3. "Finding a Balance of sorts" - A journal of Leena

"Finding a Balance of sorts" - A journal of Leena


  • _Szath Durro!

    The greenish cast of his skin and his lisp would seem comical if he didn't also tend to have the flat, dead eyes of a reptile when you're speaking to him, where you can see your face reflected back at your with his mocking expression plastered on.

    That's the Malarite who wishes to join the circle, or at least parley with us, probably to escape the wrath of his own former clanmates for wanting out of the way of Rasuil's path of destruction.

    I don't know what his true motivations are, but he's not doing himself any favors being a snarky ass. He seems so OBVIOUSLY up to something, yet here we are, trusting him to come peacefully to a meeting, and expecting to have to believe things he says.

    I'm not sure what to do, or how this is going to go, but we've got to see it play out, one way or another.

    After that … well, the Aurilites need our help with a lich it seems, we need to boot the demons off of the portals in the rawlins and close those up, I need a Helmite Champion to wear the relic I have on my person, and re-open the temple of helm in Jiyyd (more demons, yay), and finally hope to close the rift between planes that's threatening to turn Narfell into a hellscape.

    Nothing that can't be solved by dinner, right?

    At least Anna helped me out today, going Gnoll hunting. I'm finally not flat broke now, and got to have a Dire Tiger run. Now to go check on Doona. Damn riverboat guy wouldn't let two of us ride on a ticket. Time to run!_


  • _Labur and Gnarl make good traveling partners. A trip to the ettins with barely a scratch helps clear the mind for things to come.

    I need to remember the name of the Malarite 'envoy' who wants to speak with the circle. I need to make sure that Doona the Scale isn't harmed unnecessarily. I need to end Korvan, free Silvia the fey, and fish Rasuil out of a darkness that I don't actually know the true depths of, though he's told me much.

    My mind was full of these things as we traversed the caves, and the dangers therein, and it all felt … routine. Simple. No screaming demons. No howling Malarites. Just ... fighting, mining, chatting away, and of course, ales. Dwarves are good company all around.

    Speaking of company ... things are getting strained. Hin protecting hin, I get, but this new one, Sil, seems to have some things to learn. The line between ally and enemy has been wickedly hard to discern lately. I understand Rasuil's vendetta, and mine would be just as bloody had it been Artemis that was treated as Rasuil's mate was. Maybe worse, with the power I've managed to wrangle in these past few years.

    Isolde is more than worried about the darkness in Ras, and I think that Ros has been figuring out just how to take him out, should the necessity arise.

    I won't let that happen.

    When he was turned into a beast, we all worked together, and brought him back ... but watching the form take shape, the muscles and hate literally turning his body into a were-creature of shadow and hate ... you have to wonder how much of that was already inside him.

    My imagination and knowledge team up, sometimes ... and I hardly -have- to wonder.

    I have to do something, and soon. I'll arrange this meet at the Druid glen, sort out what can be sorted as best I can ... and we'll fight the rest. I just ... I wish father were here. Somehow his hard-hdeadedness prevailed when it should not, people putting trust in him to make things right, and it usually worked out. He was a leader with ranks, positions, trust. I don't know -why- people trust me as they do, but I have to use my own skills, and not try to be him.

    Dad, I hope you're watching. Things may very well go to shit faster than I can shovel. I guess in the meantime, while I wait, I'll say another prayer for Ronan, and hope he can hear me. I need guidance. A Druid is seldom lost, but try telling my mind that. Especially when I'm trying to sleep. Perhaps ... perhaps it's time I visited Irmunsil.

    Perhaps past time._


  • _A long time ago, or so it seems to me, I began to take up my father's mantle as a Druid of the Rawlins. That, by default, meant that I was an adventurer. My sister and I both trained since we were young to take up arms as our parents did, though that's not to say our life was without comforts, and love, and the playfulness that comes with being a child.

    No, my childhood was great. I had a wonderful little family, and a just as wonderful extended family. Ael and Lycka were like an aunt and uncle, and our parents would take turns watching one another's kids here and there. It was pretty great!

    Back when I first set out, Mom gave me a sword. It was made of platinum, and it saw a LOT of battle, early on. It was the sword in my hand when I helped liberate the trapped souls in the elf camp, and a blessing from one such spirit still inhabits that blade. I don't use it much any longer, since I finally acquired a well made scimitar that fits better with the training that my father gave me.

    Dad provided the bow, and it was etched with lightning bolts all up and down it. I was told early on, and can sense even now, that it has a secret, that maybe in time it's true power would be unlocked! I've strived to unlock that secret, and figured that perhaps gaining favor with Talos was the way to do that. Clever Dad found an easy way to make sure that I gave the furies their due, that's for certain.

    I've slain more foes with lightning than I have any other magic, and that bow has reached out to would, harass, and slay many foes at even the farthest distances. Battlefields that would have taken days to clean up, I have lugged the bodies into a pile, and called upon the stormlord, dedicating my part in that battle to him, offering up a sacrifice of the destruction we wreaked upon our enemies. Many times, was he pleased, and he took them in a flash of light, leaving behind nothing but ash, and some spots in many people's vision.

    Still, the answer never came.

    I've heard that good things come to those who wait, so I was patient. For years, I have been patient. I've spoken to Talos in dreams, I've called for his aid in hunting down enemies. His power and that of Akadi, through Aoth, even helped blast a fallen angel out of the sky as he fled us.

    Still, no answers. No change. Nothing.

    Good things may come to some of those who wait, but I am clearly meant to chase after what I seek, so I did. I decided one day, to simply go to the small grove near Peltarch, and scry upon my bow, to see if there's something hidden I simply needed to look for. Another part of it, perhaps, or some clue as to it's origin. I asked, and scried, and an answer came, though it was not what I sought at that moment.

    The storm raged, centered on me, while my companions stood by and watched. The lightning flashed all around me, but as usual, I was not harmed … until I was. The lightning struck me, making my body rigid, and threatening to break my concentration.

    I held.

    The land around me darkened, the winds picked up more, the lightning was making the land brighter than day, and darker than a dreamless sleep, rapidly switching between the two states in a way I've never seen. I kept my composure, stared ahead of me where something seemed to be forming, and it struck again. It nearly took me from my kneeling position, and I felt my own flesh start to crack, seared. The pain was terrible ...

    Still I held.

    Once more this happened, another blast, just after a slight pause, as if the storm itself waited for me to abandon my fool's errand.

    I did not, and I paid for it. I paid in blood, and pain, the destruction of my flesh, and the attempted shattering of my will.

    I was undeterred. One does not face down a test from their Gods, and flinch! Granted, it almost killed me, and I think at that point an errant breeze might have, but I held, and then the storm abated, parting like curtains, to reveal an image to us. An image that spoke to me.

    Liberate me!

    It was Silvia, and she was in a tree … her own tree, I would learn, in the place she named the Deepwood Court.

    We were right, she IS held, by Malarites, enemies of the Wolves of Narfell and Rasuil in particular. And now, I know where she is. It took a meeting with Horgrim to figure out where it is, and -that-, was hard fought information. We spoke at great length, and it rose to straight up arguing, me staring up at an ogre with glowing green eyes, claws, and fangs, all but shaking my finger at him ... that would have been rude ... until finally he looked at me, sighed, and said,

    "Your words ring with the bells of reason, Druidess, and the debt of obligation is already in your favor."

    And here I was, ready to face some serious consequence for arguing with Horgrim Blackweave himself, in the Bardic college's own hall, surrounded by fancy teacakes and roast chicken. Boy would that have been an embarrassing end.

    Armed with what information I have, and making plans to lure the Malarites out and take them all down with Rasuil and whoever else will help ... my search for my bow's secrets can wait.I have some hunting to do._


  • _War.

    It's one of those things that's more simple, yet more complex, than most people ever give it credit for.

    There's the simplicity of the "Us vs. them" mentality, but it's seldom that simple. Each sides thinks it's in the right, deserving of the win, whatever that entails. Sometimes the soldiers in the wars are willing, sometimes not, and often, I don't feel like they're fully informed of -what- they're fighting for.

    We, the faithful in Isolde's plan, made it to Regal's Fjord, to end one such war, with unwilling participants led by a madman. Talbot Anderson, he could have been so much more, but instead was a man seeking power, who found it, and subjected soldiers to a transformation of gears and magic and subjection of their will.

    He argued that they were the rejects of Peltarch, nobodies and criminals and scum, that he could put them to a more noble use, a calling! HE would protect Peltarch from all threats, foreign and within alike!

    Frankly, the man became a monster, with "good" intentions and the most horrid execution you've ever seen. Frankly, I wanted to ram my sword down his throat mid-speech…

    Anyway, we fought in Regal's Fjord, and it was a total clusterfuck. We underestimated how the force would take over the gates and walls, and with a single catapult launch, they were in.

    Defend Isolde!

    Brave Isolde started her song, began the magics that would turn the soldiers back to our side, back to their own minds, would take away Talbot's army that he so badly wanted to expand. I'm sad that I've killed so many of these men ... dockworkers turned soldiers turned puppets, but Isolde saved more of them, and we backed her up while she sang the songs, even dispelled the wild magics that sprung up around and lashed out at us, all keeping her singing.

    The fight culminated as the soldiers brought in a tremendous creche forge piece, setting it up to take over the town and spread the influence of the machine-hive throughout the town and take over everything and everyone in it, like in the mountains.

    NOT THIS TIME!

    I set loose a swarm of biting insects, summoned them from under the earth itself, and they began dismantling anything they could get jaws on, flesh and wires alike, while spell and bow, acid fog and tangling vines, all joined in on that spot. We unleashed out own version of hell on the prime upon that spot, and everything within fell before the onslaught. The final assault upon our high ground failed, too, but it was hard fought. Bodies were strewn about like an angry child threw his dolls hither and yon, but none of our group were among them.

    "Victory," such as it was, had been short lived. I dashed into town, and set upon the townsfolk, trying to save those who could be saved. In all, I saved about 30 people who would have simply died from bleeding out, other injuries, or infection, without being tended to when I got there.

    I spent all of my magic, and a great many healing items, but it was worth it. They fought with us, and many died. Died from a surprise attack that we could have provided more soldiers to fight against, but we wanted that surprise on our side.

    Could it have gone differently? Did we end up like Nauran and Halbrook, and disregard civilian casualties so easily? He was ready to kill Pliskin to get Tusker ... poor misinformed Tusker. He deserved the hail of arrows he got, and poor Pliskin would have died, had I not known that he was poisoned, as we healed him.

    What. A. Mess.

    Decisions made the fight what it was. Isolde and Arty destroyed a huge part of the creche-forge, all of it's spreading tendrils wrecked, and only the core remaining, where we found him, Sally Williams dying in his hands, before he tossed her aside too, like a discarded toy. We had a decision... we could face him there, or rush to save Sally, first.

    As much as I wanted to take him in an unstable terrain, to throw him off balance, we -had- to save Sally ... so we did, and I CRUMBLED the wall that sprang up to block him from us, and we rushed after.

    I could go on about the specifics of the fight ... but I'll leave it at, "It was Ugly." Talbot picked individual targets at a time. I had to turn into a troll briefly to be able to resist some of the beatdown he directed at me when I was trapped by a creche-claw.

    I filled that bastard with so many arrows , trying to find weak points in that tremendous armor he wore, pulling my poor bow back as far as it would go with each rapid shot after another after another.

    We got him, and he fell, spitting blood and trying to rise, trying to speak, and cursing us for fools. That we had doomed Peltarch, that HE was the hero, and those people were -nothing- before him, and we had no idea what we'd done ...

    Ros droned on behind him going "Blah blah blah" in imitation, and I calmly stepped over to his kneeled form, raising my sword high. I looked to the others, and saw grim reflections of my own desire. Nods and the words "Do it" ensured that I wasn't about to get spelled or tackled for my trouble ...

    One thrust, and silence replaced the stream of hate and abuse pouring forth from the mouth of the traitor, for the last time. I took his life, and we moved on, stripping the gear from the corpse, which I then burned, for good measure. Just in case.

    Rey took his head, we stripped his gear, and Isolde went to finish Godfrey and Godfreya's work, setting them free, and getting that creche-forge out of Narfell, with a plane-shift and us being teleported back to Peltarch.

    I'm ... a lot of things, right now.

    Elated, fatigued, relieved, and worried. Did he really know of a threat that we don't? Would we have been glad for his half-machine army?

    I suppose we'll find out, but for now, I have a larger, more personal concern. I'll write of it next, once I settle down for a nap in my own little grove in front of my home.

    I really should grow a line of bramble in front of it, with a careful path through, to discourage intruders that don't belong..._


  • A sketch of a demon follows, with a little tally near the picture, and a sub-note.

    Three of these assholes down. How many more, or will the next one finally get me?


  • _As usual, I'm the worst at this.

    I keep meaning to write, to keep track of my experiences, to be good at this kind of thing, but I'm just not! I'm a woman of action, unless that action is writing … and then I appear to be a lazyass!

    At any rate, things are heated to a boil these days, and I'm smack in the middle, or just to the side, of all of it.

    The Abyssal rift in Jiyyd has grown past the bounds of the barrier that the Druids made, and it's letting energies and demons out at an alarming rate. They're apparently trying to take over the various Menhirs in Narfell to help fuel the planar collission, or something more nefarious, and we've been fighting them off as best we can.

    We need to assault the greater portal by the stone ring, near the scar, past where the hobgoblins are, as the very AIR there is so thick with heat and sulfur that it burns you just to be there. The rift is strong there, and greater demons are present and waiting, and working.

    The plan, as I know it, is that we need to weaken that force, and then separate the planes by erecting a new barrier, but around the temple of helm there, specifically, that will reactivate it as a dimensional anchor, and scoot the planes back apart that way. To get in though ... we need a helmite chosen, and an artifact from Helm as well ... and thanks to Akton Sent, we have one.

    Snydders sent a group of us right into Akton Sent's fortress. He was apparently a rebel leader from the Peltarch Civil war of many years ago, and a powerful foe. We fought off many of his men, then the man himself, and nearly got killed for our troubles ... but we freed the Green Knights he held captive, recovered the Helmite artifact, and closed a chapter of Peltarch's history in one fell swoop. Akton Sent is dead, and both High Priest Galin, and General Del'Rosa themselves seemed floored that we did that.

    I might have started making a name for myself, here. I even started training the elf that joined us, Theron, as my apprentice. Hellsakes, I even went ahead and got myself a Peltarch citizenship while I'm at it.

    I now ... more than ever ... am probably a shit magnet of epic proportions. The Hellfire Amulet I have in a warded bag upon my person, is going to attract demonic attention every time I put it on, or worse, all the time, if my wards aren't good enough, and NOW I also have an artifact of Helm on my person that I need to find the right person to give to. Until then, however, it's on me to make sure it's safe, and use it if needed.

    The cherry on top? Poor uncle Ras is back in a nasty bit of business too ... as the pack of Malarites that killed his mate has returned, and are seeking blood, trouble, and perhaps vengeance for the huge number of them that Ras and my father killed. Looks like I'll get the chance to take a few more steps in Dad's boots, yet!

    On a most personal note ... I had some armor made with the help of Z, and Fiona the Aurilite Druidess, guardian of the sacred minerals island, and it's helped me a lot. It even ate a lightning spell that was coming for me in the gnoll woods. I feel like I'm finally unlocking the secrets that an elder Druid should know ... and I feel like I'm SO close to figuring out what secrets Talos himself has in the bow that I've carried since my first steps as an adventurer.

    I've given glory to him in battle, dedicated my fight to his storms and power, and sacrificed the bodies of many fallen to the hunger of his lightning, watching them be vaporized to ash for the glory of the Stormlord. I know someday I'll find out this bow's destiny, and I thought I had it recently, but again, was left with only questions.

    I'll continue to do as I do, fight and bleed and scream through my battles. Mielikki will guide my blade, Talos's storms will bathe me in light and blood, and I'll find my answers yet.

    For now ... I guess I should return my attention to Theaon and Isolde. We're talking about the demon-threat again, and I have much to say!_


  • _When last I wrote, I was raised by the lady herself, and thought that maybe I should be doing something bigger. Chasing an actual purpose. I think that path was just made more clear.

    Back in Dad's day, a weapon was used in the N'Jast war. A weapon that struck hard, and deep, apparently right in a spot where the planes themselves were close to one another, where tears could happen. Tears to the abyss, specifically.

    Jiyyd became a demon infested wasteland, and is now even more so, as the rift is widening past the constraints of the old barrier that Dad helped the old circle set up. Speaking of them… several are now dead, too. Apparently they decided on a whim to take a chance at erecting a new barrier, leaving several dead. Rainhammer, Thunderstepper, and I think Bonegnasher. All dead, and some of their bodies even gone. Taken.

    The circle is weak, now. Fractured. Due to the fact that some of the surviving Elders left to their old tribes, some are dead, and some are still recovering, we lack leadership. We lack membership TO lead. Fadia brought this up to Ronan, there was some brief discussion, and now I'm an Elder. Do I get a badass Elder name too? Dad's was Silverfang, there's Rainhammer and Thunderstepper and Shapeshifter... what will I be, I wonder?

    Frivolous musing helps distract from the fear, right now, and even as I write this now, I should still have the taste of victory on my lips.

    We killed Gorbok, Goblin King of the Rawlins. His former compatriot, Dafna, arranged his "Death by Adventurer." She thought she was playing us, but Rasuil and I planned to ice her when she came to collect her crown. We almost succeeded, too. Rasuil, archer of legend... missed.

    We teleported away, with shouts of defiance and in Isolde's case, annoyance at not knowing the plan, divvied up loot, and left Ras enjoying the crown on his head.

    I knew war with Dafna was coming, but our missing our shot seriously sped things up, I bet. I might need to ward my treehouse now, or move it with Liveoak, the spell.

    ...

    I speak of such magic so casually now... when Dad being able to cast that was stretching his power, and he needed help. I believe that i may have surpassed him in almost every way now, save for his swordsmanship. If i can get Mom's sword reforged as a scimitar... perhaps i can make use of dad's training all those years ago.

    At any rate, i need to visit that shop in Oscura again. These herbs save my bacon against those dispel happy shrouds. I'll probably write again once I'm bathed in the glow of cave mushrooms, surrounded by familiar faces that don't bother me, and the hushed sounds of a quiet cave city._


  • _Dear journal, diary, or whoever is reading this. Whatever or whoever I'm writing to, I apologize for not having written lately. There's simply been too much going on, and in my few moments of solitude, even writing feels like I'm not alone, when I need to be.

    You know, to collect my thoughts. Be quiet and peaceful. Not because I need to get away from anyone in particular or anything, that's just silly.

    I'm writing now, because of death. And undeath.

    For me, there's almost nothing scarier than seeing one of my friends die. I've done it once, and that felt like enough for me … and I'd SAY I did it twice ... but it didn't quite take.

    What got me thinking about it was a jaunt into the Peltarch Crypts thanks to the sanitation worker tipping us off that something was up. We got to a door where the noise was coming from, and found some adventuring types including Mint ... who immediately scarpered, and left her other companions behind. One of whom was dragged back into the doorway by ... something.

    We went in, me, Ros, and Artemis, to find a few disturbed sarcophagi, some dead Duergar, and Whisper with the two other adventurers whose name I can't remember. One decided to call me "Woman" and be a general jackass for most of the trip.

    I don't care for him one bit.

    Long story short, angry ghost cursed us, something sketchy seemed to be going on, we fought a mummy lord (Immediately turned to stone by the caster guy), a powerful ghost, a lesser skeleton, and a greater skeleton of some sort. I was able to hold my own against each, but the swordsman of the sketchy adventurer due left behind by Mint and joined by whisper, was cut down.

    Hard.

    I couldn't even stop to TRY to help him, as right after we took down the skel, the ghost had to be re-killed.

    And then, he groaned. The dead guy got up, and tried to get away from us ... and since it didn't look like he was raised by the Gods... any that I know of anyway ... I checked on him with a heal spell.

    It didn't work.

    He was undead.

    He reacted super badly to my attempts to test his affliction further, and attacked me, so I kicked his ass. There was much argument about this from his pal, but I didn't know the cause of him being brought back like that, so I put him down, tied him up ... and while we were talking, Ros died.

    On the spot.

    Cough cough... death style.

    Arty teleported us to a temple and safety, where we were de-cursed ... but after she cast a spell on the now undead Ros and that guy (Yes, she came back the same way), she made me kill them both. In the middle of a temple. With my own sword.

    Killing Ros sucked.

    At any rate, we're all fine now, but it reminded me. We fought Gesundheit again a few weeks prior, and ... well, he wasn't there actually, we fought one of the sources of his power. A Djinni. He could have, of course, beat our asses handily, but he fought us by summoning dispel happy minions instead, who were also very handy with ice storms.

    In moments ... Ros and Artemis were dead. I only lasted a moment longer, before I too, fell.

    I felt the blackness settle over me, heard my heartbeat no more, closed my eyes ... and then opened them again with a gasp and no small amount of surprise.

    Mielikki had picked me up, put me back on my feet, and turned me loose. And I fought. I cast every spell I knew, taking special pleasure in invoking Talos to strike down a whole handful of his pals at once. The noise was deafening. There I was, after he had decided that he would fight us after all, but his physical form versus ours, none of this magic, and I was out of spells. Out of tricks. Turning into a dire tiger helped take him down, so we won! Except, he was kind of a dick, and our options sucked.

    Long story short, we tricked him into bringing our friends back by threatening to use our "Wish" for beating him to make him undo himself ... and he's presumably off to kick Gesundheit's ass now.

    Hopefully.

    That feeling though, of coming back? It makes me feel like there's something bigger I'm needed for, than what I'm doing now.

    It's time to get to work._


  • _Well, the skulking about in Oscura didn't turn up much… Except the best damned restaurant menu in all of Narfell!! I have a full food pack again, and this time it's not all bats, rats, and carameled mice! Mmmmm, Rothe.

    The glen has been mostly quiet, save for my own comings and goings, with even Ronan being in and out and busy. I'm hoping he's able to make some time to talk, soon. I didn't get to discuss all the details with him, yet!

    Fadia made an appearance, too. When showing Nate the glen, she arrived, and storytime began, where I learned something interesting. Our stone... Was shaped by Fadia herself! Talk about feeling overshadowed. I think...I need to create something. Leave behind a legacy.

    I think I have just the plan for it, too._


  • _Much has happened since last I wrote, though a dozen times, I tried to write again.

    To summarize, so I do not forget … and these are far from in the right order;

    Viola Bravickus almost met a splattery fate thanks to Gustaav Dae and his violin, which nearly made her step from the college's rooftop

    We fought an avatar of some lich fellow after finding something he didn't want us to find

    We watched half of the force of Peltarch's Defenders get taken over by strange circuitry and living wires, and are currently hunting for Talbot

    I led an expedition out from the glen, to a small island with a Druidess named Fiona, who Ronan Addams was concerned for. We saved the island, but didn't manage to save the magical trees from harm ... and it turns out the attack was masterminded by a gnome named Gesundheit. He's a twat. I also saw my first rust monster. It ate Nathen's sword.

    He's almost getting less whiny?

    Met with a dwarf who experiments on undead, rather than creating them. We made a bargain for some kind of weapon to help me fight the undead, hopefully.

    I spent ... a lot of time with Artemis. And it's exactly what I want. I have a good feeling about this. That being said, why do I still feel so hesitant and scared?

    I got a set of Vanoogle's pipes!

    Isolde wrote books about the Beeble mysteries and subsequent rescue mission.

    Oh, it looks like Ros is up! I think we're going to go skulk about some, now ... Yay!_


  • _Sometimes, the most tame adventure can take the strangest of turns. Like today, when we were exploring the sandy caves below the lizard man lair.

    We decided to go through there and see about obtaining some diamond powder for my stone skin spell, despite feeling kind of bad about it, with Kaitlyn talking about some truce her Father orchestrated looking ago. She also won't go picking fights with sentient creatures. While I feel that's noble, I can't be her.

    I'm guessing the truce also failed long before my time, as I've been at the Peltarch wall and helped repel attacks from the lizard men.

    At any rate, we fought our way through, only to find ourselves stuck in a dead magic zone.

    It's… Unlike anything I've ever felt. It's a terrible feeling, and it turns out that there's a special tree that can do this, called a Sussir tree. After fighting off animated statues, and freaking Basilisks!!! , We came across the tree. Dire warnings about forbidden knowledge, magical traps that had to be disabled with magic IN a wild magic zone... It turns out the tree was likely translated from the underdark to combat those effects.

    We struggled our way past trap and enemy, spell and sinkhole, to come across two sarcophagi and a phylactery, after getting to raid a treasure room of sorts. There was an argument about going out trying to defeat a menace before it ever had a chance to show itself, but we were spell spent and weary, and may not have been able to take down the foe.

    We moved on with our prizes, some of which I will not write down since they're personal or need no mention, and I managed to snag not only some Sussir wood, but a gem that is also spell resistant. I'm very excited to go searching for some other things to try to make new armor out of.

    I mean, I've come to terms with the fact that I'm going to have to be up front. I may as well make the most of it!_


  • _There's something to be said for having a shield. If you have a shield, you can fight from behind it. It can save you from taking blows that might otherwise hit home, or outright strike you down. It can deflect pressure from you, allowing you to slip to the side and deal some damage. It can even absorb the brunt of an impact, and take damage itself, instead of you.

    Now I know what these inanimate objects, and people who get used as one, feel like. Before I continue, reader, whoever you may be, don't get me wrong. I willingly haul myself to the front of a line when I need to. The bow collects dust in my pack after that, since it's hard to skip forward to fill a role where you're needed, and then fall right back as if you won't be needed up there again, despite having needed to go up there in the first place. I even volunteer to go on adventures with folks whose strengths are -not- being frontline fighters. Like, for this example, Roslyn and Ginger.

    We decided, after much deliberation on where to go and adventure, to head off to the orcs, and bother them. We cleared out the cave to the Northwest, first, before heading further west, to go up the mountains, past the wolves, into the caves, and to grandmother's house we go. The first cave was simple. I hoarded my magic, and simply took my sister's coral and driftwood hammer to them instead, mashing them left and right. This thing … is perfect. I've felled a gnoll in a single hit!

    Those weaker orcs died even more easily. It was amazing. Though of course, it was only a precursor to the real challenge, which was, of course, heading up the mountain further. Winter Wolves proved less of a threat than one would expect, since we were all prepared for cold, and the hammer-orcs, which I used to fear greatly, fell with no spectacular effort. With two able scouts, I knew what situations I was walking into before I showed my face, and surprise barely had time to register on my enemy's faces before their faces still for the last time.

    We searched for prisoners, we scoured for treasures, we hunted for signs of anything amiss, and we fought. And by we fought ... at this point what I really mean is "I swung at things to get them to overreach and try to hit me, then Ros and Ginger turned them into sad bloody porcupines. I hope I never piss the two of them off.

    We killed hundreds of orcs, just us three. The two hin joked about training a whole army of archers in their tactics. The thought makes me shudder. Imagine a whole field creeping along, concealed in tall grass, their forms would just look like the grass moving, being so small, before a thousand arrows you never saw coming, came streaking your way.

    They're the perfect shadows to me. I have an orange glow about me these days from Alvaniel's ring, for which I owe her an enchantment, and I wear my father's old armor, long forgotten in an unused chest, still dyed in the blak and blue of the legion when I found it. It's green and brown now, and I take no efforts to hide. I have my displacerbeast armor for that, after all ...

    We crushed our opposition on the way there, and had some trouble on the way back, but made it through nonetheless, and afterward ... I felt ... more capable. More powerful. Like I learned an important lesson, something about who I am.

    I feel strong, and I think the Gods have blessed me yet again. I need to go try it out, but I think I've gained some knowledge the last time I slept.

    My dream was that I was outnumbered by gnolls, cackling demon gnolls, like that recent mining trip I organized for Gnarl, and they had me backed into a small valley, and as a last ditch effort, I wished for a storm to take them with me ... and fire rained down, burning all but me.

    I awoke feeling strong, not scared. I'm more alive than I've ever been. I feel, however ... that my role is gradually changing. I'm needed up front more, me and Fayt both, despite my preference for bow and spell. I think I'm going to need to do some research, and see if anybody has ever made Ironwood Fullplate ..._


  • _Gods above, what a day.

    I've avoided writing about the Beeble situation just yet, mostly to try to keep it out of my mind so I don't accidentally go venturing into the dreamscape while I sleep, and end up there again. Especially not alone…

    From confronting a nightmare about Dad leaving to get away from me, and other silliness, to watching my friends fight far more real names with their own particular apparitions, the horrid nightmare creatures we had to fight seem almost tame by comparison.

    Almost.

    Through it all, there was something comforting. Everything Dad taught me, everything in his journals, it all helped. I got to exercise the number one rule of fighting as a Druid. Druids Cheat.

    I bent the dreamscape we were in around us, and guided us through where I could, and fought like hell every time we found battle... And until the very end, it did not seem like enough. Especially when we watched what had happened to Beeble... Poor Beeble.

    I tried to change it. I really did. I felt something move, give... Just a little! I screamed myself hoarse, and tried to bend my way through not just a dream, but a memory... And my very -mind- still hurts from it. I would say it was for nothing, as we returned without him, but I think that in another world, another space beside ours, he's OK.

    I really hope that somewhere, he's OK...

    Now to write about the last day or so..._


  • _I'm torn up, and don't know what to do.

    On one hand, I'm going to go revisit an enemy who thinks I'm it's friend, to try to free someone I don't know from it's clutches, after diving directly into it's nigh inescapable prison, with the help of a NECROMANCER, who I ALSO don't know, on the words of a bard I barely know, a sneak whom I know a bit, and a Dryad that I've had two or three entire conversations with.

    I've got no stake in this fight, personally.

    I've got no winning card up my sleeve.

    I've got every reason NOT to go, due to the nature of who is involved, and having a pretty good idea of what we're going up against, some kind of mutated, tampered with, well fed dream vestige with some, dare I say it, vestige of a personality.

    I KNOW better.

    I'm under prepared… I haven't enchanted my armor, my sword, though useful against a fleshy target of hobgoblin strength of less, probably won't do me much good against these undead and dream-fey we're likely to face, and there's hardly an arrow in the world that'll help me either, given that my fireball ones will also hurt my allies.

    Tactics wise, I know my greatest strength is my ability to walk in dreams as if they are the real world, and augment my own reality , and that of those near me, but this thing LIVES (If you can call it that) in the dream plane. How the fark are we actually planning on competing with this?

    It makes sense now, and I feel bad for being dismissive of Isolde and Nate. I think I understand their pixie parade thing now. They're going to try to happy the creature to death or distraction ... I fear.

    If that's their plan, with the goofy outfits, and the sparkly glitter wands, then I'll play along, and I'll be silly and goofy and happy, and rescue this Aesso the Amazing for her pals the tree-lady and the ogre farking necromancer ... but I'll do it like Ros says. Shake their hand with my right, and have a Rock in my left. Except my Rock is going to be dispelling magic and lightning and fire and wrath.

    Oh ... and I'm bringing a surprise, too.

    If my sword won't bite ... I'll bring something that will.

    If you're reading this because you found my corpse, in this world or that of dreams, tell my sister that I'm sorry for not getting to help raise Asha, and that I'll see her and Mom and Dad again somehow, some way, even if I have to do it through dreams.

    Time to go scrounge up as many cheating supplies as I can. Goodbyes suck, so I'm aiming for the win, here.

    I just wish I could trust that everyone's head is in this as much as their hearts... But!

    On the other hand... It's cage is weakening. If we don't close it, untold numbers of people could suffer, or be devoured themselves. That being said, I guess I do have stake in this fight. I consider myself a "good guy", but if a Priest or Paladin were to label me, I might fall more in the middle by their scale.

    Still.

    I can't let this go. I can't just let it happen without doing what I can about it. If nothing else, I have the excuse that this, too, is a matter of the Balance. Between the realm of dreams, and the realm of the woken Prime.

    Shit...I wonder what kind of state Avalon is in...._


  • _I need to be better about taking notes.

    So much has happened, and I've spent more time and gold running about getting into trouble than I have sitting down and collecting my thoughts. And trouble has been my middle name!

    I met a fellow whom I suspect was the former knight that's being looked for, just by his sort of noble but soldiery demeanor, and willingness to help an outnumbered stranger… But speaking of others...

    There are a few distinct forms of flattery that I'm susceptible to. One of which is respect for me as one would respect a truly dangerous foe. I'm honestly not that scary. Sure i can cast a while lot of lightning if I'm prepared for it, or set you on fire, and watch you burn while it lasts a seemingly impossible amount of time... And that's not even considering the wrapping vines, choking clouds of air, the ground greasing and becoming treacherous, all while I dance about in it unharmed. . . I mean sure, that can seem scary, but then you go out on a Bugbear hunt with my sister...

    Bugbears turn on one another, then get destroyed from within and without, quickly and without mercy, at a furious pace that would have left me breathless from the sheer exertion... Had it not happened in a matter of moments.

    But hey, catching up with her was nice, and better yet, she's proud of me. I'm smiling just thinking about it. Her baby girl Asha is apparently doing well, as are her and Jonni in the Witch and Seer. I'm proud of her right back, frankly. Despite Dad's shaky example of partnerships early in his life, at least one of us seems to have gotten it right.

    As for me... Well apparently I talk about Artemis a lot apparently. She asked if I was in love with him, and I remember sputtering something before telling her the truth. I don't know! It's not a "no," but I don't know what it is yet. Time will tell.

    After getting jumped by two vamps that I could hardly hurt, I've slightly adjusted my spell-plan, so hopefully next time will go better. . .

    Now then. The thoughts. Apparently, the Bloodspiders are in open war with the vampires. The self proclaimed Duke of The Docks vampire said that the Bloodspiders are no longer welcome there, under penalty of death. A shadowy character that I believe from various notes and stories to be the once-believed-dead Vloss Orbb, is called Master by said Bloodspiders, and has declared war on the vampires as well. Leena Barackivus (did I spell that right?) It's a Bloodspider Captain apparently, and I got her arrested, causing her sister to try to bargain with me... This is the flattery part I mentioned earlier...

    She brought like, a dozen guards with her in case i didn't want to play nice. A DOZEN! She was infuriatingly polite and clever, and I think I'm another world we might have been friends... I'm just-waiting- for the invitation for tea. Hah!

    She had a request that I work to get her sister released, and a truce between ME and the Bloodspiders. Not Us. Just Me. I knew arresting that broad was going to get me into trouble... Now somebody else thinks I'm a threat all by myself, and if I don't play nice, it's probably assassination attempt time yet again.

    Sis says to tell anybody farking with me that they'll have to deal with her... But she's at home taking care of the baby, and I won't do anything to bring danger her way. Not for anything in the world. She may be worlds stronger than me, but I'm going to cheat my ass off, and surprise all these bastards, vampires and Bloodspiders, and Beebles alike!

    Now if only I felt as brave I look on this page..._


  • _Sometimes, I re-read what I've written, and some things just seem to click into place, like a sword into its original scabbard. When I was about to put will to quill here this time, I was reminded of rights.

    I spent the better part of the day nestled under the arm of Artemis in the Commons of Peltarch. I had evidently dozed off, and when I came to, Artemis was just strollng in. I hesitated, about to cast my usual spells, as it had bitten me in the ass last time… And he's there anyway. It someone comes after me out of nowhere, they're going to catch ball lightning up the ass while I have a moment to get ready.

    It was... Nice.

    Part of me wonders...

    Bah, anyway. We went to the sewers a few days ago after seeing some Bloodspider gang types heading down there, Artemis, Ros, Isolde, Alvaniel and I, maybe someone else? Gnarl? We went down there to investigate, and ended up happening across an arcanist who had apparently made a vampire detection glyph to protect her higher ups meeting.

    From what I've learned since, thanks to Magistrate Shannon, we apparently saw the infamous Vloss Orbb himself, before we ended up capturing a women with a nice name, but a bad attitude. Leena Barackivus, apparent noble of house Barackivus, and apparent heir in her father's footsteps too, the late senator Barackivus. If I have it correct, Vloss is supposed to be dead, from a Grag Axe to the head, and the senator died in a cell from poisoning.

    My do we ever lived in interesting times. Then, just as things send calm much later, a mercenary band called the Crimson Spikes showed up, looking for a former Purple Dragon Knight who aided in the escape of a young noble woman, and are thought to be in or near Peltarch. I'm not sure if they should be found and turned over, or if this is another case of classic Narfellian politics where innocents are questionable enough to begin with, and justice is cloudy at best.

    Time will tell.

    As for time, as I was leaving, Artemis asked if I wanted him to walk me to wherever I was going. I thought a moment, and aaskedhim if -he- wanted to walk me anywhere, and even he made noises about enjoying my company, he couldn't quite tell me that he actually wanted to. I stated the difference for him, hugged him, and left in the shape of a hawk.

    Maybe he'll be more decisive next time?_


  • _Trends get my hair to stand on end.

    It's a little like standing in the woods, and noticing that there's more deer hanging about than usual… And then my mind takes off without the rest of me, and I see the population boom, it's effect on the land, the following growth of predator populations, the subsequent hunting, then overhunting, then...

    Ugh. I could write that for an hour.

    Between the damnable goblin fight, then the GIANT orc... Seriously he was like, giant big, and then the cheif.... Something messed up is happening.

    Or I'm interpreting a trend where there is none.

    Either way, all of them were almost completely immune to magic. I'm no super badass, but my magic generally takes a bite out of whatever is screwing with me. Artemis IS a badass, and for the two of those he was there for... His didn't work either!

    Bullshit. It's just plain bullshit!

    Unless it's something worse than bullshit and I'm right.

    Why does it always SUCK even I'm right?

    At least Artemis is back. I didn't realize how comfortable I am fighting beside him, even if he does forget what he's capable of sometimes. That, and I worry about him, now. Apparently the Nexus war got worse after I left, and it's left a mark on him. I want to say I'm going to help him... But is that even my right?

    Maybe I'll try to make it my right._


  • _BEEBLE

    I made a friend today, and it started with a poacher attack.

    Three animals came for me while I was standing outside my treehouse, spelling myself up for the day's trials yet to come, whatever they may be.

    Gods, did my habits serve me well today.

    A bear came to me, rubbing up against my leg while I distractedly stared off in thought, just before a hawk landed upon my shoulder. I pat the bear, and fed the hawk, and a dog approached, whom I noticed was bleeding some.

    I healed him, but found that his injuries were worse than I thought, and were caused by a sword. As were those on the bear. And the hawk? It had an arrowhead lodged in him, and clipped wings, so he could not fly far. It was a wonder he made it to me at all.

    I mended the creatures, with herb and with spell, and the branches scattered outside my home gave notice of the bandit looking thugs that approached before their voices and smell did. They approached, and told me that I had something of theirs, so I made them tell me what, playing dumb and riling them up.

    They claimed that they were dealing under the table with Norwick for animals illegally…

    I muttered a quiet prayer, and a dedication to the storm lord of their lives, should they press me, and continued making them speak, asking them what would happen should I deny them. Naturally ... they threatened my life, so I smiled, thanked them for telling me all I needed to hear, and smote them down, all three at once, with a mighty trio of bolts, courtesy of Talos and one angry Woods Witch.

    Two smoldering corpses and a crater later, I saw it. A faint light to my side, that I could -swear- was observing me the whole time.

    This ... this must have been what Ros was talking about. Beeble. Thank the GODS she'd forewarned me about a dream eating maniac called Beeble. I would have been in serious trouble had I not been prepared ...

    We talked for an hour nearly, politely, as I laid my hand out immediately and addressed him by name, bidding him to simply make me his offer and be on his way. That thoroughly impressed him, and after complimenting me on my prowess, eventually led the conversation back to discussing his deal. I agreed, but upon a condition ... and I brought us back to the Nexus where I have started my successful dreamwalks.

    It's like an island, but it is alone in the dark.

    It's neutral. It's safe. It's isolated. It's familiar, but only as familiar as something you've barely seen can be.

    Sounded perfect, and there we went. He was impressed, despite acting wounded that I would be so cautious when he'd been so polite, but I made him see the reason for my caution, and he made me his first offer. His aid in fighting nightmares, both in my natural dreams, and in the dreamscape.

    I told him that I already -had- that power, and he'd have to do better.

    Secrets for secrets then! My dreams and memories, for knowledge of the NIGHT PARADE.

    I told him I'd never heard of it, shrugged it off, and let him play himself out, giving me information for nothing, even if it was merely tidbits. I had nothing so far, so anything helped.

    I even asked what he wanted, after that.

    I want FREEDOM toots. I'm CAGED. I was caged a long time ago by a pissed off mage who had nothing better to do but experiment on the poor and the helpless.

    I don't look this way by choice, I'll tell you that right now! And I tried to get people around here to help me, to no avail, because they don't understand.

    Lore 21: A few creatures in the Dreamscape eat memories. Or specifically, the dreams of memories and the nightmares they can cause.

    One such thing is called the Dream Vestige ... but it doesn't look like this eye thing. It's a gibbering collection of different nightmares, a necromantic, undead creature that feeds off of nightmares to make itself stronger.

    He never did tell me where his cage was, why he was caged, or HOW to bust it open, but I suspect our next visit will be more informative and interesting, one way or another. I realized I might be pressing too hard, and might give myself away with my subtle information gathering, so I told him:

    "Now, since I respect you and your honesty so far, I'll be straight with ya, Mister Beebs.

    I need my beauty rest, and I don't think you were being entirely honest with me soooo... we can talk again when you're feeling more straightforward. It has been nice, though. this was fun! "

    I stroked the little eyeball image, and said the Sylvan word for "wake" to myself, felt my body's lips move, and with a little Willpower ... I woke.

    The only thing that chased me were it's words.

    Hey, WAIT ... COME BACK HERE ... C'MON, THAT'S NOT FAIR. HEY!

    Now here I am at home, writing it all down, wondering if I did the right thing ... or if I'm in way over my head.

    At least I had a nap!

    SubNote: talked to Ros and Ginger after. Garric Hemway's great grandfather was part of the night parade, Duran Hemway, and found Beedle. Realized the danger, and sealed him in the prison. Couldn't kill Beedle, had some kind of affection for it.

    Shortly after -that- talk, I was brushing my hair for once, a little self conscious that I was once again hanging out with beautiful people... first it's my sister, then people like Isolde, and now Atel! ... and two goblins point to us, and scamper off after nodding, so I blasted them to hell with lightning. Whatever they were up to, it couldn't be good, right?

    Turns out another goblin was trying to find a wife for his chief, who brought his tribe here from the Lost City, thanks to ... guess who? No really, guess.

    Can you figure it out?

    It's Elvadriel. Of FARKING COURSE it's Elvadriel. It's always her.

    Anyway, a survivor runs to get more, a small army shows up, and we're blasting and slashing and farking them up, Me, Belia, Atel, Ginger, and Ros ... and some fark-all huge ones show up with Axes, and try their best to take Atel's head off.

    They nearly succeeded. She dropped like a sack of flour, and since I had stoneskin on, I trusted Talos to have my back, dropped my weapons, and dove over her to try to stop the bleeding.

    The side of her neck was open, and her eyes were staring at the sky, blinking, and blank. I closed the wound with a handful of wet herbs from my pouch and a bandage that probably almost choked the poor gal, before applying healing magicks. I hear that quick and dirty healing when someone's that far gone is rumored to have some nasty side effects...

    She blinked properly, then, her eyes focusing on me, and I forced her to stay down a minute, while the lightning struck around the friends still fighting the goblin chopping at my stoneskinned back.

    I didn't even realize how hurt I was until I started checking on the others, and realized that some of that blood on me smelled like my own.

    Long story short ... she made it. We rested at my place, and the goblin that we let live after an interesting, magic-proof battle brought us tribute! I got a new pack and another ring of healing for when I do the traditional healing stuff to help keep my hands steady as I cut, and gentle as I mend.

    She played a nice song, later, and hugged me on her way out, whispering thank you in my ear.

    Sometimes, it's those little things that make your entire day._


  • _Don't let paranoia win. She says.

    She, of course, being the lady I met only briefly before, here in the commons of Peltarch. Everything is shinier here, including the people!

    So there I was, minding my own business, when up walks this really, I mean like, Elaine level of pretty woman. Turns out her name is Isolde Girasomethingorother. A bardess, of course, and apparently noble too? Another noblewoman Jessica somethingorother (Gods I'm awful with names today, I must be too worked up) flounced her way over, insulting everyone as she came along, claiming we weren't invited to her little party of some sort, a masquerade … but Isolde got an invitation from a "Mysterious masked man!"

    I'd say I'm envious, but I tend to stab those types first, and ask questions later. Life must be more romantic when you're noble... I don't know!

    After some back and forth, Isolde flaunting her invitation, me perhaps charming me way onto the list through the lady's poor abused butler (Monty! Jessica couldn't even call him by his name!), some guards came up to investigate a THEFT! The little piss-addled hare-brained, mewling quim of a misbegotten tavern wench reported Isolde for STEALING the invitation. I may not know this lady well, but I was willing to bet my biscuits ten minutes in that Isolde was ten times the woman this Jessica was.

    10 minutes after -that-, and one guard frisking later since I had them frisk me instead of her, all was well and clear, and I'd made a new acquaintance.

    Today, however, I had news for her apparent Paramour, the mysterious Nathan Wingates. He's supposedly older than MY Dad, but looks my age, and some mutual friends wanted me to pass along a message, so I did, with Isolde there in tow.

    I'm so ... conflicted.

    I passed along the information, and did my best to exaggerate it's importance, especially since it involved my one time friend Elvadriel, who they apparently trust with their lives. Or at least Isolde does. Nathan was quieter, and Isolde and I went at great length back and forth about not only Elvadriel, but the Subject of Great Import that Elvadriel is involved in. I daren't write more details than that because for all I know, parties unknown might kill me and get this journal, and if they do, and it's you reading this, Suck the Balls of a Juggling Ogre!

    They agreed to check in on their friend, but only out of love and caring, and refuse to see my suspicions, despite confirming that yes, Elvadriel is, in fact, a Necromancer.

    Fark.

    They claim she's a Sirion kind of necromancer, purely academic ... but I suspect that there's rarely such a thing. Especially since they said they know that she will in fact control Undead. They can't confirm she won't raise them, nor deny it...

    I'm no Paladin.

    I'm not EVEN CLOSE.

    But that's anathema to a Druid. It's a perversion of all that is life. You want me to accept that as being okay? Alright, cool. One more Defiler, coming right up!

    Alright, so maybe that was a touch dramatic, but where the fark does one draw that line? When is it okay to draw something dead from it's rest, and use it for your own means? Would they feel the same about taking domination of a living thing, like a Vampire? One of which apparently killed Nate?

    They took me into the college, and fed me, and shared their drink. They complimented me on the handling of the vamp situation, and praised my actions and bravery and power and skill. They dazzled me with their charm and beauty, and I admit to having found myself thinking awkward thoughts about the both of them, which made me blush and does so even now, since I knew nothing about myself to that effect, even now ... yet ... I don't know what to do but distance myself and wait.

    They care for Elvadriel. A lot. They want to resolve this all peacefully, and condone her actions, which frankly, they have the leisure to do. I, however, cannot. Control and undead to open a negative energy warded door? Okay, sure. Then put it out of it's misery.

    Raise them on your own?

    I'd best see to it that you never get to again.

    Elvadriel and I were friends, once. At least I like to think so. Was I being played, even then?

    I'd best quit writing about this now before I depress even myself. Apologies, dear reader, unless you killed me. In which case, again, Fark off and die.

    We spoke of other things, like my Gnomish Positioning Scroll. I carried one ever since I could afford my first, and my friends could always find me. Even saved my life, once, having it on me. Now I wonder if it has been used against me. Nate cautioned as much, and even Isolde lacks one, but she said to me this.

    "Don't let Paranoia win. "

    She said that's how the badguys get to you, or something along those lines.

    After I took my leave, I sold it to that magic shop elf in Peltarch, and walked away from it. I missed it as soon as I hit the commons, as I usually check it before sitting down to write like I am now, so I can actively fight the loneliness and find some company for adventure or chit chat ... but now I don't think I will again. I've too much to lose.

    Why do I feel like I've lost something all the same, then?

    There's Alvaniel. I should put this away._


  • _I have a date!

    I was sitting in the Commons of Peltarch, writing a letter, and basically feeling sorry for myself for a moment while I had the time to do so. Yeah, it's pathetic, but my mind has been a traitorous bitch lately, and needs to lay off on the lonely feelings.

    Anyway, there I was, writing away and some people wandered up. Rico, a knight looking fellow, and Labur, the tough as nails dwarf who was with us for our Coldstones trip!

    We all ended up deciding to go for a walk after I announced my intention to do so, and away we went. I layered on the spells like I do, and explained the bit about being a little paranoid, and as i was rambling, a white stag appeared. After a brief question about how much it's pelt would cost… It became a Her. Aoth then joined our walk, and we made it to Norwick unmolested. We spoke briefly about assassination attempts along the way, though, so if I disappear under strange circumstances they know where to go sniffing about.

    In Norwick, we talked of armors and stags and fighting pits and food and drink, and had a general good time. Labur passed out some of his peach ale, which was absolutely wonderful! Belia showed us a beautiful white stag armor, she made it without killing any herself, too!

    Labur is also learning to make axes, and I offered to go try them out with him, to which he replied, "It's a date!" In his broken Common speech, so I guess it is a date!

    First date I've had in a long time, too. Hey, I should wear my special ring!_

    An added scribbled in note reads:

    Note to self, get a bell to put on Hen!