world. Some normal creatures were there.. things you'd see on our world, some not so normal.. even a dragon. We tried to talk to it..
"Mmm.. tasty morsels" is all we got.. great, need to kill a moon dragon, some things never change. Luckily Ronan was there, his spells made short work of it and we collected the parts, hoping we could enchant something later, no use letting the body just sit there on the moon, right?
The strangest part was when we found the pool of water I saw in my vision, there were mad elves all around it, all seeming to have gone crazy. At first we thought the one was going to talk.. he babbled something odd to us then attacked with his friends, the fight wasn't easy either.. tough Touched moon elves. Shouldn't surprise me there would be Touched people on Selune herself..
Now the pool, it wasn't blue like water.. it was green and Jerrick went in, saying it was poisoned. Was I supposed to go in myself? To many questions, so few answers. In the end, I gave Lycka one last kiss and walked in, hoping it was the right thing.. then I appeared.. behind me. Sort of confusing to see yourself glowing green. Something inside of me told me this would be a fight.. not some simple meeting, the poison inside of me, put there by the Sharran when he tricked me, was coming to life.. it was sort of an internal struggle, a fight outside of my body, to win over my body, to cure myself inside.
The fight was long, Jerrick seemed to find something in the crates near by as well.. he jumped back into the poison pool and handed it to me, telling me to drink while he took over the fight against.. the other me.
Not sure how to explain the feeling when I drank it.. I guess it was like my whole body was on fire for a few seconds, then everything just seemed to open up inside me, I could hear the wolf howl in my head.. was it a howl of victory? I'm not sure.. but when I looked at the other me just then.. I let out a growl and it was echoed by a growl inside, I changed.. on my own. I called him out of me.
Jerrick, Ronan and Lycka.. they stared at me, their weapons ready, Ronans fingers wiggling a bit like he was ready to cast a spell.. but it was me, just in another form and it felt odd.. I just walked up to Lycka and licked her face.. they all seemed to relax then.
I remember Lyckas smile still.. she knew right away it was done, that I passed Selunes test, that I was in control and the whole way home, sailing through the stars once again, the sight of such a thing before me and all I could think of, was her smile. How proud she felt, how relieved it was done. The effect my Wolf has on me, she is everything to me.. even as I become a werewolf, sail the void, face down dragons, all I have in my mind is her smile.
Somewhere though, in the back of my mind.. I know it isn't over. Never let your guard down.. never believe it's over. I think the struggle has just begun really.
-
Quiet
_It's been quiet of late, a few goblin attacks on the south gate, a few personal problems it seems between people which ended in death. Not my concern at the moment, it hurts sometimes to ignore such things.. but I have too much to worry about. I need to find a way to get to Selune when summoned..
Quiet never lasts it seems.. Sogar, an Oscuran Peacekeeper comes to Norwick, he keeps looking my way.. great, another Oscuran likely looking to attack me from behind like some coward. Then the arguments begin, about him wearing his helm and carrying a sword in Norwick.. then he blurts it out to Eli.. "Do you take orders from a werewolf?". I actually laughed a bit.. these southerners are used to lycanthropes somewhat due to Tindra, I expected some reaction, but nothing like I might receive in the city.
They casually glance at me, I admit it, they shrug a bit. Then some start pestering the Oscuran.. guess your plan didn't work out Peacekeeper..
He accuses me, saying Elendel filed a report that I attacked him.. I still laughed, despite already knowing that the elf was trying to bring charges against me in Oscura. Seems the elf has many enemies even down there that will help a Blooded like myself out.. Blooded, I've never broken my oath and they still consider me of that city. I tried to have the title removed, but no answer came.. I'll go talk to them sometime, tell them the truth, under truth magics if needed.. with my helm off, unlike the elf.
After some time.. all calms down and I'm sitting alone to the north a bit, thinking.. it's time, the Senate must know, I feel they might likely have me gutted on the spot as some beast.. but I wanted them to hear from my own mouth, not by rumor.
So I make my way north, but my mind keeps drifting from my own life that may shortly be taken.. to Maya. She's still in trouble.. the next story.. I care about her, a lot.. consider her a good friend.
I hope she is alright. I'll visit her before I tell the Senate._
-
Assassins
_I thought to take a walk in the Pass the other day, I had no idea it would turn so deadly and interesting. The elf Elendel wanders along in front of me, can always tell the bad apples by their dark, doomy looking, spiked helms. Not to mention the scent of them on the wind. I was tired and content to leave him be for the moment, despite what I hear about him.
Until he decides to run off.. why is he so nervous and running off from me? Well, let's find out. Sometimes my curiosity leads me places I wish it wouldn't. So I go invisible, giving chase and lose him, until I see him wander out of the trees near the Rat's and Bats. He starts talking to me, so he can see through invisibility, interesting. Potion maybe, or scroll, or maybe some of his equipment. Be curious again to find out. Of course he needs to start threatening me, so I call him a drow, tell him he could ease everyone's fears and just take the helmet off, but he won't.
Then the boar appears.. another piece to my puzzle. After a short talk, I notice the boars lips moving this time and when asked, he says he has been on this plane too long. Fair enough, I'm no expert on the effects it might have on other planar beings..
So I drink the potion he offers as a "cure", Aelthas, you idiot. The image of the boar changes to that of a armored man, it's obvious what he is to me. The darkness of a Sharran is fresh in my mind from Corde. As is typical, I give him the chance to come to Selunes light, the elf having gone invisible at the sight of the boar alone, had hoped he ran off. With the Sharrans mocking reply, I attack.. then it comes to me, I thought I could smell something wrong. The elf comes from invisibility to attack me from behind after having prepared with magic to do the attack.
A short battle that was, as the two of them take me down, the Sharran actually saying he is mine and going to fight the elf, the elf killing him.. and in a way, doing my work for me.. some amusement at that in the back of my mind, Lycka reaching out for me through the bond, knowing of the attack, she's worried now…
I'll remember the elf's words for some time.. "Now, what purpose could you serve, so that I will spare your life?" He tries to bribe me to help him get rid of these drow rumors.. confirming them in my mind. A laughed response, the threats of souls being taken.. you fool, my soul is Selunes and you have no idea what you are about to see. The anger building in me, accept it or die likely.. the laugh I let out turning into a growl as the words come from my mouth.. "My soul belongs to another." Then it takes me, surprise is all I can think as my wounds seal up, I start to snap at him and claw, a long growl coming from me...
With one swipe of his sword deflecting off of my wolfish hide.. and a large opening in his plate by my claw.. he went invisible and fled quite quickly. I swear I could hear the wolf howling inside in a mocking laughter sort of way.. satisfaction.. run, run forever, because you will soon have a wolf on your trail and he won't give up the scent easily after this attack..
I ran after that, as any wolf would.. to hide in the woods, perhaps hunt a deer. Then she appeared.. the celestial, her voice so calming, I snarled, but for some reason, she calmed me as I changed back, exhausted from all the fighting.
Relief came over me as she told me the boar was fine, then fear as she told me the bottle I drank from, that the Sharran offered, was a poison that will turn me into a Doom Knight.. then again a change.. surprise, I'm going to Selune? My cure is up in the dark sky.. on Selune herself.. she left then, I sat there with Attentus, who showed up during it..
Selune.. I've never spent so many nights staring up at, all night, my eyes would not leave. I'm going there?_
-
Cormyr
_The boar came again, told me that I must go to Cormyr, find the plant of Hope. These riddles, nothing is ever simple. Luckily, Jerric knows a druid who came from Cormyr, he might know what plant this is and will likely know what it's uses are and so, will understand why I need it and what I am. A risk that needs to be taken. It took a couple days until he figured it out, being away so long isn't easy to remember every detail, even of your own home. So we get ready to go to Cormyr. No idea how we'll get there, I thought maybe Bingo could help us.
Was it Selune shining down on our little group? Or something else? All I know is that this woman appeared at the right time, Celesta. She says she is from Cormyr and can help us get there. So the five of us, Jerrick, Lycka, Ronan, Tindra and myself, we get ready to go. We all get into this big hug with the woman and a bright light comes.. almost blinding then it's gone and we are in Cormyr. So is Locrian and Rain.. I felt bad for turning away Rain, apparently she was trying to help pull Locrian away as Albryanna ordered him to not jump in on the group teleporting. They were told it was a personal matter back in Norwick.. I guess we'll simply move on without them, leave them at the fort.
The Cormyrians were engaged in a war with orcs it seems, the border fort full of tired and hungry soldiers, bloody and dirty civilians. The Mayor was nice, a follower of Savras. When I tried to explain why we came, he already knew.. All-Seeing.. great. He told us there was a Selunite priestess who could help, but she went missing in the crypts near the fort. To find the Shriveling Hope, we needed to find her. We've been in crypts before, shouldn't be to hard.. right..
The battle wasn't all that bad, until we came to the flooded section of the crypts. Giant skeletons and drowned undead, who seemed to force water into your lungs as you fought them. I'll remember how it feels to drown, as I almost died fighting them. The giant skeletons bashing on me as the others tried to force their corrupted water into my lungs. If not for my friends quick actions, I would have drowned right there, on stone ground.. what a story that would have been, drowning on land..
The priestess was a bit further in, Penelope, a beautiful woman herself, despite being a bit worn and dirty after being down there so long. We helped her fight the "lord" of the undead, it went down quickly with one spell from Ronan.. that Undeath to Death spell is handy.. and after returning to the Fort, Penelope gave over the plant, thinking it for Tindra at first.. but she was told the truth.
We have the second ingredient to the potion.. we rid a crypt of undead and their Master and we lost no one doing it.. a good day if you ask me.
He has been quiet inside.. sometimes I forget he is there, which is dangerous. Need to remember to keep my mind focused on holding him back.. I have no doubt he will try to come out again, despite our common ground we found, the peace we found at Ragnhilds death.
Keep your focus.. push him away. I'm starting to believe control is possible now. "We can live together" I keep saying that in my head in the hopes he hears me.. and I believe that we can._
-
Senses
_My hearing is better, I can hear Jonni at times upstairs, while I'm downstairs on the couch reading. Can hear him mumbling in his sleep about being a Knight. I can hear the birds so clearly in the morning, singing their songs outside, or a rat scurrying across the floor of the barracks. Lyckas heart beating as she is beside me in bed, the steady thumping of it all night long, ringing in my ears.
My sight, even in the darkest of nights, under even a soft light from the moon, it's like the world is lit up for me to see everything. I wonder at times if my eyes glow at all when I'm seeing things like that. I can spot a deer running through the woods at a hundred paces at midnight. The normal activity of the docks as I go to visit the Temple, meetings in the dark alleys, never escape my notice anymore. My nose picks up individual scents now. It isn't as good as it could be, but I can tell when someone is coming up and if they are well known to me, the scent that follows them. Lycka stands out from quite a distance, as does Tindra. I seem to notice the scents of women more, not surprising.
It's not surprising that it's getting better, that comes with being part animal I suppose, although sometimes me senses confuse me, let me see things a bit more than what they are.
People change shape in front of me almost, one woman into a drow.. does that mean she is a black hearted bitch? Belia and Lycka turned into werecats, Lycka while she was in my lap. What does that mean? What are my senses telling me? Adriells dire wolf turned into a beautiful elven woman. Is she really a elf polymorphed into a dire wolf? Or is it more that she has a heart of an elf even though she is a wolf? A beautiful "person" on the inside, caring, loving? That rat in the Rat's and Bat's.. it turned into a wererat, does that show it has above normal intelligence compared to most rats?
It's hard to figure it all out, Adriell told me it's my senses showing me things I've never noticed before about people and creatures. As no one else can see these changes except me, I guess that's the best explanation I will find for now. I wish I could explain it better to Lycka, but I can't. I fell like I'm Touched when I see such things, like I'm losing my mind a bit.
I miss Adriell, despite our bad start, she was a nice person and she was helping me understand this more. I hope she comes back soon.
You're not going crazy.._
-
Glacier
_Go to where the mother wolf fell, there you will find a plant to begin your path.
Those words still ring in my head. I wasn't sure what to think about going to the Glacier, to where Ragnhild died. I was filled with sadness, something I've tried to block out all came flooding in at the mention of the place she fell. I miss her so much, she was a guide for our whole pack.
The trip was simple, we booked passage on a ship leaving Peltarch. It would see us most of the way there at least. Saves walking. Our trip went fast too, the nice couple that owned the ship got us there with their crew quite quickly. The Glacier, the home of the tribe, the place where even I lost so much and have been trying to deny it all this time.
As expected, white wolves and frost giants covered the land, at first, some tried to barter peaceful passage with the wolves, I gave them their chance until one breathed it's frosty breath on one of our group, then it was time to fight our way through. The battle wasn't to hard and at times our group would argue about attacking the wolves. I finally had enough..
"You don't like that they are evil creatures and attacked us first, then go back.. we have no time for these arguments" Sounded harsh when I said it, but we really didn't have the time.. I didn't.. I need to get this finished..
At the top of the small mountain of ice was the frost giant camp, after fighting through all their attempts at killing us, we came to the Chief and his bodyguards. We did ask nicely for the plant we sought, but after fighting and killing so many of his tribe.. I already knew he wouldn't give it over. The challenge was issued, Shannon went to step up to accept.. I stopped him..
"I can't ask this of anyone, this is for me to fight" I said and right away could feel the fear building in Lycka, she thought I was going to die up there.. I honestly thought I would die up there. But I had a few tricks up my sleeve, magic was allowed and they didn't state from where..
With Ronans help, and Lyckas, as well as Shannons, Jerricks, Tindras.. so many to thank. I prepared to go up and fight this Chief for the plant I needed. A few little surprises I had in the my belt aided it greatly too.. the Ethereal Visage, Acid Shield and stoneskin made short work of the giant Chief.. my sword striking him down without a single cut on myself.
His bodyguards stood there a moment, looking at their dead Chief.. surprised he fell so easily. I asked them if they wished to challenge as well.. maybe the fact that the Chief died so easily and that I had ten of my closest friends at my back swayed their decision and they simply heading down the small ice mountain, running at full speed as they hit open ground.
The plant is there, I reached for it, but once my hand got close.. it was like something was tugging at me inside. I couldn't control the change this time, it just came out, something about the plant perhaps, maybe it could smell what it was and it didn't want me having full control. I attacked Tindra, luckily, Ronan held me in place with his spell.. that annoying green hand.. Lycka soft words coming through all the rage and hunger inside.. I'll never forget the song she sang..
The first part is complete._
_The song of my Wolf, forever ringing in my ears, the soothing of the beast, my focus.
Come to me
I'll take care of you
protect you
calm, calm downYou're exhausted
come lay down
you don't have to explain
I understandYou know : that I adore you
you know : that I love you
so don't make me say it
it would burst the bubble
break the charmJ u m p o f f
your building is on fire
I'll catch you : I'll catch you
destroy all that is keeping you down
and then I'll nurse you : I'll nurse youYou know : that I adore you
you know : that I love you
so don't make me say it
it would burst the bubble
break the charm~Come to me - Bjork~_
-
Loss
_I have been thinking how to put this into words, the pain of the loss I felt that day. I still can't accept it, it rips my heart in two just thinking about it.
Lycka and Ragnhild were gone for several days, the bond I share with my Wolf is odd at times. I can feel her off to the north, I can feel her fear and anger mixing together, a black cloud over my heart and soul. Somewhere in there though is her courage, her fierce determination to see it to the end, shining through like a bright light amongst the darkness. Think of a stormy day, where the sun tries to force it's way through the clouds and rain, that is the best way to describe it. Little rays of light, hoping to soak the earth once again.
The days go on as I know Lycka is fighting. I don't only feel her, at times, it feels like the bond strengthens, I see flashes of battle around me as Lycka focuses on them. Aurilites bleeding in the snow, large armored polar bears, deafening almost as they let out a cry for blood. Lycka is worried inside, almost like she is alone, Ragnhild must not be with her. She is likely off fighting with her Sisters of the Spear.
Then it hits..
She is torn away from me, all goes black inside.. the bond is severed. I know inside right away that she has died.. the pain starts to fill me, the loss of my Wolf. I felt myself die right then and there, as if half of my soul was suddenly taken from me, the light that keeps the darkness away. I remember screaming out for Lycka.. my eyes started getting sharper, but were filled with a red light, as if blood was all around me. My body felt on fire as the beast tried to grab a hold in a moment of weakness..
The scream must have woken Tindra, as I turned to look back at the bed where my four pups were sleeping, Tindra standing over them now yelling at me.. I couldn't hear what she was saying, but I could see her slowly changing, the children behind her crying, as they huddled on the bed with each other in fear. I was changing.. I needed to get out of here..
I woke up in the woods, dead goblins all around me, the ground soaked in blood, assaulting my senses with it's sick smell.. it's sweet smell. I'd find out later that I burst out through the door when the change came, trying to get away from the pups.. at least I seem to have some measure of control over this. Despite losing myself, I managed to get away, instead of changing right there.. the pups will be safe with Tindra, I can't face them right now.. not the condition I'm in. So I stayed there, under the tree in the rain, naked.. with the blood of the goblins and their dead bodies all around me.. and I cried. Every once in awhile I would smell an animal come near, a low growl coming from me.. a warning to stay away and they did, they left this wolf alone, in his misery.
Once my mind was focused, I could feel her once again in me, she came back as she said she would.. I wanted to go to her, to be with her.. but I could feel her holding me back. She was tired, but alive and the determination she had before was brighter than ever across the bond. She would continue to fight her way to the end, to save her tribe.. while I continued to wait here, wishing for nothing more in life than to hold her again..
I spent days wandering the woods, I stayed close to Tindra's cave, but couldn't bring myself to enter. I waited for my Wolf to finish what she needed to do, I waited for her return and that of my mother.. and what felt like an eternity finally came, the end.. Lycka seemed to drop inside, exhaustion and satisfaction filled her.. she did it, they did it.. I was so proud of her, I thought I would head back to the cave to tell Tindra and the kids that mommy and grandma were coming home..
The flashing images of the Spear Maidens, standing over over the body.. unbearable sadness filling my Wolf as she looked on.. the images fading in the mix of grief and anger. I knew she was dead.. the Alpha had fallen to protect her pack.. my fears were true, my mother wasn't coming home.
I didn't fight it that time. I simply walked into the woods, embraced the beast inside.. and for the first time, it felt natural to change. Throughout the night, our howls of mourning echoed across the Rawlins, the howls of other wolves accompanying them as we cried out for one of the pack.. for our Alpha.. for Ragnhild. I remember it clearly, sitting on that hill.. Selune heard our eerie howls of prayer to see her along to the next life..
That's the night I finally realized that I wasn't so different from the thing I've been calling a beast.. that's the night he and I found some common ground in our mourning, that I realized he cares for our pack in his own way as well.. that night I accepted what I am..
That night I swore to Selune that I would control this, that I would howl to Selune in remembering my mother every night, alongside the songs of her daughter, once I gained that control. I try to be strong for Lycka, she lost so much.. but I struggle inside and I don't think my pain at the loss of Ragnhild will go away anytime soon.
I miss you Ragnhild, may you find green fields and good hunting my Alpha._
-
Attraction
_I've had many times when I felt the urge.. to mate. Not with just Lycka. The most amusing of times now that I think about it was in the Peltarch commons. Lisa walked out with her new Guard dog Trixie. A female.. talk about awkward. My nose has become sensitive and she was in heat. I could smell that she was eager.. and willing, standing there with her tongue dangling a bit out of her mouth, all seductive.. I could feel the beast inside stirring..
Seductive? Her tongue? Really.. this is what I deal with..
"What are you doing?!" is all I could say to myself..
Lisa kept me there talking, showing off her new dog.. "Aelthas! My new Guard dog Trixie. She's been doing well in sniffing out criminals all over the district. We're thinking of breeding her, she's got it in her to do this, she's got good blood for the work." Lisa rambled on..
"Aye, good blood.." was all I could get out as my eyes trailed along her fur, soft fur.. that perfectly fluffy tail wagging slowly back and forth, as if enticing me to..
BEWARE OF FEMALE DOGS IN HEAT!
I ran away from Lisa and Trixie.. to the hills.. I could see the look on Lisa's face as I looked back.. a look of.. "What the hells is his problem?". Lisa, you don't want to know. Lycka did tell me she refuses to be jealous over a dog.. which is good and sounds a bit odd to me..
So leaving aside Trixie.. we have other women about, especially the female druids who turn into wolves. Belia, she smells good as I sit beside her, I can't help but lean over a bit and sniff at her hair as she sits there. She just laughs usually.. or wags her tail when she's in wolf form.. thanks Belia for trying to tease me. She isn't the only one.. Adriell before she left.. I really need to avoid female druids..
Living with Tindra isn't easy. I have had a crush on Tindra since I was a young lad, I think I still have it, although these days.. it's more turned into friendship and respect, I just refuse to leave my childhood, or what little I had of one, behind. I try to sleep in the cave, I can smell her in the other room and it takes all my strength of will to stop myself from going over there and sniffing her.. or worse.
I thought women were hard on me before.. this is a hundred times worse. Not only do I need to worry about women.. female dragons, Erinyes.. now I need to be careful around dogs and wolves.. by Selune, I need to get this under control soon.._
((Special kudos to Clandra for the little Lisa Guard dog event, for making me laugh waaaay to hard on an otherwise boring day!!))
-
A Broken Pack
_The problems get worse to the north. The tribe is in great danger.. Ereeni comes to Lycka and tells her that she is needed, her and Ragnhild both. Another tenday or so and they leave. I will be alone with the pups. Luckily, Tindra has agreed to let us stay in her cave. It's quite cozy there, for a cave. Tindra has a music box, the children will love that.. help them drive us crazy as we await Lycka and Ragnhilds return.
I've spoken to Jerrick and Belia as well, for the nights of the full moon. The children must be taken from Tindra's, no one can be there but me. I change then, I manage to get out of the secure room, I'll be going right for the kids likely. I can't take that chance, so the Glen is the best spot for them, they like the druids anyways, how they shapeshift and tell stories of the woods. Four nights each month, Lycka and Ragnhild won't be gone that long I hope.. a month at most if Tymora shines down on all of us, then they will be home and safe.
Yet.. I can't stop from getting this feeling in my gut.. as if something is wrong, or is going to be wrong. It gets worse as I look at Ragnhild. She's lost so much since Zoma.. she's only had us and the kids really keeping her here, yet now, she seems to have that fire back in her eyes as she gets ready to head for war. I don't think she's coming home.. and to think, I never once told her that I loved her, as my mother, as my Alpha.. I never once expressed the caring a son should for his mother.. and she -is- my mother.
So I sat there, watching Lycka and Ragnhild getting ready to leave, a few more days.. Lycka knew something was wrong with me, she'd keep giving me these little sad smiles as she worked away, as I watched her so closely. Then it came out one day.. I just stood up and walked up to Ragnhild and said it.. after all these years..
"Alpha.. I love you. I feel like I've been a failure to you as a son, I've never shown you the caring a son should give. I want you to know though, before you leave.. you are my pack and I will always love you the way a son should love his mother."
A loving smack upside the head, then those strong arms around me in a hug, my eyes actually filled with tears.. I hadn't cried in a long time, but her words hit me so hard.. being as simple as they were.. yet getting so much across to me at the same time.. I couldn't help but smile.. even tears in Ragnhild's eyes.. rolling slowly down her cheeks as she spoke in a soft voice..
"Love, pack, these things need no words to be real, pup.. you are not son of my blood, but son I chose. Vorthy not juss of daughter's love, but mine."
Lycka joined in on the hug then, her eyes filling with tears, happiness coming from both her and myself as we stood there, hugging each other, being a pack.. but sadness crept across the bond from us both, maybe we both knew that this might be the last time we did this..
We went back to preparing.. or they did at least. I watched them, taking in both of them with my eyes as much as I possibly could, it might be the last time I had this chance. So I enjoyed our pack, while it was still one.
They left a few days later, I watched them leave.. I tried to keep a brave face for the kids as Lycka and Ragnhild smiled over to us one last time before disappearing in a flash of teleportation provided by Leanna, a quick way to get them there and hopefully home as well, back into my arms. The pups were crying, wanting their mother and grandmother.. and despite all my attempts to control it.. hot tears rolled down my cheeks as they left and I gathered the kids up and headed south to Tindras.
Be strong my Wolf.. be strong Alpha.. come home to your pack.. and then I could feel him, inside, not angry, not looking to come out.. a long howl in my head only.. as the beast mourns the pack leaving..
Maybe we aren't so different.._
-
Dragons
_As a break, to try and take my mind off the struggle, I decided to focus on another problem. The Dracolich of the Hungry One. So.. I did something really silly when you think about it really. I sent messages to a few dragons. Really.. what was I thinking?
Argentius was the first to appear, leaving a message for me at Norwicks south gates. To meet him by Sam's Hill.. or Hole as it is now. Lycka and I went there right when we were told and there he was, flying high in the sky, I couldn't help but smile at the raw power he gave off just flying through the sky. He is majestic.. remind Lycka to finish that picture of him as an offering. He would hopefully be flattered by it.
The news he gave wasn't good. The Dracolich is beyond his power even.. a dragon that can run Rass off in a few mere moments, stands no chance against this monster we face. She is the story of fear that is told to all wyrmlings, to haunt their nightmares of what could happen should they act as she did. That… doesn't help us feel confident at all. He did have some good advice on how to kill her though, how we needed to get her down underground, where she can't fly off.. as she will fly off at the first sign of losing the battle. She isn't stupid.. but we first need to find her stone before we can finish her anyways.
He said he can't help anymore than that.. if he faces her, he will be torn apart in moments. I guess I shouldn't have hoped to hard that he would come to battle with the people of this land once again.. but right now, we all need some sort of a miracle..
The second dragon appeared a few tendays later. Lady Faye, my dragon of pink.. I stare upon her as some follower might. I find her beautiful, she is pink after all.. and majestic in her own way, despite being young compared to Argentius. She is unique..
I remember the first time we met, Rass had appeared in the Pass, Lycka and I just got together, we were courting. After Rass flew off, Faye swooped down in front of Lycka and I just outside the Camp.. all the others had run off after Rass. I of course, was in my pink armor, bearing the pink dragon on shield and armor both. I think it was mostly curiosity of me that made her grab me in her claws and fly off to the Coldstones.. Lyckas voice could be heard as we flew away.. "Bring back my Knight". By the time I had a chance to move so I could look down.. Lycka was a dot on the ground. "Alright.. so I'm going to be eaten.. by a dragon.. could be worse, right?" I remember thinking to myself as I peered about the sky, looking for a way to get away.. to what, fall to my death? I might as well enjoy the ride.. and when she lets me down and tries to eat me, fight to the death.
The fight never came.. she dropped me in a pile of snow at the mountain top, dropped down beside me and stared at me a long moment.. then started to bat me around much like a cat would a mouse. She was curious and playful, but she didn't harm me at all. We sat on the top of the mountain, talking.. sort of as she poked at me and looked me over, it was sort of amusing by the time the group got up there.
Here came my rescue party.. swords in hand, ready for a fight.. thinking the dragon was trying to kill me. After I stopped them from attacking Faye, I smiled down at Lycka. She didn't smile back.. instead,what does my Wolf do? She tries to stare down the dragon and there was such fury in her eyes. I wanted to laugh, but I knew I had to stop the staring competition they were having before a fight started. We parted ways a short time later, with no conflict.. watching Faye fly high off into the sky, the sun lighting up her pink scales as she flew.. shining like a pink star in the middle of the day.
Lycka seemed to get over it.. until our next encounter with Faye..
-I- wanted to go looking for Faye.. Lycka was not pleased either, but I felt like Faye could have done much worse to me and I wanted to repay her a bit.. for not eating me. I gathered a bunch of minor magical items, some gold and some gems for her hoard. Kara, Lycka and I as well as a few others head up to the Coldstones, looking for her.. we find her, we talk a bit. At the end.. I remember seeing Lycka even more furious than I've ever seen her.. as Faye tells me. "When I learn to take human form, perhaps I will come to you Pink Knight and learn the ways of human mating". I laughed.. thinking it a joke.. Lycka growled, Kara rolled her eyes and told me that I better be careful, a crush from a dragon.. they can get possessive of the things they want and she may start killing folks to get it.. including Lycka.
We left on peaceful terms that day again, Faye moved her home.. and I didn't see her for years, until the message sent about the dracolich. She appeared at Norwicks gates.. asking for her Pink Knight. As I went out to see her, I was trying to explain why I called her.. she just says.. "I cannot take human form yet, Pink Knight. I cannot mate yet."
I couldn't help but laugh, a childlike innocence.. mixed with the intelligence of a young dragon which is far beyond most adult humans I would think... and the urges of a girl becoming a woman.. what else can a man do but feel a bit flattered that a dragon wants to mate with them when they can take human form?
She didn't know much of the dracolich.. perhaps red and white dragons don't tell their young the same stories.. but, then a shape in the sky, the dracolich was here.. I armed myself, moving slowly at the sight of it, I admit, I was startled by the appearance.. Faye turned to fight it.. but then flew off.. I kept yelling for her to fly. I watched as she took off into the sky, making way as fast as her wings would allow.. she was ahead and getting further ahead.. the dracolich couldn't catch her.. I ran into town to get a Sending scroll, to contact her again. I didn't want her thinking we were trying to lure her here to be harmed. It took awhile for the simple response.. "Bones hurt". She was alive.. and in decent spirits by the sounds of it.. by answering, I can hope she doesn't think I was planning on hurting her.
So Faye will unlikely be back.. Argentius can't help fight the dracolich.. but, it seems the dracolich might be a bit worried with the appearance of so many dragons in such a short time, talking with us humans. Perhaps it's worried we are gaining the strength to beat it.. even though we don't have the dragons fighting with us.. the possibility of the dracolich being worried about just that is an advantage if used properly.
I don't care what everyone says.. I like Faye. She's been kind to me in that.. "She didn't eat me" sort of way. She's been talkative, not hostile other than a few vague threats from a young dragon.. how can I judge her for such? I threaten people at times, as does everyone. Sometimes the occasion calls for it.. but I think she doesn't know how to deal with humans, she uses what she has..
I'm going to give her the chance.. even if others won't.
"Pink Hussy"_