3. The Journal of Ael'Que Rahael

The Journal of Ael'Que Rahael


  • So many answers. Not all of them happy ones. Apparently I was living with Lyda. The toys in the chest are for our child she carries. When I saw her, all I remembered was her breaking up with me. I had no memory or feelings of us as a couple. But learning that I am going to be a father has made me feel happier then I thought it would. I want nothing more then to hold that little bundle in my arms. It seems people can not wrap thier minds around the fact that I will not be going back to Lyda. Alexi even tried to spread the vile rumor that I wanted nothing to do with my own child!

    the paper is nearly torn with the force used to write the next words
    NO ONE IS KEEPING ME FROM MY CHILD.

    Other answers, I know who She was. I was very surprised when I figured it out too. And remembering some of my friends has caused me more pain then I thought possible. Some have turned their back on me, for reasons I am sure are legitimate to them and their faith. They ask me to choose between them and Esmeralda.

    Esmeralda. Just saying her name has me smiling like a kid. Kiana says she has never known me to be as happy as I have been with Esme. Seems the journal did not lie when it made my life seem so sad and depressing. All I know is how I am now. Happy.

    Now where is that camping robe?


  • The handwritng seems oddly different then what was written before

    I walked into the room and looked about. So much was familiar. Yet so much was strange. The bowl of strawberries made me smile. I found some womens lingerie. So I lived with someone. The house is neat and clean. And then I find this journal. Much of this I can remember. But some is to cryptic. The basterd Keeper was selective when he took from me. But I still feel it was worth it. Natalie can rest in peace now.

    I turn these pages, and ask myself, who She was? I obviously cared about her a great deal. Enough to give her up for her own happiness. Val said I was a corporal in the legion. this books says it was true, but not why I left. I remember my friends in the legion, Elva, Cara, Lyda. I read in here that Cara died. It was like it just happened for me. Seems like I spent alot of time being sad in this journal. But I do not feel sad. I still remember Esme. I remember Ama and Therean. Xian, Arlan, and Moonie. Kiana and Jin. Risternil and Doni. And I am still alive.

    Why are the childrens toys in the chest?


  • The one She called the love of her life has returned. The one She thought She would never see again. How would I feel if it was Rosy who had come back instead? There really is only one thing for me to do.

    I will not force her to choose.


  • I am no longer Legion. I thought it would sadden me, but instead I am feeling alright about it. I loved the Legion, but after what has happened, I am not sure I could ever go back. The final straw was being near death and having to be escorted to the temple by a near stranger. All the while legionaires stood around and ignored my condition. Even Esbeth, who was once my most trusted friend. It opened my eyes to many things that day.

    So what to do now. I have been offered a job with the Norwick militia. And Aelthes once asked me to join the Defenders. For now I am taking a break from groups. Since we defeated Furlinastis and ended the Shadow war, perhaps now is a time to think of what I really want out of life.

    Lately I have been thinking alot about horse farms.


  • Amazing.

    For the first time in months I have nothing sad to write about! I have been improving in my training. And have spent much time learning my new craft. I have also spent much time studying the way Ama and Draheem and Arlan fight. They have a way of striking from the sides that is devastating. I practice relentlessly on my own. And have even found an instructor to help me as well.

    And even though I am busier then ever, still we seem to find time together. She is one of the best companions in battle I have ever had. She is calm, never reckless. Smart. And when the battles are done, and it is just us, it seems right. We did not start off exactly on the right foot. But it has definately become better. Last night, for the first time, she stayed.


  • Everyday I spend here teaches me a little more about those I would call friends. You can go through your life thinking you know how they feel about you. Then, suddenly you get the wakeup call of reality.

    It seems that someone I knew and trusted has decided I am a user of women, and someone who is not to be trusted. This would not trouble me so much if they had approached me with it. Instead they seek to spread the lies around , causing me to lose the trust of others. Why?

    I grow so weary of this. I do not thnk I have it in me to even care anymore.


  • Note to self. If you know an area is dangerous, and a friend say"lets just take a peek". Smack em in the head and haul them away from there.

    The alternative is far to costly.


  • I once read in a book that life's greatest teacher is Pain. I always believed he meant physical pain. The kind you receiceve when you fail to block that sword thrust from an opponent. Or when as a child you burn yourself on your mothers stove and learn not to touch the hot pot. But since I have come to Narfell I have learned what he truly meant.

    Pain felt at the betrayal of those you called friends. That has taught me that I am far to trusting and kind. I have no choice left to me. That circle of friends I know I can trust has dwindled considerably. It will stay small. I know that the others will continue to bring others to our group, but in my own mind there will always be just us five.

    The pain of loss of a loved one has taught me to treasure each moment left them, for they can be swept from us as suddenly as blowing out a candle. Cara had come back to us after the loss of her son. We started on patrols again, though I could see in her eyes she was missing a part of herself. And then we died in a Horan ambush. Cara came to me in the fugue, she told me she was not coming back. We talked of many things, things I will never even write here. Then I was swept back, and she stayed behind.

    We held her funeral on the cliffs above the Eldath shrine. Though she was only half elf I thought she deserved a proper elven funeral pyre. As I stood watching the flames consume the first real friend I had when I came to Norwick, a woman of unsurpassing beauty appeared. It was Cara's goddess. Sune. She had come to take Cara home. And when the flames finally faded to ashes I realized that for the first time in years, the tears I shed had not been tears of pain but tears of happiness. I knew Cara was in a better place and more importantly, she was with her son.


  • We have the Shards, but before we could go to the Keeper Val has been taken by the Shadovar! I am trying to help in the search, but when it comes to thngs magical I am out of my league. We have to find her. I just hope she is alive when we do. But the days are passing and no further word from anyone leaves me feeling afraid for her.

    The only bright light in all this is I have spent more time with Her, time I did not think I would have. When I gave Her a gift, the look I received was almost enough to make me rethink my plans. But, that soul needs to be freed.

    But first we find Val.


  • I have found the Shield, with the help of Therean and Daviel and of course Elsbeth. It is even better then I thought it would be, a veritable wall against axe and spear. And on command it projects a circle that no sound can penetrate.

    Lately I have been deeply troubled. I purchased a soul shard from an Oscuran. He was selling the evil thing right in the middle of the commons. I did not want that to be used by someone, I knew this would destroy the soul trapped within. So I purchased it. I am sure they all thought I meant to use it myself.

    I brought it to Daisy at the Triad. I had hoped she might release the soul so it would be able to find peace. Unfortunately she could not. She did tell me the soul was that of a female mercenary who had become a slave. She said the only way to release the soul was to find the maker and convince him to do it. She told me to seek out Val, for Val had brought a similar crystal to her once before and knew much about them.

    And that is where my trouble comes from. According to Val the maker is an Immortal called the Keeper. He makes deals with lost souls, taking a piece of thier soul in trade for showing them to thier final rest. Somehow six came into the possesion of nobles from Oscura. Val had four and mine made five. We need to find the sixth. Then we can travel to the realm of the Keeper and somehow convince him to release the souls. There might only be one form of payment he will take. I have decided to pay that price if need be. I am leaving this journal here in my room. If someone finds it and is reading this, means I did not make it back.

    I just hope She knows I love her and She forgives me for not coming back.


  • Well, for the first time ever I sit and write in this Journal in my own room. I was recently promoted to Corporal in the legion and since there are so many empty rooms, Captain Benji authorized me to have one.

    Our little family continues to grow. The names are quickly becoming numerous enough to need to write them down just to keep track. But I do see a difference already. Many elves who in the past would barely acknowledge our presence now seem to seek us out. Perhaps this will lead to the founding of a new elven camp, or perhaps at least the reclaiming of the old. We can only hope and pray that this happens.

    Lastly, I have been researching a Spellsword who was rumored to have made equipment that could be used in battle against mages. Of partcular interest are the shields he enchanted. They produced a circle of silence around them which prevented many mages and evil priests from casting their spells. My research shows that at least one of these shields was used by a hero in this area. I am getting closer to it. It is just a matter of time.


  • Trusting in my family and friends was never more rewarding then it was today. Elsbeth , myself, Liisa and Vugar all went to patroll the Norwick crypts. The first side went well, but on the second side I was swarmed by the numbers of undead. My companions reacted swiftly. With Lisa and Vugar holding the doorway, almost to their death and Liisa becomiing sickened by the creatures foul bite. Elsbeth, with no hesitation leapt to my aide, managing to stop the bleeding and stabilize me. All the while her beautiful clear voice singing to bolster the others in the battle.

    The result was they were victorious, and Elsbeth saved my life. She has proven herself over and over with our small family. And though not one drop of elven flows through her veins, still I am proud to call her sister. I need to find a way to show her how much she means to us. At least I know her favorite drink now. That will be a start.


  • I almost laugh at myself as I write this. I should have learned long ago. I can only trust myself, my family, and the Swords. I was asked by Sessa to go to the crypts. I agreed, since she was strong with her gods blessings. We arrived, and she cast blessings on me and we went in. It was perfect! We defeated the first group with only minor injuries.

    Then Terno showed up. Still things went very smooth. Untill we rested. Then it changed. She cast her blessings on the bard. Leaving none for me. I guess I was foolish to assume the bard would be able to provide some magical enhancements, because he never did. And then, to my stunned disbelief, she cast her silence spell on the bard! What was worse was he told her to!

    Yes, I could have left such foolishness. Yes I did not have to run in when the bard was close to falling, so he could be healed. Had I done the selfish thing, I would have lived. Instead I sit here, lessened again. And now the lesson has been learned. Know who to trust before you go.


  • For once I am going to write about nothing but happy events! We had the dance in honor of the Seldarine. Ama'bael did a superb job organizing it and with Therean and Elsbeth and Uniel's help, it was flawless. The band and food was excellent! And then Sy'Wyn told an excellent version of the history of the elves. Followed by a beautifull poem by Ama'bael.

    I danced most of the night with Elsbeth, who has become every bit as close to me as Ama and I proudly call her Sister, though she is not of our blood. Had some dances with Elva, and Tindra, and Ama. Uniel pulled guard duty at the last minute so had to miss it. I missed her and almost let myself get bogged down with worry for her. But I knew she was alright. I saved the dress Ama had made for her though, we will just have to have our own private dance soon.


  • Well, since over half of this journal is empty, I decided not to waste the paper. I continue in my duties for the Legion, now with Uniel almost constantly by my side. A dangerous place I have had to learn the hard way. We both fell during an attack on the gates. Uniel fell first, and I have never in my life experienced such instant and blinding pain. The sense of loss and emptyness was near overwhelming. Ama grabbed us both by herself and carried us to the temple. We both recovered, a little worse for wear. While in the fugue I promised Sehanine, I would learn to fight better, both armed and unarmed. Not just better, but smarter to. I never want my Love to feel that kind of pain on my behalf.


  • I am thinking on closing this journal. Last night the Swords drank a toast to new beginnings. And has I lay here, looking over at Uniel as she sleeps, I can not help but think an all new beginning might be nice. So it just might be time close this one for good. Time to start a new one.

    Now thats strange, how in the hells do I know she is hungry? She is not even awake yet!


  • Some things you do can never be undone. The words you say can never be taken back. No matter how much you wish it to be so.


  • There is something to be said for staying busy. I have volunteered to help Ama with the dance she is organizing. And have been out patrolling with many different friends. Today Ama took me to the Peltarch public bathouse. We talked of many things, and I told her of how different I have found life to be here.

    In Chondallwood, our tribe was never as open and friendly as many of the people here. With the exception of Uniel, I never had many friends. And definately never had a woman look twice at me. Now, it seems that some women do find something in me to like, or maybe more. Here they seem to judge more on actions, then looks. And though there are some who seemed wrappped up in their own little worlds, most people will always help or listen when needed.

    Well not all people. I have often pondered how the powerfull here can so easily dismiss those of us who seek to help. The planar rifts, or alternate realities, are an example. Many of the people I know have offered to help, myself included. But when we are there,, and have even traveled to these alternates we are treated more as tagalongs, then as a member of the group.

    Last night was the last straw for me. It is bad enough that the most powerfull sorcerer I know refuses to ever take into account that not all those around him are protected from damage by magic, which gets a lot of people hurt or killed. But now as a group, he and the others have taken it upon themselves to try to stop an event that could destroy Peltarch in a matter of days! And do they warn the citizens? Give the people a chance to flee. Or take the help freely offered by others? Hell no, they are the most powerfull force in the world! No way they can lose! The truly sad thing is, I had far more respect for them before all this. Do they not remember what happened to Jiyydd when just a few thought they new everything.


  • (( The handwriting is sloppier then normal, and there are small winestains on the parchment))

    Been drinking to much today. Trying to forget I suppose. It really does not seem to work as well as I had hoped. We had a Legion patrol through the gnoll woods. Uniel was along, and Benji made her officially a Private. So that was good. We still make a good team, still can anticipate were the other will swing. It was like the old days back in Chondallwood.

    Aloura was not there,, no sign of her all week. But, that is how she is I guess. Far more secretive then others I know. Ended up drinking with Benji and Persy in the Mermaid. Did I mention Persy died? We found her body up where those dam corpsethiefs hang out. I need to patrol that area more often. Anyways, after Benji left, Yuki showed up. She is a very different girl when she drinks. Much friendlier then her usually reserved self. Almost made me think she might like me. Strange. She will probably be back to normal after she is sober.

    End of the night I gave Persy a tour of the tower. She has a great sense of humor, and managed to make me laugh a few times. We hung out down in the bunk house until the early morning hours.

    And through it all, no matter who I am talking to, I still see your face. I have heard that time heals all. That people forget the faces of past loves. How I wish I could leap forward in time to the point where I have forgotten yours.

    (( The final few stains seem to have ben left by something other then wine,,something more like water))


  • (( Hastily written in a very shaky hand))

    Note to self, stop saving potions and start using them. They do you no good when you die.