3. BrianJ - Quiet Nameless Hin - small footstepson a long path

BrianJ - Quiet Nameless Hin - small footstepson a long path


  • Written in Common with an elegant hand on a small scroll nestled inside the bookcase in the Four Winds Dojo. The font is neat, but the letters are all bent in ways that sugest that the writer is unused to using this alphabet

    I have recently returned from my travels to the West, where I sought my new name. I had traveled to the shore, and some ways South, but the name that will be mine must have decided that I am not yet worthy of it. I traveled back to the Narfell region much as I had left it.

    Upon my return, I met an old cleric of Lethander who I had a good conversation with. Much of it was spent correcting misconseptions, but one thing I walked away from it with was perhaps a step on my path.

    While much of my training involves the careful examination of self and the release of the Ego, I have found that overall my life lacks Purpose. Young students of my Order quickly realize that the Search for Mastery of Self feeds the Ego, and so move on to other pursuits. For a time, I thought I had found a Purpose in the search for my name. I have come to realize that this is a mistake. The Name can be considered to be a Statment of Purpose in itself, abiet one that is sometimes a statment of a single word. This makes the questing for one somewhat circular in thinking, and is ultimetly as counter-productive as the quest for Mastery itself.

    This means that one cannot seek the name if one hopes it will be found.

    Now that I am aware of my error though, I can perhaps hope to find a solution. Once I discover my purpose in this Realm, I will no doubt prove to my next name that I am worthy of it.

    To that end, I have sought and recieved addmittance into the Four Winds. I shall meditate further on the Purpose that best suits my skills, and no doubt the rest of the pieces will fall into place from there.

    I leave these written footprints in plain text so that others may perhaps benifit from my own trials on the Path.


  • Today I was meditating next to one of the fountains in the Temple of Hope, and a vision came bebore my eyes. I saw in my vision a pond in a forest, surounded by trees on all sides. A deer diped its head to take a drink, and I felt myself pulled down to the water where the deer touched it. Beneath the tranquil surface I found myself, not so much as a ripple to mark my passing. There was life here, fish and other assirted water creatures… None seemed to take any notice of me. I could not say how long I was there, but the life of the pond went on regardless. After a time, I noticed that I was moving again. Down I went, and down some more... Untill all traces of the sun above were gone. Still further down I felt myself moving, time and distance undeterminable. At last I felt myself at the bottom, although I could not feel the mud beneath my feet. Still here there was life too, and still none marked my passing.

    After a time, I found myself moved again, this time far above the trees. I looked down upon the forest and saw the birds, and the trees, and the creatures that walked on the ground. For one moment, I felt I understood it all, although I confess to having lost that one sublime moment. I closed my eyes, and upon opening them again it all had departed from me. The forest, the creatures and the clarity of understanding. I think I will perhaps spend the rest of my life trying to recover that one perfect moment, and I fear it will be in vain.

    I was however left with one thing to remind me of that Perfect Moment. My name has found me, and I will spend the rest of my days seeking that One Moment known to all as Still Water.


  • The plan to build the school is progressing. Many organisations have been contacted and have pledged thier support.

    My most recent experience in attempting to gather further support has reminded me of somethign a wise man once said:

    "Knowledge speaks, but Wisdom listens."

    I do not doubt that this is true, however I doubt that Knowledge has a monopoly on the speaking. A new student should also remeber though, that "A witty saying proves nothing." Find the Tao of the thing in your own mind.

    Recently I encountered a strange sort on the way to Peltarch. After a few questions and much thought, I was still unable to determine her role in this place. She told to me that she was once a monk, but that she had lost the Path. She had a most disorganized mind. We discussed her Tao to some extent, and I commented that she would more easily be able to find her Way if she took steps to order her mind. "What use the map if the landmarks are not constant?" I asked. "That is what the heart is for." was her reply.

    A bit of bad poetry came into my head at that point, and I shall record it here so that future generations do not fail in the protection against such things:

    "Let the compass of the heart lead the way
    When the map of the Mind is in disarray."

    I do hope that I see this individual again, so that we may more fully come to understand her Tao. I have whispering in my mind that she has something important yet to do in this place.


  • Today I intstructed our newest member of the Four Winds on the signifigance of the Tao. He doesn't know his Tao yet, and I can hardly blame him. Having only recently discovered my own, I feel it should take a while for him to find his. I worry for one of our other newer students. She does not take the time to order her thoughts, and so goes and does as the passing breeze tells her to. The Path will not be found by one who does not take the time to seek it. Unless she soon takes the steps needed to instill discipline and reflection into her life, she will lose the path or her life.

    The progress of the new school is slow. There are many people to meet, and they all have thier own agendas. Already though the ripples are starting to be felt. With two new students inducted into the Four Winds this month, the future of the Order is less in question.


  • Today rested from my ordeal after the druid glen. Goblins may not be paticularly fleet, but they are many and loud. Everywhere I turned I found several more waiting for me. After I felt sufficiently recovered to venture out from the Four Winds dojo in Jiyyd, I traveled to Norwick to see what was going on there recently. Aside from some talk of a caraboo of sorts there was little. I traveled with my friend from the Order of the Phoenix to the Gypsy Camp. I had hoped to find out if anything of note had happened there recently, and the friend of mine sought a family member. Alas, there was no one around who could relate any tales, and the Cousin was not to be found either.

    Perhaps soon the new Gypsy King can clear his schedule enogh to grant me an audience. I have come to the conclusion that my own Tao in this Realm is to teach, and I think that my home with the Gypsies is the best place to start. If I obtain the permission I seek, I will have to consult with some building professionals to learn what more I will require. My Order taught me how to make many shelters for protection of the elements, but lasting structures require more expertiese than my own meager skills detail.

    Now that I have found my Tao, can my name be far behind? Time will tell.


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    I met again with the Scout from before, and she introduced me to a Hin that had badly offended the local Druidic Circle in the Rawlins. He sought reconciliation, and following the Scout's sugestion we went to plant trees in the Rawlins to show goodwill.

    Sometime later I had a conversation with the head of the Druids in the Rawlins. She was greatly angered by this Hin who had so carelessly killed some trees in her forest. She fears for the safety of her chosen ward much as a mother fears for her child. We spoke long of this fear, and of actions and the consiquences of them. We spoke of Life, and of Death, and of Tao. I asked her to think on the Tao of her forest, and of the Tao of it's trees. When next we meet we shall see if she has come to a greater understanding of the Tao of the Rawlins, and what internal peace she may come to regarding this. Also we may see what understanding she may forge with those who seek to cause death in the Rawlins.


  • Continued in the same hand

    Today I joined an Elf in the Gypsy Camp to assist in the thinning of the Spider population. The Spiders of the pass have a much simpler rlationship with the Gypsy Camp then the Eastlanders do with Norwick and Peltarch. It boils down to a case of Preditor/Prey. They are a threat that cannot be negotiated away. The only way to reduce thier threat is with death, by one party or another. There is no need for remorse when dealing such with them, for by killing you they satisfy a primal need, that of hunger. Thier Purpose in this life is merely to live, by whatever means are nessissary. There is more to the relationship though than kill or be killed however. Baba Katya of the Gypsy camp uses what those brave enough to face the Spiders bring her to prepare curitive agents. The Spiders may prey on the wildlife of the pass where they live, but with their own deaths bring about assorted kits and tonics that are used by many who visit with the Gypsies. Were the Spiders ever eradicated completly, it would doubtlessly have a negative impact on the quality of life that the sale of such agents provide the residents of the Camp.

    Some time later, I was speaking with a fellow Hin, who claims that her own Purpose in this life is to be a Scout, and a Defender. I do not feel I fully understand her. To me, doing what she does is a means without an end. Seemingly her goal is the task itself, which does not make much sense. While I have learned that for One's Purpose being the Search for Purpose is irrational, so it seems that having One's Purpose being one's Purpose is also irrational. And yet it seems Right and Reasonable to this Scout I met. I will have to meditate on this more, to see if the points raised in the descussion can be used towards a resolution of my own delemas.