3. Thoughts of a squishy scout - Thorns journal.

Thoughts of a squishy scout - Thorns journal.


  • I feel lighter.. more, myself. More me than what I have been recently. It really is all thanks to Fadia.

    Through everything shes been beside me. Right beside me actually. Shes rarely left my side unless it was of great importance. And.. I've been stupid, completely and utterly stupid. Trying to push her away at times, caught up in worry, in fear.. self pity? She knows me for who I am, what I am and with all the mess I come with, shes accepted that, happily.. and..

    No more. No I can't go on living this way. Going on as if I could never love another.. its, just stupid. Can I love Fadia as I do Adriell? Honestly, no. I'll never be able to have that with Fadia. Does it mean I can't or don't love her? No, not in the slightest. Will Fadia be able to love me as she did Oreth? Of course not, nothing that strong. But that doesn't mean she doesn't, or can't love me. There will always be thoughts of Oreth in her mind, as there will always be thoughts of Adriell in mine. Its not something we can change.

    Many people, myself included always go about thinking to find 'the one'. The one person in all their life that can complete them. Do I believe this impossible? No, its possible. But to think that only -one- person in all of toril will be that person? It doesn't make much sense. Were I to have met Fadia before Oreth, would we be as we are now? Would we have bonded? Possibly. Would that Fadia, Adriell and myself were scattered to the farthest reaches never to meet in our long lives. Would we all have found someone so akin to us to be -that one-. I believe we would.

    Adriell is my bonded, and as such, no matter where she is, goes, or will be that is what she'll remain. Even with her gone, I still love her. I'm left with confusion, doubt and worry. But I still love her. If I could have one wish it would be to know where she is. But.. not even Fate knows where she is. Its as clear as the visions I've been seeing. Visions meant for her, passed onto me. I've no doubt I'll see her again. I'm young still, and have many many years to live if I don't do anything overly stupid. It may be ten years from now, or it may be hundreds of years from now when Norwick and Peltarch has fallen ten times over and the rawlins burnt down and grown back from whatever enemies that may try.

    But I will not be misserable. I'm sick of it. Others are sick of it. Squeaks put it quite bluntly that she is. And as patient as Fadia is, she'd much rather see me happy. All I have to do is.. stop being so stupid.

    Fadia cares deeply for me, and I her. I can't deny that. And I have to stop beating myself up over it thinking it is wrong.


  • I'm sick of the shadovar and their stupid war.. so many fell.. and Troff hasn't come back. He'll come back.. I know he will. Yngdir came back, took him a while but he came back.

    Squeaks took it hard, first Cara and now Troff, shes angry at them, for giving up, for leaving her… and as much as I try to rationalize it, the truth is, they did..

    I met a woman today though, named Kara. She was very nice, very polite. Though.. I swear she could stare straight into my soul if she wanted. Fadia knew her, and she helped me understand some of the visions..

    DarkThorn. All I know is he's a very powerfull, evil thing with a desire to cause despair and corruption. He's also called Thorn of darkness ... which even though has its ironic humor, should be taken seriously.

    Theres so much about all of this I don't know, Fadia and Kara just talked away about.. a bunch of stuff that I couldn't even grasp at.

    I did get my second vision translated though.

    "The Bearer of Light has died, so that others may live.
    Thorn of Darkness lingers, his shards taint and consume.
    Their taint will spread and Hope will falter, and by her pain will Despair be free.
    Within the dark night, Stars of Fate must shine together... or the world will be covered in shadows."

    ...

    Visions suck.

    Fadia will explain more soon.. just need to pull myself together. Adriell would know everything here.. she would know all this. What these visions meant, what to do, when? But.. shes not.. shes not.

    So it falls on me. Not a druid. Not a caster, not a powerfull priest or priestess, or a diviner or a seer. Gods what can I do here?


  • Another night, another vision.. though this one doesn't seem as horrible or dark as the last. Just confusing.. very confusing.

    A woman with brown hair was sitting by a fire under a starry night sky. She was wearing clothes made up of all sorts of furs.. which seemed to fit as everything around her was covered in snow. She threw some odd rune stones in front of her and studied them.. her eyes almost seemed.. trance like.. then she started to speak. Unfortunately its a language I don't know.. so attempting to write it down has proved.. pointless.

    Fortunately I remember it perfectly, and can just repeat what I heard. At least one word she said I know. Toril.

    After her.. weird language. She blinked.. then frowned, and began to write.. wish I saw more but … that was it.

    Visions suck that way.

    On the bright side I was able to have a nice walk with Eluriel. We spoke of a few things, weird ghosts... odd happenings around the woods. Sy, his bow. Eluriels bows and who she crafted them for. Even her current suit of armor. She hates the colors, says they're bland. I don't believe it matters much. The colors were very woodsy, and she looked good in them. Its not the color of the suit thats important, but the elf inside. Eluriel is Eluriel, even if she isn't wearing blue.

    I enjoyed our walk, talk, hobgoblin hunt.. thing. Even gave her the scroll I'd been saving for her. Didn't mention the second vision.. as, well, it would have probably ruined the walk. Maybe tommorow.


  • I've spoken with others. My elders first. Eluriel and Sy. Sy didn't say much, though Eluriel said alot. At first she seemed to think it was all a lie, some trick being played on me, that the vision held no truth. But then she said other things. Things that made sense, in a way.

    Maybe the feather is me, represents me. That I've been left alone, in a cold wasteland, falling. Or maybe its not. Maybe its all just.. a lie?

    I talked with Jerrick on it too. The first thing he pointed out was.. quite honestly the one thing I dread most. Could the feather be my connection to Adriell? Could it be the bond? Broken in half and covered in blood..

    Is it meant to break?

    I.. hope not.

    This all over feeling of my life being threatened at every moment.. its heavy. I don't want it to break, I don't want to hurt Adriell, and.. to be honest I'm scared to die this way. I've died before, but had plenty if things pushing me to come back. To keep going. But I've seen first-hand what happens when a bond breaks.. if I died, I don't think I could come back. If I lived.. would I be myself, or, a hollow shell of who I was?

    I should have some things done, just in case.

    I hugged Raryldor for the first time. I've known him a long time, but never once hugged him untill now. Despite all he's done and been through, he is still my elder. He's saved my life a few times, and has always treated me as a young one. Though, I believe I found some measure of respect with him that one day with the bugbear. Its not so often you have to save the life of a powerfill priest.

    I would like to carry on a casual conversation with Eluriel. I can't seem to do that without tripping over my own thoughts, saying something stupid, or forgetting what semblance I have left of proper manners. Shes always been a symbal in my life, specially as a pup. Proper, elegant, and skilled as I'll probably never be. And even with all that, she suprises me on occasions with her behavior. Shes truly a riddle within a puzzle within yet another riddle, and one I'm glad that I haven't been able to figure out.

    More later I guess, the sun is rising.


  • Things are going from bad to worse… bad to worse. Or maybe its not as bad as I fear..

    fear, is that the cause?

    Start at the beggining.. I was in norwick, Elidur is back.. he made some, brutally true comment about my relationships that, put me in a horrible mood. I left.. wanting to go home. Squeaks and Fadia following. I became tired.. very tired. I managed, barely, to get home to the den with Fadias help. Nearly making it to a bed.. we colapsed on the floor.

    Waking up. We were surrounded by snow, in a dark land.. with nothing around us but a vast emptiness of snow covered hills.

    There was a black feather floating in the air before us. I tried to reach out to grab it.. it seemed familiar.

    But then everything stopped. The snow, the feather, time itself.. all but myself and Fadia. Everything was hanging in place, frozen.

    The fey of nightmares showed up, upset, angry.. something went wrong with this dream he set up. It was a messege, for an elf.. he pulled out his notes, and began weaving darkness into the form of an elven woman.. one, that.. was all too familiar.

    It was for Adriell.. the black feather from before, the one I gave her.. the one she always had in her hair. I had to describe her.. down to her last detail.. she was deffinately the one this.. dream messege was meant for.

    The fey made a mistake.. he couldn't find her, he only had her aura.. and brief description to go on, from someone he reffered to as 'Fate'. He pulled me, accidently.. because our auras are.. mixed.

    He said, since I am her bonded, he should allow the messege to continue, and I agreed.. hoping in some way to figure all this out.

    Time went back, snow fell up, then paused as it was once we first arrived. Fadia caught the black feather as it fell. It was deffinately hers.. there was no doubt about it. When the feather landed in Fadias hand.. it was covered in blood, and broken in half. The thought of what that could mean.. it shook me. Untill a woman screamed off into the distance.

    We approached a woman, one.. who I couldn't recognize. She screamed 'NO!! YOU BETRAYED US!' while caught in a red magical prison. Standing before a large ghost of some sort.. I'm not a paladin, or a priest, but I could feel the evil from that thing the moment I stepped close. It was chanting, casting spells on her.. killing her, and there was nothing we could do to stop it. It was as if, we weren't even there.

    "Hope dies" are the words it said when she fell, drawing her last breath.

    It took something from the ground beside her corpse.. a gem of some sort, possiblt a diamond.

    "And now Despair will blanket the lands..."

    As it laughed.. a horrible dark laugh. It started to get darker, darker, untill eventually nothing was seen but its red eyes. Then we awoke.. back in the floor at the den.

    I let Fadia out.. but I haven't left the den since. Only the feys words are keeping me from.. just breaking right now.

    "Oh yes, the feather is important. Just be carefull what you interperet of it."


  • Dondiah has returned home, I just wish it was on better circumstances. I feel horrible for not having the foresight to have protected her from the mess shes in. But then again.. its the same thing I myself am going through. She has me though, and she has Fadia. Good place to start rebuilding life.

    Jerrick spoke with me recently about my problems. He couldn't very well tell me what to do. But he offered advice. Do what makes me happy. As the years pass by.. I have to do just that. Do I want to be misserable for the next five, ten? What of the next hundred years, and beyond that? I can't say I like the thought of all that time passing, and me being stuck feeling this way.

    Take action. He said.

    So I did. Did something I've always wanted to do. Gathered up a bunch of rope, took Dondiah up to sams hill.. or sams hole. Planning on climbing down to explore that cave by the waters. Dondaih had to leave.. and that left me with. Helena.. Some caster girl I didn't know. And thank the gods Jerrick. Those girls took me back to my days of Hedia and Clandra. They did make things fun though. The whole cavern was full of troglodytes. Lizards I haven't seen since years back, south in the rawlins. It was all and all an easy adventure. Untill of course we got chased out of the cave by a red dragon. It was on our heels the whole run through, stomping, swiping, breathing fire. Crawling through the small corridors and busting through to get to us.

    I felt alive!

    We got out, and the dragon was too big to follow us back out into the pass. But now I know where a dragon is should I ever feel the need to have dragon skin.

    Something else of note.. land-sharks … sneeze when they sniff me.


  • I think alot when I'm up on these cliffs.

    Its nice up here, when you climb high enough you can see past the tree tops and look down over all the rawlins, all of norwick. You can see spellweaver keep sticking up. And to the north if you look hard enough theres peltarch off in the distance.

    I've been here a very long time. Seen these lands and its people go through so much. War, always war. Fightning never ends. It doesn't matter how many goblins I take down, more will always replace them. The undead never rest, they always rise back up. It doesn't matter where people gather, there will always be struggles. Be it against evil creatures, or against themself. Fightning and war must just be in their nature. I'm somewhat greatfull we have goblins, undead and the like. With them around, a constant threat to the lives of the people that live here. They don't turn on each other, but instead, band together to take down a common enemy. Most times anyway.

    Theres been alot more elves about. Its nice to see, but makes me wonder. Is it my place to climb down, and hold their hands as they make their adventures? I think back to my asbence with my sister Eli. How young, and reliant she was on me before then. Upon my return she had grown up, even became headmaster of the scouts, and a loving mother of three. Was it my coddling that kept her from becoming who she is now? I try my best to help others, but maybe I overdo it, maybe I smother them, and cause more harm than good.

    Maybe its not my place. But as Rith once told me about the menhirs. You can't just turn them off. War, battles, life itself. Its the same way. It will go on with or without me meddling in its affairs.

    I do love watching the starting steps of new adventurers. I love seeing them go from the green bloods to seasoned warriors. Watching them grow and seeing how life here shapes and molds them into the people they will be. A nudge here, a helping hand there, and I can also set into motion change in their lives.

    Maybe I meddle too much, but then again, maybe I think too much.


  • Jerricks house wasn't my first choice in places to sit and think.. specially not on this.

    Why did I even climb down from my cliffs that morning? I knew I was going to walk back into a mess. Seeing the destroyed gates of norwick was just a welcome saying 'Welcome back, now here deal with this'.

    I stepped into the gates, to be greeted by many of my elven friends. And a gem, the same glowing black sapphire I saw in Frosts vision. After much debate on what to do with it.. Ama'bael decided it was best put in my hands. Why? Well I wish I knew.

    The man, the -he- Frost always reffered to. The one behind all the undead, behind her imprisonment upon that altar in the cavern covered with ice. For as long as Frost has been appearing, everytime anyone so much tries to help her, get to her, save her. Her ghost vanishes, and undead swarm. -He- faught against us to keep us away from her, from this? And now at seemingly random its practically -handed- to us. Found in a hobgoblin cave? Something doesn't seem right.

    The fey thats been tormenting everyone. Rico claims shes evil, wouldn't doubt it. She wants the gem destroyed, shattered, for whatever reason I don't know. Can't possibly lead to anything good.

    Emma, I asked her to look at the gem. She says its shiney, and there is something within, trapped, thats akin to her. Emma is but a soul of a seven year old girl. Frost is around that age, or seems to be. I'm sure Frost is inside this gem, her soul anyway.

    Destroying it would release her. Or should. But why would -he- want us to release her soul after he spent so long putting it inside the gem? We may have her soul but he has her body, possibly still upon that altar…

    This is becoming a headache.. I need someone that knows a little on the arcane to possibly help. Peppy showed her face, but she was less than helpfull. Even so.. her words have some weight to them. And oddly, she did not once try and force me to do what she wanted, as shes always tried in the past.


  • I'm calm.. though why I'm calm I'm not sure. I was pissed, I should still be. I spent years building a friendship with Myrrha, and now thats gone, thrown down a chasm. It sucks.

    I've come to accept that, no matter how closely you hold onto people. How nice you are to them, what you give them, how you treat them or the time you spend with them. Once its gone, its gone. If they decide to leave, theres nothing you can do. They're going to leave. You'll miss them, want them back, wish they never left and even get angry.. but none of that will change the fact that they aren't there.

    Friends, family, loved ones.. they come, they go, they live and they die. Its the constant cycle of things it seems. All we can do is accept it as it is. Hold them close when you can, when they're there. Enjoy your time with them when you still have them. And make the best with what you still have when they're gone.

    Its almost bittersweet. Though, the sweet times most deffinately outweigh the bitter.

    Easy to say 'Tommorows a brighter day' when its dark outside.


  • Had a nice day today I guess.. Blew up some big rocks outside the south gate with Squeaks and Rico. Only it wasn't the three of us out there for long. Rico decided it best to leave Squeaks and I there, alone, in the middle of the night, under a fullmoon. Heh.. ah Rico, he has no idea.

    Squeaks is always fun to run around with though. Chased her up to the grapevine untill she found Garviels lap to flop on. I needed some time to think, so I left Garviel alone. And now here I sit, in this room upstairs.

    Few odd things to note.. I haven't seen Rith in a few days. She could just be up in peltarch with Val. No telling what those two could be up too. Or maybe something for the order, I don't know.. I'll take a trip north tommorow, poke around.


  • Long life.. or happiness. Can't she have both? Maybe its too much to ask.. I hope shes doing okay, she claims shes happy but shes always lost in thought. I'm not sure what I would do, were I in her boots. She'll always do what Lathander wants.. this I'm sure of.

    Other than that..

    The dance.. ugh.. I keep getting asked. My options are either, go willingly. Go against my will. Be kidnapped and taken. Portal sword to another plane. Or find Myrrha and hide in her tree. If.. thats even possible.

    Dancing isn't that difficult. Dondiah taught me a few things way back when.. so did another Eliistraeen in front of the sisterhood one day. Am I good enough for a dance? No, probably not. Willing to try? Also no. The truth is, this is a dance to honor the seldarine. Theres going to be many elders there. Formalities should be known by heart, things I don't know. I'm not the most formal of elf, I hardly understand half the customs of our culture. And I've been living around norwick long enough to know I'll probably insult someone accidently.

    I could always ask Aramuil … No, just no.


  • Every dawn. New chance, new day, new life. And we now have two new little ones. Jerrick, Lorie, and Tindra have their hands full. Its not going to be easy on them with the twins, but they'll make it. Jerrick for one is too stuborn to ever admit he's in over his head though.. best stay close just in case.

    My responsabilities seem to have jumped up a little. With Jerrick out of the den and everyone off, busy or.. still missing. Its up to me to take care of our little dragon. He's not so little anymore, not big but.. he's getting fat. Maybe he'll grow into his stomach? Not the best of company, but better than a silent den.

    Hopefully it won't stay silent for long. I've two I'm keeping my eyes on for our family. One, my own personal archer-girl, Alenah. Shes young, her skills need sharpening, but her wit is about as sharp as it can get, almost a match with mine? We'll see.

    My other family? Rith is happier now, shes smiling more and everything seems to be going well. I can only hope Theraen comes back with news on the spell and what we'll need. She has high hopes for this.

    Little Lune. Growing up strong. Shes been training hard and it shows. I just wish there was more I could help teach her, to help her along. But really, I'm no priestess.

    Fadia seems to be doing alright. Though with her its hard to tell. Shes probably upset with me about the dance.. Also.. about some other trouble..

    My elven family.

    Eluriel and Meril have run into a spot of trouble. I was told about it by Fadia, but then had to convince Fadia not to -do- anything. Gods know she means well, but in cases like this … or any matter of sensitive feelings, she tends to make things worse. It sounds to me as if all Meril needs to do is talk to Eluriel, though shes not making that easy for him. I'd talk to Eluriel myself.. but its odd around her. Her mood can change in a heartbeat and her whims are somewhat random. I sometimes feel as if I'm around two women at once when around her.

    Ael'Que! He's brought a bit of good news into my life. He's doing well, him and Uniel. Have to admit I saw it coming. He was talking about bonding with me while we were out on a hunt.. I wish I could have been happier for him, I really do.

    Squeaks and Delfie. Squeaks I thought I had all figured out, but she suprised me one day. Sitting down, talking to me one on one. Serious conversation, with no jokes, no pranks. Then we got bored of that and started goofing off as normal. Learned she doesn't like to be hugged. I think its because she feels trapped in hugs, at the mercy of the other person. So she replaces hugs with kisses.

    Delfie on the other hand. I've not seen the side of her she hides from people. Not physical mind you, shes deffinately -not- shy. But shes always been the playfull energetic girl I first met. Though, her current antics have leaned towards the cute side.

    Right, time to feed the dragon breakfast, then grab a bite for myself.


  • Another day in norwick, another day something odd happens. Started nice, everyone gathered about the fire in a circle, talking. They were discussing Frost, the ghost girl thats been visiting people lately. In her wake, undead attack. Something isn't quite right about this whole situation..

    Frost nearly killed me once, but it was while she showed me a vision of herself on an altar in what I'm sure is a small cavern in the cold caves. I'm trying to gather equipment to help me survive another of her visions. So far I have a cloak. I'm hoping Squeaks can make me other things.

    Everyone at the fire seemed shocked by how much I knew … is it such a suprise I actually know stuff?

    Despite what we were talking on. Eluriel seemed to -hint- at the dance thats coming up. I know she can be subtle.. she did not try.

    There was also some odd undead attack at the gates. It didn't seem like much, so I kept back, letting Delfie handle it. Shes come a long way, and handled herself well. Only, the attack started to become dangerous, and I had to step in.

    To end the strange attack, a floating, burning greatsword started to fly towards us, taking as many swipes as it could. My ice-blade made short work of it..

    Uniel said she could use the greatsword, so we let her. Only it took controll of her body, making her powerfull, and invincable. She could have hurt the others, but I held her off.. have to admit, haven't had a swordfight like that in a while. It was fun.

    Uniel is fine, the sword is gone. Everyone is safe for now and Delfie is bandeged up, resting in her stump. Not a bad day.


  • Trapped.

    Many years ago, Lorie invited me to her den to enjoy the hot-springs with her. But I never took her up on the offer.

    Now here I am, brought by Fadia for the same thing. Only.. Fadia seems to have fallen asleep on me. She must have been exausted from the cold cave trip. I'll leave her be for now.

    Found a lion. Friendly enough, keeping me company. Loves attention thats for sure.. sometimes I wish I were a druid so I could talk to animals.

    The gates locked, so I'll either have to search through Fadias things for a key.. or wait for Rith or Lorie to come home and let me out.

    …

    Could not find it in Fadias bag. The whole thing is a jumbled mess, she really needs to organize it better.

    Rith will save me.. I hope.


  • Helpless.. helpless and stupid. I took Delfie and Albry to collect skins for Squeaks.. first the cat-cave in the pass, and after that to try our hands at manticores..

    Such a stupid mistake..

    We were surrounded.. giants and manticores all around us. I heard Delfie scream, then Albry… spikes stabbed into my back, my vision was blurring...

    I barely managed to get them out of there. Carrying those two.. wasn't easy. Peltarch seemed so far away, the temple even further. And every step was just a small reminder.. that I couldn't do a thing to protect them.

    Albry seems okay now, shes resting.

    Delfie was a bit shook up, probably still is.. but she won't let it show. She won't let me feel bad about it either, or else she'll get upset. She told me I could make it up to her by buying her things. The gnome trapper helmet is what she wanted, so its what she got.

    She also talked me into buying matching strapy outfits for both her and her sister. One green, one red. They were in the same shop.. the girl really is impulsive.

    Squeaks enjoyed her gift. She also loved all the skins we brought her. But she wasn't happy about what happened. Her mood was still good though, I think. She keeping speaking to Delfie in a form of sign language I've not seen before ... They pinned me, and then stabbed my ear.

    It was a very painfull experience.. but, now I have an ear-ring on my left ear. My worry now is they may want one on the right to match.


  • A few others things have happened that should probably be wrote down.. if anything just so I can look back on them as … fond? Memories.

    The Erevan sisters. Delfie and Squeaks.

    I really should be more carefull around them. They are fun, I'll give them that. Their pranks and happy nature make them a joy to be around, specially to watch them prank others. But when they set their sights on you ... they don't hold back. I can't believe I was forced to the ground by them. I know my ears are sensitive.. but damn. Did they have to lick? I can't lie and say I didn't enjoy it.. but damn.

    A day later I was tackled by a wild Squeaks and slammed back into a tree. She sprawled across my lap like she always does and just wanted to talk with me. Rith and the others were having a private conversation. Squeaks needed company, and I didn't mind. Shes cute, and her company is nice. I gave her the jack-knife leathers as a gift. They'll do her good.. well, more good than just sitting in the den going un-used.

    The day after that, I talked with Delfie in her stump, she tried talking to me about Erevan, but I seem a stick in the mud compaired to her and squeaks. After our talk we went for a patroll. We played it sloppy, charging in with my new ice-blade. And her with the axe. By time we made it to the cliffs in the west, we were already pretty banged up. We made camp, and treated our wounds.. its peacefull up there. Probably one of my favorite spots now.

    Despite how playfull she is, how child-like she acts at times. Delfie is a woman, and she reminded me of that fact in a very odd way. I think she was trying to teach me a lesson or.. something. Of course then she did something child-like after.. but, thats just Delfie.

    I've decided to keep both the Erevan sisters.

    I'll probably be taking more trips up to those cliffs. I like being that high up, away from all the troubles back home, if only for a few hours in the day.


  • Its getting easier. Some days its fine, other days its worse, but all in all its not so bad. I've more friends than I could ever ask for. I'd be a mess without them.

    Forced into a room in the bardic college. Fadia and I sat down and had a talk. We needed it, we were hurting our friends with this, specially poor Rith… Decisions were made, choices I"ll stand by. I only hope Fadia does the same.

    But even so more troubles seem to show up out of nowhere.

    Rith is having nightmares, so bad that if shes not sleeping in a temple she wakes up in fright and attacks those near her, or runs away in fear. She nearly killed Fadia.

    I took a chance, keeping her outside, under the tree. It was stupid I know, she could have ended my life with one muttering of a spell. But she never did. All through-out the night she slept, peacefully, she seemed happy and never stired. Its strange how you never notice some things. Rith has always been beautifull. A symbal of the sun, bright and shining with golden hair. But under the calm moonlight.. shes truly a sight.

    She awoke the next morning happier than I'd seen her in a long time, then drug me to the hillside to join in her morning prayers. She even confessed to me one of the secret fantasies she has. Such high spirits.. but it was short-lived. Something is wrong now, bothering her. I need to find out what.

    Meril pulled through for me, and got me the information I need. I still need a little more, but at least I'm making some ground on this. The price I pay for Merils help? He has everyone believeing I'm to be a father soon.

    Jerrick and Lorie are having twins. It should be known that I called that before anyone ever knew. They need their alone-time. Just them, no interuptions from anyone else. I can at least give them that.

    Dash, shes been kidnapped, by who I've no idea but its obviously a trap to bait Rasuil out.. for whatever reason I'm not sure. He's almost feral.. I can only hope Riths scrying turns up some good news. I want my blue hair, trouble-making sister back in the den, and soon.

    Page ... full. Huh..


  • I feel horrible.. everything about me feels horrible.. and it hurts..

    I can't worry about me.. that bastard fae showed Rith her worst nightmare.. I've never been so angry.. I promised Jerrick I wouldn't go after him.. but if he shows his face again, he's dead.

    She was scared.. terror in her eyes.. hopeless, I did what I could to calm her, to let her know everything was alright. I think I helped.. I hope I did. It took all of us holding her to get her to rest.. Jerrick, Lorie.. Lune.. and..

    Fadia..

    While everyone was resting.. Fadia took it as a -perfect- chance to confess.. she loves me. Despite it all.. all of it, everything I've been going through, the worry.. the doubt.. the fear.. Adriell

    Deep down.. I know Fadia is hurting.

    Deep down.. I feel like screaming.. screaming untill I can't scream anymore.

    I can't worry about myself.. but I still feel horrible.. it still hurts.


  • I'm alive.. and its over, I hope. I still don't understand most of what went on. I only know the calculabe was the prize, we won it, and now its in safe hands. Safe hands that can destroy it.. soon.

    Safe to assume I'm no match for a large earth elemental. That hurt.. Now I know how Telli felt.

    Everyone split ways after coming back through that portal. I walked Just'ene to the temple.. then put Val to bed. Theres no telling where everyone else went. I just wanted out of peltarch. Been there far too much in both planes.

    So here I sit, in an empty den. Everyone is probably off getting some rest, and they should, they've more than earned it.

    I'll probably stay here for tonight. Want to go south.. but, I'm sure Troff will be there. I'm a horrible person.. we've been friends a long time, but now.. every time I see him, I'm reminded of her, reminded of what I'd rather not think about.. my doubts, my worries, my fears.. everything I..

    …

    I've a new blade. Two magical shortswords.. that when brought together create a double-sword, its cold to the touch, well balanced and very sharp. I can't help but think how Yngdir would have loved to use this blade.. it can even be taken apart back to the two shortswords. Very easy to carry around.

    Val let me use her bow for the final battle. It really was amazing, darkwood.. beautifully crafted. I needed a strength spell just to draw it back all the way. She spoils me sometimes... and I don't mind one little bit.

    Shannon smiled. No one else saw it but I did.

    There may be a small rift forming between Fadia and Rith. I know the calculabe was a powerfull thing that corrupted anyone. But still, everyone did not need to gang up on Fadia. Rith meant the best.. its a mess, maybe. Lets hope not.

    Oh, after this 'adventure' Lune is no longer a green-blood. She did good.


  • Time is running out.. this alternate plane, shifting.. thing. The complex mess we've been trying to figure out for a while. Its almost over. Odd how fire surpassed all the others. Have to admit.. kind of saw that coming. We'll be taking a trip into the sewers soon.. will not end well.

    Val, my bard-girl. Shes being haunted by this shadow-man. After reading the report on all thats happened… I think its time to kill him. Shes scared, she needs as many of us close as possible. He's probably pretty powerfull, but we've faced worse.

    Lune, she did good on a trip to the cold caves. Scared me a few times there, but that ogre picked the wrong one to go after. You don't just club our little healer. Shes growing up nicely, and shes getting stronger.. won't be long untill shes the one everyone is turning to for healing.

    Rith is staying as cheerfull as she can be, trying to keep everyone smiling. Even keeping me cheerfull. Shes happy on the outside.. but deep down its just cover. Haven't had any luck with those temples. But I'm not giving up! There has to be some way to reverse whats been done. I'd like to see her smile, and smile as if her soul itself was giggling