3. The Journal of Ael'Que Rahael

The Journal of Ael'Que Rahael


  • I am thinking on closing this journal. Last night the Swords drank a toast to new beginnings. And has I lay here, looking over at Uniel as she sleeps, I can not help but think an all new beginning might be nice. So it just might be time close this one for good. Time to start a new one.

    Now thats strange, how in the hells do I know she is hungry? She is not even awake yet!


  • Some things you do can never be undone. The words you say can never be taken back. No matter how much you wish it to be so.


  • There is something to be said for staying busy. I have volunteered to help Ama with the dance she is organizing. And have been out patrolling with many different friends. Today Ama took me to the Peltarch public bathouse. We talked of many things, and I told her of how different I have found life to be here.

    In Chondallwood, our tribe was never as open and friendly as many of the people here. With the exception of Uniel, I never had many friends. And definately never had a woman look twice at me. Now, it seems that some women do find something in me to like, or maybe more. Here they seem to judge more on actions, then looks. And though there are some who seemed wrappped up in their own little worlds, most people will always help or listen when needed.

    Well not all people. I have often pondered how the powerfull here can so easily dismiss those of us who seek to help. The planar rifts, or alternate realities, are an example. Many of the people I know have offered to help, myself included. But when we are there,, and have even traveled to these alternates we are treated more as tagalongs, then as a member of the group.

    Last night was the last straw for me. It is bad enough that the most powerfull sorcerer I know refuses to ever take into account that not all those around him are protected from damage by magic, which gets a lot of people hurt or killed. But now as a group, he and the others have taken it upon themselves to try to stop an event that could destroy Peltarch in a matter of days! And do they warn the citizens? Give the people a chance to flee. Or take the help freely offered by others? Hell no, they are the most powerfull force in the world! No way they can lose! The truly sad thing is, I had far more respect for them before all this. Do they not remember what happened to Jiyydd when just a few thought they new everything.


  • (( The handwriting is sloppier then normal, and there are small winestains on the parchment))

    Been drinking to much today. Trying to forget I suppose. It really does not seem to work as well as I had hoped. We had a Legion patrol through the gnoll woods. Uniel was along, and Benji made her officially a Private. So that was good. We still make a good team, still can anticipate were the other will swing. It was like the old days back in Chondallwood.

    Aloura was not there,, no sign of her all week. But, that is how she is I guess. Far more secretive then others I know. Ended up drinking with Benji and Persy in the Mermaid. Did I mention Persy died? We found her body up where those dam corpsethiefs hang out. I need to patrol that area more often. Anyways, after Benji left, Yuki showed up. She is a very different girl when she drinks. Much friendlier then her usually reserved self. Almost made me think she might like me. Strange. She will probably be back to normal after she is sober.

    End of the night I gave Persy a tour of the tower. She has a great sense of humor, and managed to make me laugh a few times. We hung out down in the bunk house until the early morning hours.

    And through it all, no matter who I am talking to, I still see your face. I have heard that time heals all. That people forget the faces of past loves. How I wish I could leap forward in time to the point where I have forgotten yours.

    (( The final few stains seem to have ben left by something other then wine,,something more like water))


  • (( Hastily written in a very shaky hand))

    Note to self, stop saving potions and start using them. They do you no good when you die.


  • I sometimes dream of living a less exciting life. There have been the trips to those other realities. I have been sucked into them now four separate times. Each time it has been various versions of the N'jast war. And everytime the traitors are different. It drives it home to me how anyone can succumb to evil, either for power, or in a search for revenge.

    I have made patrols to many dangerous areas. Many times with Brothe Rarydor. It was on one of those that I died. Aloura was there. I know that both her and Rary tried to get to me, it was just to late. Raryldor was able to raise me though.

    I have spent more time with the elusive Aloura. We share many of the same type of painfull memories of loss and abandonment. I find a measure of peace when I am with her. She seems to feel the same. She is definately around far more then she has been in the past.

    Ama returned from a trip with her sister Helen. All seemed fine at first, but suddenly today she has been more reclusive. I do not know who or what has caused her to lose her usual bright and sunny smile. I can only do as any good friend would and be there for her if she wants to talk.

    And to top off the week, Uniel has returned. She went along on a trip to recover some items that belonged to an old womans friend. It was good to have her and Ama fighting by my side at the same time. I hope she sticks around a little longer this time.

    There was only one thing to ruin it and that was a man named Njall. He is a friend of Ama's. He took umbrage with Delfina,an elvin woman, who was searching some dessicated corpses that had been prey of giant spiders. He tried to order her to stop, and she ignored him. So he first tries to choke her, and when her back was turned, he smashed her in the back of the head with his axe! He only left her alone when I threatened to kill him.

    Where are these so called men from that they would attack someone weaker then themselves without hesitaton? He claimed it was out of respect for the dead? Dust in a cocoon is apparently more deserving of respect then a living woman. He reminds me of another bully here in Norwick. Both have no problem battling someone they know they can beat, but back right down when they know might get their asses kicked.


  • As the weeks pass I find myself becoming lost in my training and my duties to the Legion. The pain is still there, but it slowly is helping to temper my soul into something stronger. I have forgiven Roisian, and I have been able to find it in my heart to wish her happiness wherever she may be. I know I have received a great gift in my vision. I believe I saw Sehanine. Perhaps it was ilusion. Perhaps not. But I will live my life as if it truly was her.

    My training includes patrols with many others. Aloura, a corporal in the legion, and a priestesss of Correlen. She is as beautiful as she is illusive. A great companion and I think a true frieind, when I can find her. And Ama'bael. An elven lass who is as kind as she is deadly. It amazed me that she has a twin who is equally deadly, and beautiful. Mia, Zarius, Danika, Squeaks, Daveth, Storn, and many others. All fine companions that I know I can count on.

    Part of my self imposed training has also been giving back. I try to emulate brother Raryldor, by assisting the newer members of our community. However, I try to include all of the races, not just the elves. I feel I owe them that much. And perhaps, if a few of them pass it on, the community might be able to survive the troubles ahead alittle easier.


  • Seven days can seem like a lifetime.

    I walked out of the south gate fully intending to fight untill somethng killed me. I do not even remember which direction I traveled at first. I do remember the first death. It was a goblin, amd I killed it with my bare hands. Then I had an old dagger to use on the next one. The battles became a blurr. There was nothing for me but the rage, and the pain.

    I am was not sure how much time had passed before I became conscious of my suroundings again. It happened gradually, like waking up from a very deep sleep. I was deep underground, and my first real sensation was of a bone deep wearyness. As I became more aware, I noticed the stench of blood and death. I was surrounded by the corpses of goblins and wolves and hobgoblins. My clothing was torn, and I held a broken dagger in my hand. I could even taste the vile flavor of their blood, and as I wiped my hand across my mouth, it came away red. Thats when I noticed the level of destruction I had caused. They were not just dead, they were shredded! Some of their throats torn out, as if by a savage beast! And perhaps they were.

    "No" said a voice, as if reading my mind. "Not by a beast, just by a man."

    It was then that I noticed the light, it was as if moonlight had taken the indistinct form of a woman. I could not see her face, but an overwhelming sense of calm seemed to emanate from her. I wiped my hands across my eyes, trying to clear this illusion from my sight, but she remained.

    "Come brother" she said, "let us leave this place of death"

    I walked with her from the cave into the bright light of day. She guids me down to a small stream, where I fell to my knees. I looked up at her, trying to see her face, but it was as indistinct by daylight as it had been in the cavern. Just a gentle glow that gave a sense of calm, and surprisingly, a deep feeling of love.

    "Why brother would you so lose yourself to your darker side?"

    I fumbled for the words, and finally spoke a single word "Betrayal"

    Silently she shakes her head, and I can feel the sadness flow from her in a wave. "My poor brother, She never betrayed you. She never lied to you. Look into the water."

    And I do, at first I see only my battered and bloody face, and then slowly my face is replaced by a vision of heart rending beauty. My Rosy, my love. But her face was twisted by grief, the tears flowing down her face. And now my own began to fall. "Why is she weeping?" I asked, "why is no one helping her?"

    "There is no one Ael'Que, she did not lie to you. She had no choice but to leave. She weeps for you."

    And suddenly I knew her words were true. I felt that door open deep inside of me, the one I had refused to open, and I saw her there! And I knew, when She said she loved me forever, that was true. When She said She would think of me always, that was true. When She said She did this for me, that was true.

    I looked to the vision of light and asked "Please, go to her for me, tell her I understand, and I forgive her. Please, tell her I love her. And finally, please tell her I hope she finds happiness someday."

    "I will do this for you brother, on one condition."

    "Anything, name anything and I will do it, even to giving you my life!"

    She stares at me sadly for a moment,"Then live."

    And she was gone. And I was left kneeling by the bank, listening to the birds, and realizing for the first time in many, many weeks, I was at peace.

    "She wants me to live?" I say to the birds and the trees,"then I better get started"


  • (( The page looks torn and wrinkled as if it had been torn and crumpled before being resmoothed and placed back in the journal))

    I finally recieved word from Rosy. The first letter said she had left for Waterdeep. Said a friend had died. It was a lie. She said how much she loved and missed me. How she was thinking of me. It was a lie.

    Today I recieved another letter, and a package from her. The package contained her ring, and her wedding dress. The one I never got to see her in. And a note. She said she was leaving me. She says it was because people were after her and if they knew of me I would be in danger. That she would love me forever, and would always think of me. It was a lie.

    Well Roisian, I must thank you. You have taught me a lesson I should have learned from Rhavaniel, or from Uniel. I can not live with this pain anymore. Three heartbreaks in one year is far more then any man should ever endure. I should have learned from that first one that there was no way a woman would truly love me. Just use me for the things they need, or the protection I could provide. And when their interest is caught by something else, leave me with no word.

    I wish I could say I never loved you. I wish I could say I am glad your gone. But most of all, I wish I did not mean it when I say, thank You.

    But that would be a lie.


  • Almost a month and no word from Roisian. No one has seen her. I do not even know if she is alive or dead. All around me I see people together, sharing their lives. I will not be hurt again! First Uniel disappears for almost a year, and just when I find Rosy, she reappears. Will this happen again and again to me? No. I am better off alone. Away from the pain, and the constant sense of loss. It is time to build back the walls I have long neglected.

    Only duty will remain.


  • The days here seem to blur together. Some do stand out, but most just flash by. I continue to train and have now been promoted to private. The legion is a good group of people. Even if I have disagreed with some of them, I know they can all be relied upon to stand and fight for the people here.

    We have been making more patrols into Jiyyd lately, trying to reclaim what was lost there. Hopefully we will be able to put an end to the demons and devils that enter our world through there. I have learned of a group called The Pheonix Guild. They are sworn to battle threats from the other planes, and other evils in this land. I have spoken to Rith, one of thier members about what it takes to join with them. We will see what comes of it.

    I asked Roisian to marry me. I was afraid she would say no. But she did not. We do not have many close friends here, but we will find witnesses amongst the elves we have come to know. Or, if need be, we will have only the gods themselves for our witnesses.


  • One year. I look back at my previous entries, and think of what a difference a year can make. One year ago, I arrived here, friendless and alone. Chasing a fantasy I had created in my mind. Only to find her dead. And to find Uniel alive.

    Then just as I come to grips with the loss of Rhavaniel, and my feelings for Uniel. She dissapears as well. No word, no signs. I searched for months. Nothing.

    And then I saw Roisian. Not a woman I would normally be attracted to. I thought her to flirty and weak. I was wrong. What I learned as I got to know her is she was wounded, deep inside her soul. But even after all she suffered, she was still a good person. Her beauty is even greater inside then out. She is the bravest and kindest woman I have ever met. And somehow, I am still amazed by it, we fell in love. She choose me, out of all the men in Norwick. If ever I have wanted some sign from the gods, she is it.

    And now, Uniel returns. Back from our homelands. She has changed much. She is calmer, and more confident. We talked, and cried. And in the end, she is still my best friend. Even though I know it hurts her to see me with Roisian she still wished us the best, and even seems to like Roisian as well.


  • This constant attacks of goblins has been getting tiresome. They are brave little creatures, but they attack recklessly and almost constantly. Usually the south gate is their target. I accompanied a large force thats goal was to put a stop to the attacks by stopping them at the source. The goblin hold.

    It almost worked. We had defeated all of the best the goblins could throw at us. And then the goblin's allies arrived. Huge bugbears of all kinds. They attacked in waves, each attack more viscious then the last. Untill a legion private named Hammer fell. his body was stolen by the bugbears and carried off. We managed to recover him after a viscious battle, unforunately we lost two others as well.

    We were finally able to retreat back to Norwick. There, our fallen were brought back from the dead due to the generosity of a man named Aelthes. We will need better strategy then this if we are to survive further encounters with these fierce enemies.


  • I have joined the Legion. An organization dedicated to protecting the people of Narfell. All people. It feels strange to stand shoulder to shoulder with humans and battle creatures not much different then I once was. I often team myself with a human female named Cara. She is brave and reckless. But also a good fighter. Uniel has joined as well. Her skills are increasing constantly. She comes near to besting me when we spar.

    Uniel has been causing me some concern lately. She is very possesive of me, and responds with jealousy and anger if another women even smiles at me. She told me she would use tribal justice on a woman who said I was handsome. After all those years I wasted on chasing Rhavaniel, I do not like this feeling as if I was owned by Uniel. If she was that angry about a compliment, how will she respond if a woman kisses me. No matter how remote of a chance that might be. I know she means well, but she could well end up in prison if she lets her jealousy take control. I do care for her, perhaps I do love her. I simply am not sure.